PLEASE HELP-im pregnant at 16. .& dont want the baby?

Question

Im only 16 & im pregnant, (my bf is 24) i have only been with my bf for 11months and i feel so stupid for keeping the baby! I was going to have an termination but the day came & i backed down-and i dont know why! My bf mum has got so much baby stuff & my head feels like it going to explode soon. I have been thinking and i dont want the baby but im too late to have a termination. . what shall i do?!

Answer 1

Maybe you should have that of that before hand?

Answer 2

I give you a lot of credit for being able to be honest and say that you just aren't ready to be a mom. It's a lot of work and when I had my first at 25, I wasn't ready. You never really are. I think that allowing your child to be raised by a loving couple is the greatest gift you can give your unborn son or daughter. If you are lucky, you may be able to have an open adoption where you can handpick the family, send and receive pictures and still maintain some sort of contact. Of course there are limits since the child would no longer be yours. Just remember that your hormones will reek havoc on you and you may go through periods where you may change your mind. By any chance, have you talked to the child's father about this? Is he aware that you are pregnant? My suggestion is to sit down with your parents, explain the situation and what your intentions are. Do your research on the internet by searching for adoption. Maybe try your local Planned Parenthood. They not only help with Birth Control, but they can assist with providing information. Good Luck to you!

Answer 3

You don't say how far you've gone with the pregnancy, so my first question would be: are you *sure* that you're too far advanced? I know that the laws differ in different countries and different states, but because you were underage at the time of conception it may be possible to obtain an exception. It's a question worth asking, at any rate.

Second: if you backed down on the day that you were due to have the termination, it sound as if you didn't have enough appropriate counselling and support to help you make your decision. So I would look for a neutral person (they may be difficult to find!) who can help you talk through your choices now, so that whatever you decide to do it really does feel like your own decision.

Third: you don't say much about how your b/f feels about it, but I sense that he's not got much sense of responsibility. You certainly shouldn't marry him just to get a father for the baby because that way lies heartbreak in a few years. You deserve to have what remains of your own childhood - you're only 16, for Heaven's sake - and you deserve the chance to get some qualifications and make a life for yourself on your own terms. Which means that I think you should seriously consider having the baby adopted - he or she will give much pleasure to a couple longing for a child of their own. Then give the b/f the bum's rush and get on with having a good life with wiser choices and fewer people to exploit you.

Answer 4

I am so glad to hear that you did not have a abortion that is soooo wrong killing a baby who did not deserve that and did not ask for it. If you don't want the baby you really need to sit down and talk to the bf and let him know exactly what your thinking if he willing maybe he can raise the baby or the best thing is adoption there are so many couples who would love to have a baby and can't but in my opion you really need to commuicate with the father of the baby and work out something cause it would be even more wrong if you just gave the baby up for adoption and the father of the baby really wants him/her and would be more than willing to take care of the baby hope everything works out for the best

Answer 5

Take a deep breath. You are coming to the realization that this baby is real and is really going to change your life. Look into an open adoption, and then you can provide the best life possible for your child and still have a full life yourself. It sounds like your boy friend’s mother is excited about being a grand mother. That is good, in that should you choose to raise this child, she will provide you with baby sitting and emotional support. You may want to sit down and talk over your fears with her. She may have some real solutions and suggestions for you and be able to help you set up a plan. How to finish school, and get a good job while raising this child, etc.

Here in the US, a 24 year old having sex with a 16 year old is illegal! If he is reported to the authorities, he could go to jail.

Answer 6

You do know that having sex with a 24 year old is illegal, right?
Anyway, adoption sounds like it may be good for you. There are so many people who cannot have children who would be more than happy to have your baby.
You can go through an agency that will let you pick the family and you can still have contact with the baby (I think) if you want.
Good Luck and please reconsider the boyfriend. Maybe someone your own age would be better for you.

Answer 7

My sis was there when she was your age...She knew she could not do the BEST job with the baby that she wanted...She gave the baby up for adoption..It was the hardest thing she EVER, EVER did, but she loved that baby sooooo much, and wanted the absolute best for the child. She knew that if he had a mom and dad, and a sister, he would grow up well..The family was a beautiful thing, and he was the answer to their dreams! Adoption is the greatest form of love in this situation. You do what is best for the child, for his entire life, and completely put aside your feelings and longings for him for the best interest of him...When he is older, he will see why, love you even more, and thank you! Praying you make the right decision...

Answer 8

if you really can't cope with this then your only option is to find a loving couple to adopt your baby there a loads of family's willing to give your baby a good life that can't have children
but honestly if you couldn't go through with an abortion as soon as you hold this baby in your arms your going to see what all the fuss is about and change your mind
don't rush into any big decisions yes your young but you knew what would happen if you had unprotected sex its time to grow up and take responsibility for your actions
same goes for your so called b/f!!really at his age he should have known better

Answer 9

well the way i see it if you were even thinking about killing your baby then you shouldnt even keep it. Give it up for adoption let someone who WANTS a baby take care of it. A baby is a gift from GOD he has given you this baby for a reason and its your choice to except it or not. I was not ready for a child when i got pregnant at 21 but you know what i would not trade him for nothing in this world.... He is my world a babies love is the best gift in this world there is nothing better. You were grown enough to spread your legs now you have to pay the price!!!!!!!!!!!

Answer 10

First off why is a 24 yr old sleeping with a 16 yr old. Don't you know he can go to jail for that. If you don't want the baby then give up for adoption so the baby can go up in a home with people who love him/her.

Answer 11

well it sounds like if you don't want it your bf does. however if you give it to him you are going to have to leave him or you are going to have to suck it up. It kind of sounds like you aren't telling people of your intentions and now it seems like the pregnancy has gone too far. I think that you will have to keep it. you are young and you say you don't want a baby but really you just sound scared. Once the baby is here you probably won't have these feelings anymore. just let your bf know that he is going to need to help you out A LOT! hopefully he has a good job and can really help so you can finish your education and go to college. good luck.