About a SMEAR TEST?

Question

My daughter is 27 years old, but she had damage to the central nervous system when she was born . She has grown up to be a lovely person, moody sometimes but basically a good girl with a comprehension of a child of about 12-13

My problem is that she has been invited for a smear test.
As you will know the thought of such a proceedure is not exactly enjoyable for adult females, and I know she does not want to do it.

Given her mental age and celibacy, should I cancel, or is it something that she ought to undergo?

Thank you for taking the time to answer.

Answer 1

A smear test is an ordinary procedure that has become part of routine physical exams. She should not fret. Neither should you cancel.

Answer 2

It would be better to go ahead with the appointment, even if you are afraid for your daughter. This way, she can meet the Doctor, and the three of you can talk about what it means to become intimate, or forced. While your daughter might be young mentally, she is a grown woman with a woman's issues. If the doctor is male, I would suggest a simple meeting, so you both are less shaken by the whole process, this might be a good time to tell the doctor of your concerns for your child. I might also suggest a female gyn. With the mental capacity your daughter has, it might be less traumatic for her. We see a few women in your daughters situation, and it is just so important to help them through this. You can tell the doctor your problems, your fears and the feelings that your daughter has expressed to you. Then, perhaps the next time she needs to be seen, she will feel less frightened.

Answer 3

I understand where you are coming from with her comprehension level but at her age, even with celabacy, it is still important that she gets checked up due to what we women have to go through with the what ifs of anything our body can be harmed by. Especially if there are any kind of past cancers/cysts etc on either side of the family. It is always good to detect problems at the earliest stage. I have a friend who has down-syndrome. She is 23 but has the heart of an 8 year old. I know where you are coming from and it will be hard to explain to her what is going on. If you do not feel she is ready to undergo this then you may want to talk to the doctor about coping methods.

Answer 4

Even though mentally she is about 12 or 13 her body is aged of a 27 year old. She is old enough either way to understand and undergo the procedure. With her mental state though I would suggest extra TLC before, during, and after the procedure from both you and the doctor and nurses. This test will be able to assure you in your mind she is exactly where she needs to be or not then you will be able to accomidate in her needs.

Answer 5

As long as you don't have a family history of cervical cancer, I don't think it would be necessary. Since she is celibate, it would also be extremely difficult to do. On the other hand, it might at some point become necessary, and it would go a lot easier with her if she had at least a passing familiarity with the procedure. If her first experience with this sort of exam was done with you near by for support, she would find it a lot easier than she would if it had to be done under different circumstances. I don't want to be alarmist, and heaven forbid it ever come to that, but one never knows what the future holds for our children. You might consider making some special arrangements with a good gynecologist, who can work with you to ensure that whatever exam is prudent can be done in circumstances which are not threatening or miserable for her. So before you reject the offer out of hand, it might be worth it to take the opportunity to at least speak with the doctor and see what they suggest or can arrange with you. Even if it's just for a visual exam, at least she would learn it's nothing to be afraid of and how to be cooperative if it ever does become a necessity. I haven't had to deal with this sort of problem myself, but I have always accompanied my daughters for that first female exam. That way, they learn that although it's unpleasant, it's not something to get too worked up over. I figure I have gone along for all the other things, and helped them with all the other parts of growing up, and this was just another one of them. The other reason for my advice is based on experiences I had as a nurse in an ER. When we had to do exams on girls or women who had no previous experience with that sort of thing, it was extremely difficult for them. It's not the best circumstances to begin with, and not knowing just makes matters worse. So do give it some thought to at least arranging a basic exam with a gynecologist, even if a pap smear is not done. It could help her a lot at a later date, should it ever become a necessity.

Answer 6

Don't cancel.
Although she has not had intercourse after the age of 18 she needs regular pap smears.

I can understand how distressing it would be for her and you, I just about have to get drunk for one myself, but it will be more distressing in the long term if you don't go ahead and she develops problems.

I would get her a book for children, with pictures, that will show her what will happen. She has the intellectial ability to comprehend this.
Try and reassure her as much as what you can and continue the support. Your doing a great job even by asking!
Stay with her, holding her hand and try distracting her with talking about something she likes to do. Maybe promise a 'surprise' afterwards. Something she can look forward to so the whole ordeal is not negative.

You may be surprised that she may very well handle it better than us!!!!

Answer 7

Why not it cant hurt and its for the best. Better to know that theres nothing wrong than to find out down the road that something was wrong and could have been done about it, But easier sayed than done so good luck with that.

Answer 8

Yes she should still have the test done. Virgins are not immune to getting HPV. I had an issue with HPV about 5 years ago while being (and still am at 35) a virgin.

But also talk to her doctor as well to see what they suggest.

Answer 9

If the physician believes she needs one considering she hasn't been sexually active then I would do it for her health. I am sure the doctor isn't going to recommend one as often as a woman her age that is on birth control (if she isn't) or one that is sexually active. Women that aren't sexually active and are not on birth control are also at risk for cervical cancer..just not as high.

Answer 10

well as rough as that sounds, i would go a head and go with it. it might not be that bad to just get done with and not have to worry as much. although in the end it should be up to your daughter and how she feels. my sister is much the same and she does alright but i would do it and also you might want to have her doc talk to her and maybe that will easy her mind some and yours.