I have a friend who hasn't had sex with her husband for many years. He says that since the birth of their child, he can't get the birth, the cutting, the blood, etc. out of his head, and he is turned off by sex. Is this a lie or an excuse? I think I have heard that this could possibly be a mental health issue. Does anyone know?
2007-07-30 15:57:57 · 27 answers · asked by cre8art 1 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Pregnancy
I had an emergency c-section, with a vertical incision, so mine is very noticeable. After I asked my husband if he thought is was gross and he said "No, that's where our sweet baby boy came out of! How could it be gross!" AND he is very very squeamish, but he was there for the whole birth and even took pictures!! (VERY out of character.) He also told me that after experiencing that he had a whole new level of respect for me and women in general, what we go thru to give our men babies!! lol
SO to me, it's sounds like a lame excuse or an mental health issue. Or maybe I'm just very very lucky to have my husband!
Oh and just for the record, he had a hard time waiting the required 6 weeks before we could have sex again!
2007-07-30 16:15:57 · answer #1 · answered by shannon ! 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I doubt it would make any difference, unless he is very squeamish, but how should that affect sex? They cut open her stomach... it could just be a type of post-traumatic disorder, maybe seeing anything happen to his wife like that would cause it. I don't see the reason for the sexual reaction, other than it being part of his fault. I still think if it was something different and he was present to see, say, her appendix removed, he could have the same issue. It is weird once you actually see in a human body.
Either way, c-sections are highly over rated and are performed a lot more often than are necessary, they are quick, a sure thing and makes a nice profit.
2007-07-30 16:04:06 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I do not know what is wrong with him... he may have a mental issue that needs to be adressed with therapy, but I have had 2 children, both times my husband at my side... first was born via c-section,,, and it didnt stop him, we had a second child vaginaly, and even with him laughing at be for having a "furry"(what he calls the image of the baby being born) we are still having a wonderful sex life, and I bet many other couples are too....
Dont get me wrong.... many men have problems with sexuality after women go through births and breastfeeding.... but most get over it, and get on with thier lives.... I personnally think that guy is iether full of it, or really needs professional help.
Good luck, and hope it helped.
2007-07-30 16:06:10 · answer #3 · answered by Holly M 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well...if you ask me...I think the guy has some issues.....I can't believe this guy is still saying after several years that he can't have sex with his wife because he has terrible memories of her C-section. He really has some serious physiological issues and I think this couple could use some serious counseling. He really needs to get over the whole birth and blood issues. To me, this is so strange. His wife went through 9 months of pregnancy and then the complications of birth...she brought HIS child into this world and he says EWWWW??? I'm sorry.....I feel for her and her wierd husband.
2007-07-30 17:31:53 · answer #4 · answered by ♥ Liz ♫ 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I met my husband after I had my csec and I showed him pics and everything and he even likes to touch the scar once in awhile but he is not turned off. I am currently preg. and he begs for sex. I think he either has something wrong w/him that he needs to get over or he is making excuses not to have sex w/her or getting it somewhere else and uses that as an excuse. Every guy wants sex and if he's not getting any he will screw about anything doesn't matter if they are skinny, fat, old, young, cute or ugly. Or maybe he turned gay..lol..always could happen.
2007-07-30 16:06:41 · answer #5 · answered by shortysml 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'd say an excuse and that they probably have more serious underlying issues. I had a c/s about 10 months ago and my husband and I have just as active sex life as ever. Heck he couldn't even wait the 6 weeks! So definately not something thats a turn off for my man... and probably not most either!
2007-07-30 16:01:36 · answer #6 · answered by librachick82 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
He's just one of the more sensitive kinds. Make yourself and your bed-room more receptive with sensual moves, music, colours, fragrances,dim lighting etc.
Go on an exercise programme, slim yourself down a little if you r plump now. Show him that you have made an effort and he should respond likewise.
You have the physical and he has the mental scars, but only temporary. Give them a little time to heal and everything should be fine. If it doesn't work out after 2-3mths, then seek some counselling, therapy together.
All or some of these techniques MUST work. Try them and both of you will be enchanted. Best of luck!
2007-07-30 16:13:16 · answer #7 · answered by Dolphin-Bird Lover8-88 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
me and my wife had our first little girl six months ago and my sister had a baby c section two weeks ago i think that when a mans partner has a child he thinks of her in different ways like to virtuous or to close to his own moms persona men have a hard time talking to people about these things so the blame the masculine stuff or make any excuses up because they are confused about there own feelings but need to realize that the mother of that child is still the person you wanted to have a baby with in the first place not mother Tressa or the Pb and j maker maybe he just needs needs some one to discuss it with because a man says things that are hurtful sometimes its a way of masking there on insecurities and emotion blood or no blood she is still the person you created that little life with and she should be treasured for what she is not revered.
2007-07-30 16:19:06 · answer #8 · answered by alankgore1969 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I've had 2 c-sections and 2 natural births and I still can't keep my husband away...that just sounds like the worst excuse ever....he needs some mental help...
2007-07-30 16:06:08 · answer #9 · answered by Jersey 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It is something in his head that is causing it. For some reason everytime he looks at her stomach he sees it opened up. It is definetly not a reason to prevent sex but it might be something mental with him. Im not saying he is mental just saying it is something in his head that is making him not want to do anything with her because it reminds him. Either that or he is afraid to get her pregnant again and doesn't want to go through the c-section thing again.
2007-07-30 16:01:21 · answer #10 · answered by Dee 5 · 4⤊ 0⤋