is someone less likely to divorce if their parents divorced?

Question

If a child grew up while his/her parents got divorced, would that child be less likely to divorce once that child became an adult and got married?

People answering this question, could you please star this question if you think its good that way I can get more opinions, i gladly appreciate it.

My girlfriend says she will never divorce me if we got married because according to her, divorce ruins people. However, she grew up with divorced parents, do you believe she might end up divorcing me anyway?

Answer 1

This will really depend on the person involved..

Some children from a divorced family are so paranoid about commitment that they may never even be in a meaningful relationship.

Others will be more cautious and WILL find a partner who they can be with the rest of their lives.

BUT, then there will be the people who lived through the divorce of their parents, and now just see it as a way out.

My husband and I both come from families that are NOT divorced, and neither he nor I see divorce as an option.

Answer 2

could go either way, depends on the reason for the divorce and how badly the child was affected:

1 - a divorce will be more likely because the child has not witnessed fully the sanctity of marriage and therefore could decide to give up when things get tough

2 - a divorce will be less likely as the child knows first-hand the rough time his parents (and he) had as a direct result of the divorce, and would not like to experience that (or for his children to experience that) therefore he would be more inclined to do whatever it took to make the marriage work.

Have I actually answered your question here or just stated the plain obvious? Apologies if you feel I have!

Answer 3

Probably more likely to divorce than less because you have to see successful relationships modelled to even believe they're possible. My parents divorced when I was 3 years old. I married when I was 20 years old, I was as idealistic a person as was humanly possible, but after 12 years Istill wound up getting a divorce. Was that my parents' fault? Of course not, but I had no frame of reference for seeing someone stick it out through all sorts of life-changes. Marriage is hard for everybody; it's enormous work far beyond what you can even imagine is necessary when you first get involved in it...Little things here and there give you an edge at coping and surviving where other folks collapse; any success you can see and pattern your behavior after will help you make a healthy relationship a reality.

Answer 4

I say to that question, just because a parent divorce does not mean that you will divorce. When you go into a marriage in for the long haul. And sometime, parents stay together at that time, because when the children are small they do not want both parent out of the picture, so they stay there for the children. Now on the other hand because your parents situation does mean that it will happen to you, if you are being honest with the marriage, and both trust each other and try to work out things with out involving other, then you can make it.

Answer 5

Your parents or other family members have nothing to do with it unless your partner has issues with the divorce itself. When two people get married it is because they love eachother they don't take into account if their parents are married or if their parents love eachother. When two people get divorced it is because of problems in their relationship not because of problems in their parents relationship. My parents have been married almost 50 years. I have been divorced twice. My husbands parents divorced when he was in his 20s. He has been divorced once. While our parents give us some perspective on how relationships work whether it is a good or bad perspective. It is how we as adults handle any incoming data or information. If you are truly in love with someone it comes naturally. There is no forcing it and other outside things don't play into it. The divorces come from people who think that they are in love and they are trying to force the love when in acutallity it isn't real love that you are in. This is from experience. My first marriage- I loved the idea of being married the stability that I thought marriage would bring to my life. It was all about the act of marriage and not my spouse. My second marriage- my spouse had two children and at the point in my life I wanted to be a Mom and a wife. so again it was about the act of being a Mother and a wife. Now on my third marriage and it is all about my spouse. I didn't realize what love was until him. We have been together 14 years now and it still amazes me the feelings that we have.

Answer 6

I don't think it has any influence. I know couples who grew up with divorced parents and they got divorced as well. It is much easier to get a divorce nowadays, then it was back in the old days. Women stayed with their men, because they were housewifes with no jobs and didn't know where to go. They just stayed for the kids sake. It was not acceptable to get a divorce when you lived in a small town. Basically, I believe it is our society that makes it so acceptable nowadays to get a divorce. Unfortunately, people are to busy or don't give it much effort to work things out. The women are emancipated and are able to make a living on their own.

Answer 7

No. Whether a couple divorces or not has nothing to do with their respective parents. Only the two people married to each other can determine a divorce. If the two people were not right for each other in a long term relationship, that would cause a divorce.

Answer 8

You know that is a good question. In my first marriage I stayed with this guy for 13 years I didn't want to divorce because my parents did. Well I talked to god and he helped realize that what I thought was love was not.I asked my mother if I could move back in she lied down some rules . The man I married a year in a half is a dream come true. So to answer your question It all depends if you find real true communication in your relationship . I have found out that some times it's best to have a reliable, understanding ,compatible ,
relationship. Try looking at your compatible relationship threw open eyes...Best of Luck....

Answer 9

No - that child has grown up seeing dysfunction in relationships. They've seen that their parents don't take commitment seriously, and they haven't seen their parents truly LOVE each other.
These things will make them MORE likely to divorce themselves.
However, if it's the choice between unloving parents staying together for the sake of the child or geting a divorce, the child will do much better with divorced parents. Kids aren't stupid, staying married only prolongs their exposure to unhealthy relationships & they'll be more likely to be in one as well.
Best option? CHOOSE to love each other, go to counseling. If it's not a two-way commitment, get out and save your child while you still can.

Answer 10

My parents divorced when I was 7 years old. I divorced my husband after 15 years and 2 kids later. I dont think it has anything to do with my parents just the *** hole I married!! Of course your girlfriend says she would never divorce you, I said the same thing to my husband, but hey ho 3 years after the court case I am still here to tell the tale!!