How can I best introduce my lovely Indonesian bride to Western culture & avoid cultural missteps.?

Question

My wife and I married in June and she is in transition to join me in the West. I've prepared our home for her but want to make sure I help her to transition with as little stress as possible. Also, I want to make sure we learn how to navigate our cultural differences in terms of how to relate to each other. We have had a couple instances where she was upset by something I said (too honest I suppose) - we recovered nicely though. I believe it should be fair compromise - neither culture should dominate the marriage. Are there any professional organizations or Websites out there that can help? - PS. She is highly educated and comes from an excellent family - no money issues etc..

Answer 1

I think the things that will be a constant issue are..

Food (How often will you eat steak and potatoes or her cultural food)
Entertainment
Social Rules/Gender Roles
Politics

I married a woman from another country and though she spoke crisp english and knew OF our culture she never had to live in it. Our disagreements base mostly on what we will have for dinner (her cultural food or food I am used to), where to set the thermostat and what men are supposed to do and what women are supposed to do. She has very rigid roles in her ind for men and lives by those rules but her ideas of her role are coming more inline to western feminist philosophy. The woman can evolve but the man cannot evolve.

My wife is educated and is mixing the two cultures together that would serve her best but I get the short end of both cultures. We are still working at it.

Answer 2

did you not get a user guide with the mail-order-bride....j/k. Cultural and language differences are something that you will have to work on a daily bases, because trust me a lot will be lost in translation. You both will have to control your temper and your pre judgements, which becomes very difficult in everyday stressful life. Be willing to explain everything no matter how tired you are, or feel there should be no explanation....

Answer 3

Honestly, unless you just pick all the wrong places to go, I've found that people from outside the US are generally treated well here, especially if they are well educated and speak good English. We really are a culture that is somewhat set in our ways but in general, we are only bothered by things we just don't understand. I doubt your wife will have a problem here. Just keep her away from the ignorant *** people. You know who they are. They're obvious.

Answer 4

take her to disney land/world, it will be a one stop shop for the technological and scocial make up of america, as well as a really fun way to spend a day or two