I had my birthday about 3 months ago. My boyfriend of 9 months didn't get me anything. when he said he was low on cash and should have me a present by my party i said whatever i'm just pumped for my party. At my party i never got anything from him. i talked to one of his best friends about it who happens to be one of my good friends too. He said that my boyfriend had talked to him about it and said he felt really bad because he really wanted to get me something nice, but didn't have any money. He also doesn't have a job but gets about $20 a week. I never talked to him about it and never really let it bother me that much. Then i saw one of my friends boyfriends get her a really nice ring for her birthday i it all came to me that the stuff that he has got me has been really cheap and not seemed to have alot of thought in it. We have never had a fight and i'd rather not bring it up to him and start something. I still really ignored and angry with him, but i just don't know what to do.
2007-07-30 08:58:45 · 5 answers · asked by kristen 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
A lot of people will probably say to quit being a gold digger and things like that, but you don't seem like that's your intent. See, different people have different "love languages," ways that they prefer to receive demonstrations of love. For some people, saying "I love you" is enough. Some people need physical affection. Some people need quality time. Some people need random gifts/favors to show them they are thought about and cared for. Some people need support and encouragement. Maybe gifts are your "love language," but not wanting to seem like a gold digger, you try to ignore it. Don't ignore it. Don't tell your boyfriend, "Buy me things if you really love me" but don't ignore how receiving gifts makes you feel, or how NOT receiving gifts makes you feel. Try talking with your boyfriend and just let him know that when he does get you things, it makes you feel really special, knowing that he thought of the gift or idea or favor for you himself. Try not to focus on the cost of the gifts - some boyfriends are more financially blessed than others - but try encouraging him to just put some thought into things. If you don't make it sound like you just want him to buy you a ton of stuff, he will probably understand. It took my husband awhile to figure out that I love receiving gifts from him. Because I want more stuff? No, because it made me feel special knowing that he was thinking of me, and wanted to make me smile. Try to put it in this context, and see what he can come up with;) But remember, whatever his attempts, be thankful and feel special, because you ARE special to him...even if he doesn't have the mountain of cash that he'd like to be able to use to show it.
2007-07-30 09:07:51 · answer #1 · answered by HollywoodHousewife♥ 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
To be truthful, many guys are kind of...well...dense. Their tastes in presents and girls' tastes in presents are completely different. At least he didn't forget about your birthday, but you can casually ask him about the present, but when you see him raising his voice, then back off. It's probably difficult for him to get only $20 a week, and you can always tease him to buy you things that will make up for that.
2007-07-30 09:03:33 · answer #2 · answered by faye 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
When you don't have a lot of money , you don't buy expensive stuff.
When you are young you have no idea what to get others.
When you are shallow , you worry about such things.
When you are older and wiser, you learn to appreciate people for who they are, not what they do for you.
and you learn not to judge relationships against what others do or what you have done in the past.
2007-07-30 09:08:26 · answer #3 · answered by Sophie B 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
look obviously you kids are like 15.. What do you expect from the poor guy? His allowance is small, and atleast he was thinking of you!!!! In your defense however, he could have atleast picked you flowers.
2007-07-30 10:27:21 · answer #4 · answered by amandalynnesmith19 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
what a douchebag.**** him
2007-07-30 09:01:10 · answer #5 · answered by ma$e 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋