I appreciate honest answers from women out there. I have been married for 6 months and I am not happy. I brokeup with my boyfriend of 4 years 1 year ago (it was never official, things just kind of fizzled), then reconnected with an old friend and we married 6 months later. I guess it is a rebound, I don't know. Well, my husband is a great guy and does everything to try to make me happy, but I am not. I only think about my ex all the time, I miss him too much, feel bad for how things ended (as we never really officially ended things) and love him dearly.
I wish most of the time I wasn't married so I can go be with my ex and marry him instead. I know he was so heartbroken when I got married and became very depressed.
Now that it has been 6 months that I am married, I ask you will I become happy? So far I am not? I am sad. Will this change?
Should I get divorced, I am so confused....
2007-07-30 07:34:16 · 15 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
If your new husband wants to make you happy, then you should let him by allowing you to leave.
I would email this question to him and discuss it with him. Often, open communication works wonders.
Best of luck
2007-07-30 07:42:01 · answer #1 · answered by brettj666 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It is not about US being honest with you. It's all about YOU being honest WITH YOURSELF.
Whatever happened in your past with your former boyfriend has not arrived into closure and your marriage may have been a hasty step you have taken when you were still not ready for a serious commitment and not thinking clearly.
Now the time has come to face reality and look inward for answers only you can provide.
I suggest that you speak with your husband about this with honesty. Sooner rather then later, since it seems that neither you nor him are in a good situation.
DO NOT, and I repeat, DO NOT, contact your former boyfriend. Make sure you take some time to think things out by yourself. Perhaps you should move out, and be with some family in order to clear your mind and truly figure out what you want. It may be that in the end of your time alone you will realize that all you needed is an official ending with your ex, and are ready to give your marriage your full attention, or vice verse.
Whatever you decide from now on, make sure you take your time and think things trough, be honest with yourself and the people around you, so you can achieve clarity and happiness.
Do not despair, it's not the end of the world and often times the hardest thing to do is the right thing to do.
Good luck.
2007-07-30 14:46:33 · answer #2 · answered by artist-oranit.com. 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My first thought is to feel sorry for your current husband. You unfortunately made the mistake of marrying someone to get over another person. 6 months is really not a long time to make a judgement on your happiness. Marriage takes time to be successful and if it's with the right person it can be incredible!
My questions for you are: Have you told your spouse you're unhappy? Do you know if your ex feels the same way for you? Have you tried counseling? Did you ever really love your husband?
2007-07-30 14:45:12 · answer #3 · answered by Perplexed 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It sounds like you weren't thinking right when you married this guy. Honestly I don't know if you will be happy, that is up to you. You have two options, find what you love in your husband (there has to be something or you wouldn't have married him), and work things out. Or you can get a divorce.
Now I cant tell you which to do, that is up to you. You are an adult you need to make adult decisions.
2007-07-30 14:44:17 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Read most the answers.. and a lot of good advice...
but I don't think divorcing ur husband...
means...............
u can go back to the ex.. and live happy ever after..
'
you done screwed up... big time...
if u aren't happy.. and have really tried... yes.. divorce..
but tell him first that u have been unhappy... ...i am sure he knows...
then move on to another place in time...
if ur ex wants u.. !!!!!! make him pursue u... !!!!!!!
are u will make another mistake... !!!!!!!!!!
all over again..
in the meantime... don't have a baby... !!!!!!!!!
get your life straight...
don't get a child involved in your problems.......
2007-07-30 15:02:21 · answer #5 · answered by ♥ Blondie ♥ 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You have alot of soul searching to do before you throw away a good guy. Yeppers, he was a rebound. That's usually not a good thing to be. Does your ex want you back? Have you discussed this with him? Better make sure the feelings are mutual before you hurt your husband.
2007-07-30 14:39:34 · answer #6 · answered by Kelly773 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you can at least try and see if you can make this marriage work then I would suggest getting a divorce. But, remember sometimes the grass is not always greener on the other side.
2007-07-30 14:39:14 · answer #7 · answered by Mama~peapod 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Get away from both for awhile, clear your head and think. Make your decision. The grass isn't always greener on the other side you know.
Think about what you want and then do what makes you happy.
2007-07-30 15:07:56 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you need to separate for both men to figure out what you really want. If you decide to divorce, don't rush over to this other guy. Be on your own for a while.
2007-07-30 14:38:26 · answer #9 · answered by Royalhinney 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Honey you shouldn't settle... or expect to become happy later... What if something were to happen to you in a week... Would you regret being married and not spending your last week happy?
2007-07-30 15:17:26 · answer #10 · answered by Nikki 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋