What can I do?

Question

I have two daughters ages 13 and 10. Some friends of ours have a son who is 11. My oldest daughter has said that the boy on repeated occasions grabbed her face and forced her to allow him to put his tongue in his mouth. Both of my daughters say that this boy also masturbates in front of them (under his shorts) and then grabs it from the outside and shakes it at them, and has made sexual comments to them.
I have spoken to the mother of this boy and she says my children are lying. The boy is not being punished...in fact it is quite the opposite. The mother is comforting him and encouraging him.
My daughters can provide details such as times, locations, what was on T.V., where they were sitting, even down to the color blanket he had covering him.
Basically I was told by the mother that she believes her son 100% and that it's our word against theirs because he left no marks. If that was the case then rapists would go free as long as they didn't leave bruises. .............

........What would you do if you were in this situation?

He gripped her jaw....same as you would a 2 year old with a marble in her mouth. How am I "not helping"?? And as far as them knowing details, they are KIDS! They didn't just pull this out of the sky. I have questioned both girls seperately and they have the same answers. Also, my children have never been in any kind of trouble. They have never even been suspended and they both are on honor roll. So why would they lie???????

I was just trying to show that my children have no history of trouble. This is the first time ANYTHING has ever happened. And the moment I found out I called the mother and cut all ties with the children. The only contact has been over the phone talking to the mother.

I was just trying to show my kids' character. Actually the boy has been suspended and also was supposed to go to summer school because he failed his grade but his parents opted not to send him. They didn't see the need. That's what I mean.....they didn't "see the need" in sending him to summer school so that he could pass his grade. He does no wrong!

Answer 1

If I were you I wouldn't allow my girls to suffer if the girl is their and also their friend just allow her to come over to your house her and only her this is if her parent allow it...the son seems to already be out of control and from what you are saying the mother is not trying to help him in any way...spare the rod, spoil the child if only she would teach her little son what is wrong he would know, but it doesn't seem that way so this is going to be on her as he get older--sorry to say but sounds like he is going to make her weep many days when he get older...it is sad how parents allow this. If the boy comes any way around your girls tell them to fight him back, bite, kick, and scream if they have to he could go beyond the kissing of course. I would also keep in eye on the young girl of the brother only God knows what goes on in that household. Do not punish your children and the young girl keep them together and let them play, you might be teaching the little girl what the mother is not teaching the son...she may need your help...smile and do your job as a mom and you'll get your reward someday

Answer 2

why question it what kind of parent are u keep the child away from her and press charges have kid sent to a junville detention or ydc and get a restraining order and wouldnt be bothered with the family either. and also press charges period. inless u dont believe your daughter and dont care about your daughter instead of broadcasting something so personal online and also attend to your daughter. instead of being online your daughter needs you . and by bringing it up online u are looking for wrong advice comments and also people judging you and then now all know your daughters personal business which isnt right thing to be telling and broadcasting to strangers u should also get your daughter in counseling and be talken to police counselors the school family about it not strangers. you should also take the kids pic also will attract wrong attention and give bad impression of you and also predators do go online and they definetly will get wrong attention and also hackers that could be predators Id watch for.take the kids pic of this .

Answer 3

you could call the law and i believe you should but it will be a typical case of "he said she said" -- since his age falls between the girls they should not be in the same class at school == i would lay the law down to the girls and the boy 's parents that you do not want any contact what so ever between the children == by the way i would just wright the mother off as a "former
friend and i would not have anything to do with her either,

Answer 4

That sucks...I would cut ties with that mother, something very bad is obviously going on with that child. Why would you allow your daughters to be around him?

What does being on the honor roll have to do with lying? I don't get that connection???

EDIT-And the boy has obviously been suspended and is not on the honor roll, right?

If she is your friend, you need to tell her that the boy needs help, it sounds like he is being abused in some way, or something is wrong. If she is in denial then there is nothing you can do except have nothing to do with her in the future. She'll figure it out after the kid goes to juvie or ends up institutionalized.

Answer 5

I'm not sure how you can "force" someone to open your mouth if you don't want to, especially an 11-year old boy. He knows this riles them, so you are not helping the situation either, if true or not. The obvious solution is for the girls to remove themselves from his vicinity. Providing precise details is often used by police against the complainants, because none of us recalls these details without having an ulterior motive.

Unless or until he leaves a semen sample somewhere that the girls grab (right), it's his word against theirs.

Answer 6

Nothing should come before the safety of your children. If you have stressed to their mother on several occasions about what is going on and nothing has come from it. YOU NEED TO KEEP YOUR CHILDREN FROM SEEING THIS BOY.

Believe it or not your children can become sick of complaining and not further say anything since nothing is being done. Please keep them away is not worth it. If the mother has not even taken the initiative to talk to all the children together or make effort then she does not need to be friends of the family.

Answer 7

NEVER let your children go near that child. he will only get worse and he will progress to worse things.

and then call the police and file charges against this boy. that is completely disgusting and he is headed down a terrible path.

if the mother refuses to do something then outside help is completely necessary.

he is not only doing things in front of your children but is actually touching them and doing things TO them he should not be. it does not matter if he is 11 or 21. a crime is a crime. press charges. period. your putting your child in danger if you dont.

Answer 8

I would ensure my daughters are NEVER in the company of that boy without an adult present. Ever. He molested your daughter! I would actually call the police and press charges for sexual assault. He is a rapist in the making.

Answer 9

Keep my daughters as far away from this kid as possible. You'll get nowhere with the mother and someday the boy is going to go a little further and you don't want your girls to be the ones he tries it on.

Answer 10

I don't see what you are waiting for CALL the cops & turn that boy in. He is a pervert & needs to be dealt with.