please rate
i welcome criticism
it makes me stronger
Something has happened to my name
something different
something deeper
than my mere physical presence
I am not the same person
as i was a month ago
as i was only days ago
i have been changed
by the eternity of time
like a canyon carved
by an ever flowing river
the water rushes through me
cutting me down until my trucore
my true heart
is exposed
for the world to gaze upon
Eternity beams down on us all
watching
a moon among stars
eternity is always changing
but always the same
guiding us, blinding us
watching us
something has happened to my name
i am not the same person
who wrote this poem
2007-07-30 07:00:28 · 4 answers · asked by allena s 2 in Arts & Humanities ➔ Poetry
to the guy with the burning stick figure:
thank you for pointing that out, i'm not qute sure if ur talking about a physical tranformation. i'm talking about a psychological transformation, a transformation that any poet should encounter while writing at least one poem in thier life. it is the changing of your state of mind, your perspective of how you view the world around you.
p.s. i'm only fifteen, so i guess u'd be right huh?
2007-07-30 07:18:31 · update #1
it shows a thought process that has a bit of maturity in it substance, Very nice. Thank you for sharing.
2007-07-30 07:11:04 · answer #1 · answered by fuzzykitty 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you are not the same person that wrote the poem, the transformation occurred after you wrote it. So, why do you refer to the transformation in the past-tense in the poem? This is chronological inconsistency.
The poem seemed rather "teen angst" to me.
2007-07-30 14:09:33 · answer #2 · answered by lithiumdeuteride 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You step into the time machine right in the middle. I like it.
2007-07-30 14:19:11 · answer #3 · answered by TD Euwaite? 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I found a question "who wrote this poem".
I guess you did.
2007-07-30 14:11:04 · answer #4 · answered by Crystal Vols 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋