I am nearly 17 wanting a baby?

Question

i have a great boyfriend and i am not the sort of teenager that goes out spending all their time hanging round town i don't know whether its a good idea

using friends account no nasty answers

i have finished school and moving in with my boyfriend

Answer 1

I think 17 is far too young for a baby - you don't know what you will be giving up
The fact that you are asking complete strangers if you should have a baby speaks volumes about your maturity.
How would you pay for this baby? Where would you live?

Answer 2

If you really do have a great boyfriend then he will wait for you while you finish school and go to college. There is plenty of time for you to have a baby once you are more ready. Even if you feel you can handle a baby at this time, and I am sure you could, think about the child. Would the baby rather have a young mom with only a high school education, living with her boyfriend, or would the baby rather have a loving married mother and father, with a stable income and a college degree. You are still young, live you life while you can, you may not realize what having children does to your social life. You should be out meeting new people and partying with your friends, not sitting at home with a baby at 17. So since you seem like a smart girl, make the right choice, for yourself and your future baby.

Answer 3

I am not going to make any comments about your age or maturity because I don't know you. I had my daughter when I was 20 years old and my life has completely changed. I do not have the same friends anymore, I don't go out, I have a mortgage and bills and did not get as good of an education I had wanted BUT I would not give her up for the world and I feel my life is better having had her. However if it isn't too late and you have a choice I would recommend that you spend a few more years enjoying being young and not having so much responsibility. My baby was a wonderful accident and if I had planned to have a baby knowing what I know now I would have given it another 5 years : ) Good luck to you in your decision, I know what being clucky is like but you cannot be prepared to have a child, nobody is! Until you have one you've got no idea how hard it will be, being pregnant is great fun but then you have a lifetime of putting someone else before yourself every second of the day.

Answer 4

The idea of a baby is great you think there so cute and small but you have no idea of the hard work, you are only 17 live your life, All of my friends have had baby's when they where 14 another Friend was 16 and the next 2 where 18 and they will all tell you they love there kids to bitz but if they could wait for a few more years they would, They are all in there 20 now and have kids from the ages of 9, 5, 1, 1 and half, and 8months,

I have alot of experience with minding children and it is so hard, i recommend that you go out and mind some baby before making this Hugh life changing decision see if you can take them over night and you will soon see how hard it is.

Answer 5

I am 30 with 2 daughters aged 12 and 9. I love them both dearly and we have a great time together and always have. It is possible to be a great parent at a young age, I was.
However You do miss out on so much which you probably wont realise until your mid to late 20's.
Nothing is that simple whee you have children no matter what anyone says.
My opinion is that at 17 you should be studying, building friendships, travelling the world, getting a career under your belt.
Dont get me wrong, many people will say you can do all of the above even with kids but its a hell of a lot more difficult.
If you have a great fella why dont you both travel together. Get some life experience's first. It will make you a wiser parent.
Speak with parents and family and friends about it too and im sure they will say the same thing.
Your lucky to be so young enjoy it and good luck with whatever you decide x x

Answer 6

I know how you feel, honey, because my career goal was always to be a wife and mom. But some things need to happen first.

Commitment--no babies until there's a ring on that finger and a stable home.

Education--what happens if hubby splits? How are you going to support the little one? You need to at least get enough education so you can support yourself & the baby if something happens.

Maturity--You sound much more mature than most teens, even most teens who want to have a baby. But I would like to see you grow for a couple of years before undertaking such a huge step.

One thing I would recommend you do during that time is work in a day care center, with the babies, or volunteer at a local hospital rocking the babies, or even borrow a friend's baby for a few hours every week.

It's a very important fact-finding mission for you. After you're done, you'll have a much better idea of whether you yourself think you're ready for mommydom. Trying it on for size could yield some important facts.

What's your boyfriend doing? It would be really great for him to have a college degree and a good job before baby enters the scene. You don't want to have to scrimp and save just for the basics. You want to buy cute little things for him, and toys, etc.

Do you have your own apartment? That would be crucial before having a baby, unless you plan on living with your parents.

Just a pile of things to think about. Take care, and think about this really well before you make your decision.

Best wishes,
TX Mom

Answer 7

I wanted a baby when I was your age, but my boyfriend was not ready at all. He is now my husband and we had our first child when I was 25. I am so glad we waited. We had such a good time before the baby came, we've got loads of great memories etc. I look back now though and realise how much I would have missed out on. I'm still young and will have a long time with my son. You may think you are grown up and ready now, but you wait till you are my age and then you will realise (like I did) that you are not! It's really not easy being a mum too, especially if you have no family close by.
Have a good think about it first, and make sure that it is what both you and your boyfriend want if you do decide to do it.

Answer 8

I got pregnant and had my son when I was 17. I did NOT plan it. Instead of going to a 4 year university I wound up at the community college. Nothing to be ashamed of...just not what I wanted. His father who was SO supportive the first few months of my pregnancy got bored with it. I don't even know where he's at right now. I spend my days running around with a toddler, studying (when I get a free minute), and working. Once in a while I do get lucky and my parents will watch him while my current boyfriend and I go to a movie.

I am in NO WAY regretful of my decision to keep and raise my son. He's the greatest gift in my life. It would have just been nice to have him a little later on. When I had a degree and a career and financial stability. After I had traveled. No one can make you change your mind about having a child. Babies are cute and cuddly...when they aren't yours. Babies also require a lot more love than they give. The exhaustion is unbelievable.

And the financial responsibility... My boyfriend and I are expecting our first child together. We rent a 3 bedroom townhouse. The bills we have are unreal. I think we top out around $3,500 a month. Forget saving any money.

It's just very distressing when young girls are so determined to have children. Please...think this through. You have years and years to have children. Spend these next few years enjoying life. You'll have great memories to look back on one day...great stories to tell your children...

Answer 9

You need to get to know your boyfriend away from parents. Go to college. You will miss out on your college years and might never go to college. I am 30 and having my first baby. Wait until you have a job making at least $30,000 a year or you will not have enough money to buy the extras you might want. What does your boyfriend think and is he in college? Get to know each other and get married first then dicuss having a baby it will be a more lasting reltaionship. A baby a month will cost about $1000 for diapers, clothes, food, and daycare can you afford that now. You will enjoy the child more when you a few years older due to the fact you will probably have a house and loving spouse to help you. Now if you get pregnant with him he can leave at anytime and never see him again. What would child support due if you can't find the father? Please rethink this and wait.

Answer 10

Hi, at the end of the day what ever decision you make is your for life. I wanted kids young myself so i know where your comming from. I didnt have my first until i was 25 which looking back i still would like to have been younger as the older you get the less patience you have and the less you can do. My mind is still younger than my body...lol
The only thing i can say is on the other hand if you have children they take up ALL your time one way or another for a long time. Only you can make your life, think of all options, the other thing i will say is that alot of people will say wait until you can afford children. If you do that you never will have them...lol. All a child needs is the very basics and most of all love. Good luck with what ever you decide...

Answer 11

I got pregnant accidently when I was 18 and had the baby and I married the guy who was 21. And we are happy. But it sucks a lot that I didnt get to finish school because now I stay home and take care of the baby and I dont want to put her in daycare so I really have no way of going to collage right now. I would never say I regret it but i have no time for friends and really no friends that stuck around after I had the baby. It really scared them all off in a way. So it sucks. Plus it is expensive with paying rent and food and all the other bills that go with it. I just wish I had a career. so plz plz just think about it and at least finish collage and if you are still with the guy after that then maybe start having kids. for now just work at a daycare or after school program to be with some kids, or do some baby sitting. it might help take the urge to have one away. :)