What do you think about my husband and the neigbor?

Question

One day my husband was going to put the cover on my car and she was out side cutting her grass and she didn't know that I was standing there by my husband and I saw him look at me and then I look over there at her and she was looking at my husband, but when she finally realize that I was standing there she quickly turn her head and continue to her grass. "What do you think?"

One day before my husband and our family move into this house, we use to stay in a small apt. and one day we was out riding and we came home at 8:00pm and my husband said that he need to go get some milk from wal-mart and as time went by I stayed up late worried about him it was 2:00am when he came home but there was no milk in his hand I ask where have he been and he said he was at a topless bar, so I went in the living room and I saw dollars of one's on the table, and I said you beening females some money at this topless bar that money could by in my pocket, he said that he had order a drink and he didn't have any change the drink was a soda. So he came and ask me to forgive him and I did and every sense that day I couldn't trust him anymore and 4 years went by and we move into this house and now it's hard for me to trust him and if he can Iie about one little thing he can lie about everything like now my gusts are telling me that he could be meeting up with the neigbor in the morning. But he always says no he is not cheating on me. "what do you think about this?"

Answer 1

yes..its pretty obvious that he cheated you

Answer 2

Well, ask yourself this question. Are you happy about your marriage? Is he happy about the marriage? Why did you get married in the first place? Don't use the answers of, "because we were in love; or because we meant to be together; or we are just right for each other; or he got me pregnant and he said he will marry me. These are just actually answers that are very common.

Look at the situation, whether before the marriage, were you 2 the happiest people on earth to be together? What about after marriage? 2 years down the road? Are you both having doubts and asking yourself whether being married together is the brightest idea?

Men tends to have the urge and the mind set to think about...
"What would happen if I was married to that chick next door to me now?" They are just assuming that their life because maybe you aren't doing enough for him. So, sit down by picking a place where you 2 been before and is the most remembered place you 2 had been. Then say to him, "Honey, could we just have a discussion about what happened recently about...???"

If he said alright then go slow, don't fire bullets at him when you haven't had an answer yet that you can believe. Make sure that you get an answer that you can believe. by being open minded and also netural, you will know whether you believe him or not.

Good luck and if you like to ask more, you can always write to me and I would try to help

Answer 3

I'm just a guy, and you may not want to hear what i have to say, but maybe i can give a little insight, I'm married and have been for over 20yrs, i love my wife, but it has not been a fairy tale story, there's been plenty of hard times and good times, but there have been times when i have just wanted some alone time, it doesn't mean i cheated on her during those times, because i haven't, i just needed some time to thank, yes he may have lied about the milk, but he could have continued the lie, but he didn't, but by doing it to begin with he planted some doubt in your mind, and he lost your trust, the only way to earn your trust back is if he knows that he lost your trust to begin with. This may sound like a broken record but you need to open the real communication lines between you and your husband, and discuss your true feeling

Answer 4

You may never be able to trust him. I would go mad if my husband went to a topless bar. Sometimes people do cheat on their partners, male and female but alot of us women just seem to put up with it . Its difficult to know why. Your husband may not be cheating. You don't really have proof. I guess you could look more into this and see if anything really is happening; but what would your decision be if he is cheating on you? Do you have children? You will have alot of thinking to do if you discover he is cheating. Also could you ever forgive him? My advice would be to consider throwing him out if he is cheating on you; he will most likely do it again. However, if you feel the marriage is repairable; spend more time together, go out together; go away for weekend breaks and try to rekindle your feelings for each other if they are faltering. You may have a chance this way and less chance of his cheating again. However, make it clear to him that what he did was wrong and hurt you deeply. If you feel he is truly remorseful then the marriage is probably worth fighting for.

All the best!!

Answer 5

Based on the one incident you described where the neighbor was looking at your husband, I can't say that he's cheating. Are there other signs? I understand that you are still suspicious of your husband since the prior incident but if has done nothing in 4 years to make you not be able to trust him, I think you should trust him unless he give you cause not to. Just keep your eyes and ears open to the situation. Also, please don't accuse your husband of cheating unless you have more proof than what you have described. It will only hurt your marriage if you start falsley accusing him of cheating.

Answer 6

Oh god, im laughing so hard...

Women are so insecure and untrusting that they seem to be willing to suspect thier man of cheating on them for no good reasons at all....

It's a good thing my wife is not this untrusting and suspiscious, cause if she was i'd find the atmosphere in the house so oppressive that i probably would go cheat!

Lady you need to go become a nun or something.

The guy gets an urge to stop at a topless bar and feeds a few $1's into some girls panties and gets himself worked up, most likely with the intent of bringing home the sexual energy that he built up to use on you.

You turn around and try telling him that was your money and he shouldn't have given it to her.... WOW (assuming the guy works) you think he's supposed to give you all of his paycheck and not spend a few bucks occasionally?? WTF??

The man sits there and is honest with you and then apologizes to you. You said you forgave him, but lied, and decided you couldn't trust him when he was completely honest with you!? Holy crap did you forget to take your medication that day?

Then some neighbor woman happens to look at his butt while he is putting a cover on YOUR car. And you sit there and accuse him repeatedly of cheating on you with her??? Woah lady, this man needs to have you committed!!!

Answer 7

Listen to your gut. Your brain is already telling you that he's capable of being a liar and a cheat. Plus, the fact that he's going to topless bars says alot about his character anyway. I'd keep close tabs on him, but don't let him know that.

Answer 8

I think any man who will flat out tell you that he went to a topless bar isn't going to cheat on you. Stop making a mountain out of a molehill before you drive him out of the house.

Answer 9

Please do not go by presumptions. If you have doubt, expreess what is your doubt and let me say that you are not correct. If he engages in talking with neighbours, you also can talk with your other neighbour . If he is addicted, the remedy has to be different. But one cannot give up immediately. In several ways a partner can make him/her behave in the manner you want.Betraying continuously is not possible even for a lier.

Answer 10

You think your husband is cheating cause he looked at your neighbor...or she looked at him, then you think 4 years ago he was cheating cause he went to a topless bar.........wanna change your problems with mine? You are way too bored, you need to find a job or a hobby.

Answer 11

Well with out trust a relationship will fail. If you honestly have a feeling he is cheating then try and catch him so you will know and can get away from him. Or you can just trust him until he gives you a reason not to.