Please dont criticize. I have been wanting a child for about 4 years now. I dont know why. I just have this feeling that I want a child. I dont think i cant get pregnant. I have tried to get pregnant for about a year but still nothing. Im afraid to tell my gyno and/or my doctor that i want a baby becuz i dont want to look stupid if theres nothing that they can do to help me. People just dont understand. Everytime i see somebody with a baby my heart aches. People tell me that my time will come but im ready now. Mentally, physically, and financially. I hope somebody can help me with this. i need someone that will give me a serious answer on how to go about with this and someone that i can ask questions to on yahoo messenger. I wont stop trying until i get what i want. Please help. This is making me insane and very very depressed. I just cant get over the fact that after trying for so long i havent gotten pregnant and the fact that i might not be able to at all. Thank you!
2007-07-29 20:58:01 · 23 answers · asked by Amber 2 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Trying to Conceive
Its not "just my hormones" I have my goals set and my mind determined. But theres one thing that is pulling me back and i dont know why:::the fact that i want a child. My boyfriend has 2 twin brother which are 3 and a 1 year old brother and their mom thinks im crazy becuz im there every day playing with them. I never get tired of them....yeah sometimes i get mad but i never put my hands on them i never scream or yell or lose my temper at all with them. I love being around them. And being around them just makes me want a baby even more.
2007-07-29 21:05:21 · update #1
You are 16. Its just your hormones.
Go back to school and get an education.
2007-07-29 21:01:41 · answer #1 · answered by Winne 3 · 5⤊ 0⤋
I know where you are coming from. I wanted a baby starting when I was about 14. I didn't try then, since I was saving myself until marriage. I have been trying for almost 3 years with no luck yet. It can be very depressing and there is really nothing anyone can say to make it better. usually what others see as good advice like "it will happen when its time" or "just relax and stop trying and it will happen" only make it worse. How are you ready for a baby financially at 16 though? You should really be married before trying for a baby. You are so young, and even though I know where you're coming from, you need to wait. It would be the best for you and the baby if you wait.
2007-07-29 21:16:57 · answer #2 · answered by Mr & Mrs G 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
First be prepared for a LOT of criticizem
Secound let me tell you I know how you feel.
I'm 19 and have been married for a year, my husband and I have been TTC for 10 months and still no luck.
It's recommended that you TTC for a year before seeking fertility treatments but I'm kinda wary of going to the gyno or a doctor about this because I know they will give me that "you shouldn't be trying to get pregant" look.
People don't understand, I love kids and babysit them for free whenever someone wants me to, everytime I see someone, (espically my age) with a baby or kids I almost cry it seems like I can't go hardly anywhere. People who say "your time will come" or "God will make it happen when your ready" are trying to be nice and supportive but are not helping most of them haven't EVER had trouble TTC.
All this being said, at 16 I don't know how prepared mentally, physically and financially you can be to have a child. My advice really is go to the gyno and see if you can conceive just be ready to deal with the consquences.
2007-08-02 01:53:13 · answer #3 · answered by ♥Ani♥ 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
OK you say you want a baby ! Are you 100% sure? Take a step back and think baby's don't stay baby's forever they grow and grow fast they start needing more and more from you and the father emotionally and financially your only 16 live your life for a while be young while you still have the chance maybe you should have a chat with your parents go make be friends with a single mom and help them out you said it makes you want a child more being around a baby but maybe if you offer to look after a baby and see how hard it actually is you my think twice
2007-07-30 04:09:37 · answer #4 · answered by racheal w 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I know whatever anyone answers on this you are not going to change your mind as it seems firmly made up. I think you need to sit down very carefully and have a long hard think. You may want a baby and yes it will give you someone to love but if you are going to be any sort of mother you need to look at the bigger picture. At 16 are you going to be able to give your child a 'decent' home, how will you afford a mortgage? Or are you just expecting a home off of the council? How can you support another adult? Because surprise surprise they don't stay babies!! We all love babies but that really isn't enough. If you really want to live in a council house, scrounging money from everyone you know, dressing your child in hand me downs, not being able to afford everything your child deserves then go right ahead! Obviously you will believe everyone is just having a go but you are only 16 years old and yes you may feel you are a fully grown adult but the fact you are even considering this at your age shows you are not! The fact you have been trying since you are fifteen is very scary but no doctor will investigate infertility at you age as you are not classed as fully developed and believe me I know! Go and get yourself a decent education so you can end up providing for the family you desire so much, and the rest of us paying taxes don't have to do it for you!
2007-07-29 21:22:07 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Have you not learned anything from the Maury show??? I was 16 and got pregnant. I did not have the baby, but I can tell you now, 11 years later, wating is the best thing that ever happened to me. I see plenty of girls your age having babies by accident, and they can tell you firsthand that it was the biggest mistake of their lives. How could you possibly be financially ready at 16? Do you have a good, high paying career? Have you even finished high school? How could you be mentally ready? You have barely even experienced life.
I highly suggest waiting. You have so much more time to enjoy your life before you bring another one into this world. Once it happens, it can never be changed. You will most likely regret this huge decision, and be bitter toward your child.
2007-07-30 05:36:51 · answer #6 · answered by Sarah C 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you're just looking at the PRO list when it comes to having a baby.. about how cute cuddly... and you can dress up and parade around... people will oogle the child and it'll make you feel good.. you think that the baby will give you attention....
You're not seeing the cons ie what if the baby has colic... and crys for 3 months straight... or heaven forbid is sick and needs special treatment.... or about how you just can't hop in the car anymore and go out with friends you have a baby at home... and not to mention you'll have a life commitment to this child it's not just a fad you can throw away when you're done with it!... finish your school at least make it to age of majority before you start trying for a kid.. if you're depressed you need psychotherapy not a baby to put high demands on you and stress you out more....
2007-07-29 21:08:39 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Im 16 to and my family is complletely from yung teen mothers but maybe you should talk to your boyfriend does he feel the same way about this that you do because he might not want a child right now he might have future goals before children and if you are serious about this and it is meant to be it will happen but dont take steps forward before the stairs are in front of you. Until you do have a child of your own, since you seem to enjoy the presence of babies try babysitting, ALOT more
2007-07-29 22:35:16 · answer #8 · answered by BBQ_Word2yoMama 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I understand that ache you're talking about. I've felt it too. Some women just have that maternal instinct going very early. I wish there was some way to convince you to wait.
You write well for a sixteen year old. You express yourself far better than some adults. Please finish high school at least. School gives your talents a chance to grow and be discovered. You owe it to yourself to find out what you can do. Maybe it's a blessing that you haven't gotten pregnant yet. This can be a chance for you to finish growing up and feel good about yourself for finishing school.
I hope your financial readiness does not include public assistance. It's really not fair to others to have a baby while you are not financially independent.
2007-07-29 21:29:28 · answer #9 · answered by sassy sarah 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
16 is too young to be thinking about having a baby, when i was 16 i got pregnant and even though i love my child so much now, it was a huge mistake i missed out on finshing school i couldn't go out with my friends. It's a really big responsibility to bring a child up. Anyway you still have all the time in the world to have a baby.Have fun while you can, grow up a little bit first.
2007-07-29 21:14:09 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Even though your ready, (not that i think anyone can be absolutly ready, whatever the age) when your body is ready you will get pregnant. And when you do you will know that its ment to be. Just be patient you have plenty of time. If you are worried then you MUST go to the doctor! Don't worry about them judgeing you or you feeling silly they are there to HELP YOU, and i'm sure they will have had plenty of other patients that would appear 'sillier' than you ever will! lol
The only piece of advice for someone your age is please do everything you want to do in your own life b4 you have a baby or oneday you may regret and resent your child for it. If you have then go for it.
Hope i've helped, Good luck!
2007-07-29 21:07:30 · answer #11 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋