Do you think it was perhaps Gerry who decided going out for meals without the kids was OK?

Question

And Kate wasn't really keen on the idea but he managed to convince her it was ok. Once they done it once or twice the both relaxed until that fateful night.

Kate looks racked with guilt - the worst kind too. The guilt of a mother who wasn't there when her children needed her. Whereas Gerry just looks like a man who really beleives he has done nothing wrong and it is a situation he can 'fix'.

I just get the feeling Gerry is the driving force behind the whole sorry event - before and after. Is he now trying to prove to Kate he wasn't wrong and he will get her back by flying to the States and doind all other kinds of pointless things?

Answer 1

I actually think they were talked into it by the other couples. I get the impression that Gerry McCann especially is a bit of a "wanabee". I worked out from his own Friends Reunited missives that he qualified in medicine in his 20s but couldn't get a job other than registrar until his mid-30s, so he and Kate moved to Holland so he could do some advanced courses in cardiology and become a consultant. If this is the case, he may be more of a "follower" than a "leader".

Also, bear in mind that the McCanns both come from humble, working class backgrounds. Not so some (if not all) of the people they were on holiday with.

With the others saying, "Oh, it'll be OK", especially the other couple who had two children who were even younger than the McCanns' children and also left them alone!

Peer pressure, pure and simple.

And if you think Gerry McCann isn't guilty, you're not seeing the same pictures of him as I am. He has "GUILT" emblazoned in big letters across his forehead! He won't admit it verbally or in writing, but a picture speaks a thousand words. Another pet peeve of mine. Right after Madeleine went missing, the lawyers were called in. I have no doubt whatsoever that the McCanns faced charges of neglect and the lawyers have advised them from Day One not to admit or even hint at it. All this rubbish about "naive at best", "well within the bounds of good parenting" is lawyer-speak aka "non-admission".

Answer 2

I am starting to feel sorry for the woman. Do you think there is domestic abuse in the marriage? It seems to be all "Gerry, Gerry,Gerry" whenever something new is released. Does he travel alone? If so, any one would think that Kate would tell all her side of the story! Any mother would asked about hiring babysitters for an evening without the children, or even taking the kids out with them!

Answer 3

No matter what Gerry thinks it is 100% to leave small children out of sight at any time. The man is in total denial about the whole thing. I am very glad I am not married to him. I would not like someone that is very controlling. How stupid can he get by saying he will get her back????????? What makes him so sure or maybe he does know something after all, but Madeleine in America??????? So many unanswered questions. Time will tell.

Answer 4

Well said, I also agree with anne s, lesroys too.

Im puzzled and quite fed up of reading posts by people saying "The McCanns were only a few yards away". Its a FACT that they were NOT just a few yards away. The Tapas bar was some 100 yards from thr apartment, and a view was blocked by 7 foot walls, shrubs, trees, other buildings..the McCanns had to actually walk OUTSIDE of the resort to access the Tapas bar. This was not just a one-off either..the children were left EVERY single evening. The McCanns also went to a bar called The Millenium bar and left the children, and to a bar ON THE BEACH called Chaplins, which was 800 ms away. How any parent can justify that is unbelieveble!

But even without those FACTS, it is the McCanns actions SINCE that tragic night that have turned the majority of the public off them. People say "They know theyve done wrong, and they are paying for it" but really, that is the point! They dont seem to KNOW theyve done wrong! There has never, not once been any form of apology, there has never, not once, been any form of regret or an utterance of "We made a mistake". Never!

As for the fund...SO many unanswered questions, so many distastefull comments and blogs by Gerry, so many offensive remarks by the family, is it any wonder people find it difficult to relate to the McCanns? They have hardly endeared themselves to people, and the public are now sick of the way the family are behaving.

I personally know of a Downes syndrome girl who worked hard, washing cars, doing sponsered walks etc, so she could give to the fund. She also gave half of her disability money. Because she CARED. Because she wanted to help. For MADELEINE. But when her Grandmother wrote to the fund, asking how the money is likely to be used, she got a rude, one line reply saying "If you dont agree with the fund, dont donate then!"

Its THAT attitude that speaks volumes, and does this family no favours.

They let their Daughter down, and I hope she is at peace. The "backlash" they have had since then though, is all their own doing.

Answer 5

From a mother's point of view, I would never ever be convinced that it would be OK to leave my son alone in an unlocked apartment in order to go out for a meal. I really do have trouble trying to understand how some people actually think it is ok to do so!

My son is eleven now, and even at that age, we would never leave him indoors alone, not even for five mins when i pop to the local shops, I would be racked with guilt, what if there was a fire, or if some weirdo broke in? Its just too risky.

Answer 6

Gerry is basking in the limelight. I am sure there is more that we don't know, it's all too strange for words, especially the fact that their story has changed so much. Hope the British police will interrogate them and get to the bottom of it. I can't help thinking that the most obvious place to look for Madeleine (or her body) is in the locality she was taken from. If I was a parent in that situation I would be scouring the countryside in Portugal not jetting off around the world.

Answer 7

Eminent Consultant Surgeon marries lowly GP of course Kate's lucky to be married to him or at least that is what he most likely portrays. Kate is like a puppy dog around him his word is law and she is the back seat passenger in the marriage. However, if you scratched beneath the surface I bet it is her who does the harder job and makes more decisions. You can bet she never gets any credit in the marriage, how do I know I was once a Kate myself. I left my marriage when I was pregnant I wanted to give my son the best in life. I woke up. Kate is probably scared to stand up to him having been downtrodden for years. Gerry McCann is a wannabe. All he is interested in is himself and his ego. A lot of surgeons are brilliant at their jobs but have huge egos. I suspect GM is one of those types. Kate will hang on to GM for all she is worth. She's too scared to do anything else or feels her world will fall apart. Why on earth does she leave her children from 9am till 7pm every day in a creche. They are two years old for goodness sake they are too young to be at school. Why because GM wants her all to himself at her beck and call 24 hours a day to soothe his ego. Thats the relationship they have. She should get some backbone and put her remaining children first. When you are in a relationship that is controlling you can't see a future away from the control freak. But the moment you step outside the relationship the world changes and you can see that it was unhealthy. Once you realise you can control your own life you become strong stronger than you ever thought possible and you see the control freak as a weak person who you don't want near you. Lets hope Kate does step outside and see life from another perspective. I feel sorry for the twins at the moment. You let Maddie down Kate - don't let your other babies down to.

Answer 8

Heather I thought this yesterday looking at some pics but I wasn't brave enough to ask the Q. You see those comments (I think Gerry's mum) about how these kind of things can split couples up . . . but not them. It got me wondering if she will ever turn and blame him. She does as you say, look far more guilt ridden and broken than he does. Though I guess there could be many reasons for that . . . ?

Answer 9

If it was a once-off thing, I might be inclined to agree with you, you know, the babysitter can't make it tonight, the kids are fast asleep, will we risk it for an hour or two.... that would be bad enough...
BUT, it wasn't a once-off, it was every night, so both had a chance to reflect and reconsider their actions, and spend five minutes and a couple of quid organising proper care for the subsequent nights.
Nah, I don't buy it, they're both as bad as each other.

Answer 10

Kate is definately "bullied" by Gerry and does as he wishes, but, wher the safety of our children are concerned, that is really no excuse. If I tried at any point to talk my Wife into neglecting our children, I would be facing a divorce and a black eye, Im certain!