Me and my wife been seperated almost 9 months and she's been gone. i hear she's going to back to town to get an attorney and start divorce proceedings. deep in my heart i want her back and have the deepest apologies for her. she left not because of me cheating or running around, but just being very negative that i can't land a good career and my negativity i guess drove her away. any help would be appreciated.
Or should i throw in the towel and be done with it?
2007-07-28 05:27:24 · 12 answers · asked by olds_alero2000 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Be done with it.
Stay single and live a happy life.
Marriage screws up way too many people's lives.
That's why the divorce rate is so unbelievably high, marriages are disposable these days.
2007-07-28 06:19:25 · answer #1 · answered by Mr R 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, a woman doesn't usually leave a man for one single reason (except cheating)--it's based on things that have built up for a long time. Not landing a good career (job) isn't the real problem--it's how you dealt with it. You're right on that account. She probably has lost so much respect for you that she can't go on being married.
I don't want to beat you up, here. But I'm guessing that whatever you've been doing to find a job isn't what works in a difficulty economy. Have you tried networking, taking classes at government funded places where they teach you resume' building and interview skills, or even hook you up with job training? You sound as if you need a coach.
Going through the want ads and making a couple of calls won't find you anything worth having these days.
Are there other interests in your life that took precedence over your marriage? Hanging out with friends? Hobbies?
After all, your user name references a seven-year-old American car that's no longer manufactured. Most people pick a user name that means something. That kind of worries me.
If you want to win this woman back, you have to fix what's wrong--make some smart choices and examine your true priorities. If you can't or won't, then you'll lose her, dude.
2007-07-28 05:51:34 · answer #2 · answered by Cluny Brown 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you're "hearing" thru the grapevine and she's not actually contacted you, sounds like she might have only the divorce in mind. After 9 months and there has been no communication between the 2 of you, chances are she has someone else.
There's always hope though, and a call to her couldn't hurt. Then you would know for sure. If nothing else, you can let her know your feelings and move towards resolving your issues. Sometimes apologies fix things and sometimes they don't, but maybe you could feel better about the situation.
Good Luck and I hope things work out for you!
2007-07-28 05:41:21 · answer #3 · answered by justme 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
There is only so much negativity a person can take. Was any of that negativity directed at her? Did you make her feel bad because you couldn't find a career? If so, you asked for it. She sounds set on divorce. I would talk with her. See if you can't find at least a common ground to retain a friendship. Who knows? You may get to date her all over again.
2007-07-28 05:39:11 · answer #4 · answered by magix151 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Are you even sure why she's gone? You said you guess your negativity drove her away. If you're not sure, how can you possibly work on getting her back? You need to know what you're trying to change.
I'd say fight for your marriage. There's no sense in ending things when they could very well be worked out, especially if there are children involved. Try your best to make it work.
2007-07-28 05:39:32 · answer #5 · answered by MaknMeCrzy 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
ask her if she is willing to go through marriage bootcamp or somthing like that. Tell her how you feel and explain what you would like to happen. Tell her to think about US and if she has the slightest love for you she will come back. Hubby and I seperated for a month and he came to me and asked for another chance for us. I took it b/c I love him so much. It will be hard work but if you really love her and want it to work go through with it. IF you have any doubt that you will cheat again...just move on. Good Luck
2007-07-28 07:08:38 · answer #6 · answered by ? 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My advice? Throw in the towel. Close that book.
It rarely works out. And I gathere you haven't had any dramatic changest. A lost cause.
Get your life going and meet new people. The job market is the hardest to crack open at the level you want to be .
2007-07-28 07:09:22 · answer #7 · answered by reinformer 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Be careful how you approach her. Show her you best side. Take a very positive approach and see what happens. I f she has already made her mind up, accept it and go on with your life, There is a soul mate for you somewhere, Stay Positive. God Bless
2007-07-28 06:17:40 · answer #8 · answered by ohioaim 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
YOU ARE ALREADY SOUNDING NEGATIVE- SORRY, THE TRUTH HURTS @ TIMES. BE PREPARED FOR THE DIVORCE PAPERS. THAT WILL HELP U IN THE LONG RUN. GOOD LUCK!
2007-07-28 05:45:04 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hate to tell you this but it's over, you will not get her back. You need to get your stuff together here and move on.
2007-07-28 05:36:32 · answer #10 · answered by kim t 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋