Why won't my parents let me wear a bikini???

Question

So recently my friend Dan invited a bunch of us to his house for a pool party. I don't swim a lot, so I needed to get a bathing suit. My mom couldn't take me, so she said to just go buy one by myself.
I bought a plain, black halter bikini which I don't think is too revealing.
Here it is: http://www.ae.com/web/browse/product.jsp?catId=cat90090&productId=0461_2077_teal

And the bottoms are underneath it, just simple bikini bottoms.

But I showed my Mom the swimsuit and she flipped out! She said it wasn't appropraite for someone my age to wear a bikini (I'm 15) and I have no idea why! All my other friends have been wearing them since they were 10!

I really just want to wear this bikini- all my other friends will be wearing them. :( I guess it's peer pressure, but I don't want to be left out. Also, I hate tankinis so please don't suggest that (it feels weird to have that empty spot between your stomach and tankini bottom).

How can I to convice my Mom to let me wear it?

Also, the party is next Friday.

I could always just wear the swimsuit underneath my regular clothes, but I don't want to lie.

Answer 1

As a mother of girls here's what I think. I believe it's more about your mother seeing you in the suit in and going WOW my little girl is growing up. While logically she's known it all along, it might have been one of those light bulb moments for her.

As mothers we see the changes you go through in a gradual way until one day it just hits us that your no longer a baby anymore.

Maybe ask your mom to sit down and explain to her that you really like the suit and what about it makes you feel good. Her initial reaction may have been from shock.

If she still says she doesn't want you to wear the suit don't lie do whats right and ask her to help you pick one out that you both like. Make it a mom daughter shopping day. You'll feel better and so will she.

Good Luck to you and remember even if you don't believe it it's just as hard for a mother to watch her daughter grow into a woman as it is for you yourself to grow into one.

Blessings to you

Answer 2

Hmm I can understand how your mother feels, Although it is a nice swim suit the bottoms look to be really low and the top seems okay to me. Hey if I we're you just tell your mom you took the swim suit back go buy an extremely cheap one piece, where the two piece under your clothes make sure it's not visible when you leave make sure your mom See's you pack the one piece and just go. You Only live once and sometimes what mom doesn't know won't hurt her and something as simple as a swim suit won't hurt her just make her a little angry if she found out later but there's not much she can do about something if it has happened.

Answer 3

Well the bottom line is your parents are your parents and until you can afford to either buy your own clothes or move out of their house you must abide by their rules. Chances are it is more your Dad than your mom who doesn't want you to wear the bikini. Who really cares what your other friends are wearing? If it bothers you that much that your parents won't let you wear the bikini you bought, ask them why she feels it isn't appropriate for you to wear it. Maybe suggest you get one of those coverall skirts to wear over the bottoms or maybe get a different bikini that doesn't show as much cleavage. Like on of those tube top ones. If they really don't want you to wear one because your middrift will be showing than you are pretty much out of solutions. You can either abbide by their rules or take your chances lying about wearing it. But don't be surprised if when you're caught they decide you cannot attend any kind of party. good Luck :)

Answer 4

My parents would not care if I wore a bikini to the pool or anything but maybe at a boy girl pool party they would mind just try telling them that its not revealing and that bikinis are usually worn to the pool by everybody or also try buying a bottom with short shorts or a skirt instead of what you have now they cover more up but still look good alot of my friends were them my sis has worn a binini from age 4 its not a big deal

Answer 5

I don't know how curvy and girly girl you figure is developing. If you have grown and look older than your age than that may be here worry. Guys will defenitely love you at the party. They will defenitely try seomthing with you at the party if you reveal a lot of skin.
I know, I was a jerk in high school. I was one of those guys who would go after the "hottie" saying and doing anything to get her in bed. Just be careful and don't give in to peer pressure.
It's funny how you want to establish independence from your parents as your own person but are willing to follow the crowd and not be different.

Answer 6

Remember that your parents have known you your entire life, so even at age 15, they're going to have a hard time ever letting go of the little girl that you used to be.
Take comfort in knowing that right or wrong, they care about you. So many young people don't have that feeling.
You did an excellent job explaining the situation here. Why not just show them this question? You made your case very well.
Good luck.

Answer 7

I don't know why she would think it's not appropriate, 1 year olds wear bikinis. Tell her why you think it's not inappropriate and ask her why she thinks it is, then try to come to a resolution. Like, you can wear the bikini but you have to wear shorts with it or something. I think your mother is being unreasonable, so you really need to talk to her. If all else fails, wear it anyway, because they really don't sell any good 1 piece bathing suits unless it's a lifeguard one, those are kinda cool.

Answer 8

parents respond well when you show that your mature, so whatever you do don't go in a strop, that won't work. and don't ask over and over, she will not get sick and give in, that hardly ever works.

tell her that although there will be boys at the party, that these are your friends, and that you don't think of them that way, if it helps tell your mother that they all already have girlfriends and are not interested in you. tell her that you would feel comfortable in a bikini, and that you would feel far to young if you wore a one piece.

say that you respect her wishes, but you like the bikini and she should trust you enough to look after yourself. tell her that it hurts you to think that she thinks you will get up to stuff.

you might not change her mind. but don't worry about it, your friends won't think any less of you. and you can spend the first half hour of the party bitching about your mother.

good luck
xxx

(and its a nice bikini by the way)

Answer 9

I think that is a little unfair. It's just a swimsuit! But why don't you just try maybe a tankini, a bikini with a longer top! And wear swim shorts over the bottoms.


Victoria's Secret has some really cute tankinis!

Answer 10

Let me answer you as a man, also as a father.
NOBODY will think you're old fashioned for not wearing a bikini. Wearing a ONE piece swimming suit is now in Europe considered "chique" (that is French for... upper social class... for fashionable... the in thing). -- Secondly, you are old enough already to understand that bikinis turn men on and so NOT THE THING I would like my 15-year old daughter doing by a swimming pool. We know that your purpose to wear a bikini is to be LIKE YOUR FRIENDS or at least not to be different from your friends... or fear of being laughed at or criticized or ridiculed. Trust me. You won't be. Please do what your Mom asks. I am a father with 3 daughters and I would do the same as your Mom. -- Let me try to convince you why you will not be ridiculed by your friends. The less you show to boys the more interested they will be in you. -- I would allow my daughters wearing bikinis near me and my wife but if they are going out with their friends, then no way. Besides, after awhile none of your friends will pay any notice whether you're wearing a bikini or a one piece swimming suit.
My wife and I fished these out of the internet. You should know that Brazil are the leaders in fashionable swimming wear so tell me if the swimming suits below are old fashioned. Try the link
http://images.google.com/imgres?imgurl=http://lib.store.yahoo.net/lib/babybrazil/M0520-One-Piece-Swimsuit-White-O-L.jpg&imgrefurl=http://babybrazil.com/one-piece-pageant-swim-suit.html&h=400&w=250&sz=119&hl=en&start=0&um=1&tbnid=NaV4OU5iLxIv7M:&tbnh=124&tbnw=78&prev=/images%3Fq%3Done%2Bpiece%2Bswimming%2Bsuits%26svnum%3D10%26um%3D1%26hl%3Den%26safe%3Doff%26rlz%3D1B3GGGL_enGB233GB233%26sa%3DN