I have known of my husband cheating on me & forgave him 4 our family sake. and financila reasons Now he is jumping through hoops for me but I am not convinced I also know that he had done it once before. I found out about this in October One relationship lasted a year the last one almost 3 yrs.. I have decided to stay because I don't want to lose face & our boys(2) he tells me that he loves me. But now 9 months later I know he is seeing a diffrent one. he is the type that uses woman to get what he wants at work. So now do I look the other way or what should I do. i have no proof of this last one she is some one I know she comes by his office all the time with the excuse of them working together. she comes by late in the afternoon then once everyone leaves the office they are alone for 2 hours. How would you ladies get proof? I mean she is all over him on the daily calling him leaving messages of course i told him to let it go and he says how can he do that this is his income.
2007-07-27 19:07:30 · 12 answers · asked by Sandy 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
To answer Ajai He is a loan officer & she works for a diffrent company but she gives him leads from her office so she supposedly comes by almost everyday. Last week he had told me he was leaving the office and I drove by only to see his car & hers there I saw them coming out of the office I got so nervous & hid then I questioned him he just said that they were talking about his loans. & when I told him that I don't like it he said that she is the only one giving him work but I don't know weather or not to believe him he also says she is married & that she is not that attractive so who knows I don't know what to believe anymore
2007-07-27 19:41:07 · update #1
i am.a. male. if he has done this in the past and you worked it out seem.s like he has never stopped doing it and he wont he just got. more sneaker on doing this i am not joking on this matter i really feal sorry for you as well your children , him i dont you might want to do as i am typing to you on this matter. put a recorder in his office and get a .12. hour tape so it wont stop and look at his calls in the phone bill and put a recorder on his line there are many ways to do it and are very legal a small mic. in his phone it cant be decated but it will record him no matter the distance you can buy this at a store that sells products on homming divices. he as well her cant deny there own coice now can they . my opion?
2007-07-27 19:22:10 · answer #1 · answered by the_silverfoxx 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
did you not give him enough pu$$y? there is no excuse for cheating. not getting any sex, I can almost see that. but even that is not reason enough. I dont know, thats a tuffy, you can look at it 2 different ways, most men do need sex, quite alot, I know I do. and in the old testaments, a lot of men had many wive's and many concubines, they where extra sexual partners, for when the wive's where on their periods[hebrews will not touch a woman on her period], and in the last days of pregnancy, and first few days after as well. But with todays women thinking they know it all, and they are equal to men, and all that idiotic BS. if a man goes and takes care of what the lil wifey aint taken care of [with someone else] then the man is made out to be the bad guy. as usual women are always right, and oh god forbid we should ever let them know how ignorant they really are. oh and by the way that pu$$y aint lined in gold.
2007-07-28 02:29:35 · answer #2 · answered by samuraijsp 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
How can you put up with that behavior,how can you look the other way and how can you let him touch you.I'm sorry but no excuse is good enough to live with a man that has no respect for you.You love your husband can you see yourself having sex with another man so how can he say he loves you and have sex with someone else.You let him get away with it the first time and you did nothing so why should he stop he knows you are not going anywhere and besides all he has to do is cry.
2007-07-28 02:22:29 · answer #3 · answered by Teenie 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
What is the situation exactly....are they colleagues or she is his boss,I dont get it sorry.....If I was you I would try to get this woman out of the office by herself and just ask her what she is doing with your husband??? Does she know he is married,maybe he is vague about it on office-ground?Put her straight asap and ofcourse set some strict rules for hubby and if he doesnt obey then threaten him with a divorce and a severe maintenance to look forward to...Deep down you gotta ask yourself do you wanna spend rest of marriage -life full of uncertainties,doubts etc.about hubbies faithfulness....you wont know for sure,NEVER but you been there before so you will KNOW the signs,right.Also never think you are losing face towards your sons,its NOT your fault he is willing to risk family-life and fool around for selfish pleasure...later on you will explain to them......I think this life is very stressful for you so maybe you could be happier just with your twins,goodluck
2007-07-28 02:22:26 · answer #4 · answered by ajal 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well...let's look at worst case scenario, that he is boinking this one too.
Would you react differently this time? Honestly...or would you confront him, fight, etc., and still forgive him?
It seems to me that you have an open marriage, and there's nothing you can do about it unless you leave...
or, you could get a bf yourself. I really wonder how your husband would feel if the tables were turned. You might find yourself a young sensitive guy...I suggest this not because I am for open marriages, but your desire for monogamy seems a losing battle--no, a LOST battle.
2007-07-28 02:35:01 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Playing the income card huh. Make appointments with three different divorce lawyers. Leave ther business cards laying about the house for hubby to find. If that doesn't wake him up...choose one of the attorneys and file that divorce.
2007-07-28 02:33:07 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Mercy, that is a bad situation.
If he does not want to stay faithful to you, theres not
anything you can do about it but move on with your
life. His lose, your Gain. It is sad, there are some
people like that.
Best of luck to you, God bless.
2007-07-28 02:20:22 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
you get a divorce attorney, let him worry about the proof.
If his income is so great, the attorney will get proof.
Call an attorney, asap and tell them what's going on.
They may ask you to save the messages or what ever.
Get the hell out of there.
2007-07-28 02:15:27 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
how can you lose face he is the one cheating , dump him he is not going to change i know this i had a cheating wife the kids will understand some day life is to short to be unhappy move on with it you deserve to be happy
2007-07-28 02:18:30 · answer #9 · answered by rthroener 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
a lot of things. It will depend on your and his personality. Also, if it's a boss he might actually, sounds strange but true, be being raped(coerced through financial threat). Try your best to tell no one, because you will lose their respect.
2007-07-28 02:19:37 · answer #10 · answered by jrie67 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋