How to trust?

Question

What if you were decieved by the person you trusted (and loved) most?

Answer 1

It's happened to me more than once. I tend to trust everyone and expect the same back. Unfortunately this leaves you open to deciept. I won't change who or what I am. If I get decieved they loose my trust. It's their loss.

Answer 2

It's happened before, and I'm sure it will happen again.

I guess when decieved I look for signs that they are sorry and take it from there. No two deceits are the same ... and the fix's can be difficult.

The basic principals are:
* Deceiver has contrite heart.
* Deceiver asks (out loud) for forgivness.
* You then get to give them "penance" or a way to make it up to you.
* Then you both need to work out how it went wrong, what to look for so it won't happen again, and lay out what the next "Penance" is if they biff it again.

You have to stick with the next penance or else they will walk all over you like a rug.

Answer 3

It happens to everyone. Don't get synical about it. The truth is that it's only the one's you trust that can truly decieve you and it's only the one's that you care about that can truly hurt you.
And quite frankly, it will probably happen again. But whatever doesn't kill you only makes you stronger. You'll feel down, and sad. But at the end of the day, learn from it and move on to make your own life better.
Life goes on. Don't let your past haunt your present and ruin your future. You're suppose to learn from it and make it even better.
Listen to that Dixie Chicks song...I don't know what it's called. But it's something about forgive but don't forget.

Answer 4

Someone told me a long time ago, trust people the way you want to be trusted. I think that is still good advice.
We can blame others for not living up to our expectations but if we want to ever be happy we must own our feelings. As long as we look to blame others for our disappointments we will remain "victims".
It may take courage to trust again but the alternatives will only isolate you.

Answer 5

Trust no one, trust only God & yourself. History alway repeat, even parent, spouse ... they can decieve you.

Answer 6

Hi Philisopheyes,
Trust in oneself, usually equates to trusting others.. unless they show you some good reason not to trust them....
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Once it's "lost", it can be very difficult to get back....!
Take the step of trusting them on smaller things first, then work your way up to important things....
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Being able, to take someone at their word without hesitation....
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Through their Actions not just words, YOU can earn, it...
Being able, to put yourself completely in the hands of another without fear....
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If you are talking about trust in : "Feelings"...
If your thinking of "intuition", then yes.... Quite often, that nagging little voice in your head is telling you something.... "listen" to that for sure....
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Every time, I didn't listen to myself.. then I got myself into hotter water, than if I did what it was telling me to do or not do... in the first place.....
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Feelings are just that.... They are : "yours", and not "right" or "wrong" .... People feel different about various things and the opposite sex is a major one (or same sex, if your of that persuasion) ... Again nothing is absolutely right or wrong, it just is what you feel....
Follow the feelings, with your "intuition"... and you will have fewer problems with dealing with people and your life..... :)
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I hope this helps!
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Thanks, for the question! :)

My regards!

Take care!

Answer 7

I try to trust myself first and foremost - to be able to handle whatever happens. In other words, I try to hold myself the most accountable and not others around me. I cant control what they do or don't do but I can (most of the time) control my ability to handle whatever they do or don't do. afterall, i am the one ultimately responsible for my own happiness not them.

Answer 8

THEN YOU FORGIVE BUT NOT FORGET.

You cant live your life not trusting people. Yes you take it slow the next time around but dont be bitter about it. It will eat at you and eat at you.

Best wishes godbless