2007-07-27 09:27:46 · 11 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Oh yes, it does get easier. When you get to the point of not loving him, it is very liberating. In the beginning when you first separate it is gut wrenching, you feel dead inside. You go through all kinds of emotions....its a roller coaster to say the least. Day by day, allow yourself to feel all the emotions...its a process we all have been through and most of us make it out the other side a lot healthier and stronger for the experience. When I first separated from my husband it was the worst day of my life. He did some terrible things while we were married, but it didnt take away the love I felt for him. I never thought I could love again, let alone be with another man. He was it for me, the love of my life, the only man I could ever trully love........I thought. That was then, this is now and I know he wasnt the love of my life. I have moved on.....I expect more for myself now. What I thought would never happen, happened when I least expected it. I had done my grieving....I became strong and I fell in love with a real man this time.....a man who would never hurt me.....a man who loves me as much as I love him.....its a wonderful feeling. But you know the best thing about this whole situation? Four years ago my ex husband wanted to come back....he claimed he had never stopped loving me. I believed he was sincere....I believe he changed......but I had changed....I did my grieving, I became strong and I realised I didnt love him anymore.....thats the best part.....I genuinely didnt love him anymore, and I never thought that could happen. I realised I didnt define myself anymore by the man I was with.....I was an individual.....a strong one at that and I thank my ex for doing what he did in our marriage because if he didnt, I wouldnt be the confident person I am today and I certainly would not have met the real love of my life. Day by day......you will get there.
2007-07-27 09:44:08 · answer #1 · answered by rightio 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't think it's so much as gets easier as it's accepting your new relationship. I seperated after 10 years a year ago. I filed divorce in April. I don't think it's easier. We both have been dating other people and it's still hard. We seem to still go back to one another and the chemistry is better than ever. On the same hand we both know we can't be married to each other. Do I still love him, yes. Has it lessened? No, it's grown. All in all, find how to deal with your new relationship and stop relying on the other so much. You know, breaking old habits.
2007-07-27 17:08:51 · answer #2 · answered by clever4one 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
With some counseling, yes. You love what you have as an image of him, not what he became... And when you realize that those two people are not the same, you'll be able to move on. Hon, life is toooo lovely, and a special person in your life to share with tooo nice to groan away and grind away attempting to make something that will never be again. If you have tried counseling, and your problems are "irreconcilable" admit it, and get on with your life
Try Yahoo Personals, Match.com and a dozen other sites.... Nice people there, and you can let the computer pre-sort them.
2007-07-27 16:41:00 · answer #3 · answered by April 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No it doesn't. Does your spouse feel the same. How long? have you been seperated. Have you gone to therapy together? Have you been recently? Never know god works in mysterious ways. If you left and you still love her work things out in counseling if shes the one that left then talk with her about seeing someone. If you love her than maybe it will all work out. Thats too many years for it not to.
2007-07-27 16:32:18 · answer #4 · answered by youcandoit 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes, it will get easier but because you still love that person it will take time and effort. Effort means trying to be happy with the life you have and doing things that make you happy, counting your blessings and being with loved ones. Time will help tremendously but in the meantime tell yourself that you deserve someone who loves you as much as you love them. Someday you will have that!
2007-07-27 21:59:13 · answer #5 · answered by mab5096 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i think in the beginning the time apart will be the hardest and then you'll adjust to life without his presence all the time and the reflection period comes in that will allow you to think a bit clearer and start planning towards your future without him. good luck
2007-07-27 16:32:08 · answer #6 · answered by Angie 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes, the pain goes away. Or at least diminishes. Focus on yourself and your new life.
2007-07-27 16:31:45 · answer #7 · answered by eharrah1 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes. It simply takes time. Sometimes lots of time. I hope it goes fast for you!
2007-07-27 16:34:07 · answer #8 · answered by leysarob 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Only when YOU decide to accept it. + Take the full step. If you're not divorced, that may be why you're not getting on with your life....for YOU!
2007-07-27 16:38:29 · answer #9 · answered by iyamacog 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes. Can you love someone else too.
2007-07-27 16:31:35 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋