He doesn't have weird phone calls or anything like that, but I don't know, there is something I can not put my finger on. Does guilt make a spouse act differant? I just feel something with him is not right.
2007-07-27 09:20:48 · 12 answers · asked by juggalizzle 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Mindless you are a retard! Ever think maybe I am the one who wants it more than I am getting it?
2007-07-30 02:27:07 · update #1
All you can really do is keep you eyes open and observe. Human intuition can be wrong so don't do anything that might be a mistake.
2007-07-27 10:48:30 · answer #1 · answered by snack_daddy10 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, your intuition is usually a good indicator. If he's gone a lot and has weak excuses about where he's been, that's not a good sign. Also, has he been drifting away from you emotionally; can you still have a deep conversation with him and hold his attention? Does he still show concern for you?
Guilt will usually make him pull away emotionally, or will make him go the complete opposite way and get you expensive presents for no apparent reason.
I don't usually recommend this, but if he's cheating, both your physical and emotional health are in jeopardy, so have you considered looking through his emails? I know this is intrusive, but a lot of "dates" are now arranged via email, because it's more difficult to trace. You can also call his cell phone company and ask them to send you an itemized copy of his most recent phone bill. Look for long conversations with unfamiliar numbers, or phone calls that take place at inappropriate hours. I did this with my ex, because my intuition was telling me something was wrong. I called the numbers that were suspicious and flat out asked the person on the other end what was going on. Turns out my ex was trying to solicit dates by telling these women that his long-term girlfriend recently died! I realized it was definitely time to dump him when he's telling people I'm dead.
2007-07-27 16:32:49 · answer #2 · answered by Jessica A 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You're probably right--something is amiss. Most of the respondents here presume you're talking about infidelity, which you may be. There could be a number of issues from work (a threatening boss) to an ex-girlfriend (stalking out of his past) to taking a bad hit on his 401(k).
Do you foster a home environment that makes him feel totally safe? Can he come home to you and say, "Some gal made a pass at me today and I was tempted for a moment"? If your response is "Quit your job you can't work there I don't want you to see the ***** again," you guys are doomed. If your response is, "Let dinner burn, I want to make you forget her" as you drop to your knees there is hope.
If it's a work problem, do you tell him, "Honey I totally support you and maybe it's time you looked for something else"? Or do you say, "You're no good, you're not earning enough"? If a man doesn't feel supported, he'll clam up and you'll loose him in that area of your relationship.
Should he have taken a financial hit, be supportive in that as well. Remember the size of the estate each one leaves when we die is different--but the percentage left is always the same: 100%. You won't take it with you and unless you're well advanced in years, there's almost always a way to get it back.
2007-07-27 17:44:27 · answer #3 · answered by Indy Gentleman 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yep, always trust your intuition, we have it for a reason. Its mostly always right. Guilt does make someone act different and we can pick up on the subtlest things. Keep an eye on him, it'll come out.
2007-07-27 16:25:15 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Usually when a spouse is overly-nice to you and does things he or she dosen't nomally do, they are hiding something and the guilt takes over. No this from experience. Good luck...trust your gut all the time!
2007-07-27 16:25:25 · answer #5 · answered by Get Even Steven 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
it could be anything. I would not waste emotional energy assuming anything. Get him to talk or get him to counseling. Assuming will not do you any good, and if he hasn't done anything and especially if you are to blame in his mind AND you accuse him... you will be lucky if he stays in love with you... at least as much a level of love as you would be comfortable staying married to.
It never ceases to amaze me how much women think about and worry about infidelity but the VERY THING that would keep the odds in their favor ( a lot of really good sex) is the last thing you want to do. I may be assuming too much here, but I would bet that you don't have the kind of and amount of sex he wants.
DO NOT assume that because he hasn't said anything about being dissatisfied in bed or that you may be totally satisfied means anything.
Be prepared to be asked to have more or more wild sex.
It's funny that women will do anything to save their marriage except this one thing.
Oh well, the few women who get this are the winners!
2007-07-27 17:03:34 · answer #6 · answered by Mindlessfun 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
It is called your intuition. You have it for a reason. Is he gone from home more often then he use to be? Has he changed his appearance? Does he focus more on how he looks or smells? Has he lost weight? Is he emotionally withdrawing from you? These all could be signs that something is going on.
2007-07-27 16:25:47 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I really hate to admit this.....but in my experience, women are pretty damn good at picking up on things like that. They term "women's intuition" wasn't made up for no reason.
2007-07-27 16:33:38 · answer #8 · answered by Insanity 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I dont know about you, but my gut is usually right. But I wouldn't ruin a marriage over it
2007-07-27 16:24:21 · answer #9 · answered by chip t 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
a new hair cut, a new wardrobe, the way he's more confident, staying later and later at work, always checking his phone..
2007-07-27 16:25:16 · answer #10 · answered by DearAbby2 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋