all you people are so bent on divorse or leaving your mate .?

Question

has any of you been so much in love that leaving or divorse isnt an option, you call someone insecure or desperate if they love someone so much they cant see spending there life without that person, that is me I feel sorry for all those people that think you should divorse or give up the love of there life,
for something the other did wrong, A mistake, I have been married 35 years to the same woman she has made mistakes and I forgave her, I have to say I am very happy, put away your pride and look around, nobody is perfect, are they?

Yes my wife cheated on me, I could have givin up and left her, someone said there is no such thing as unconditional love I have to dissagree because I have it, and if i would have left her, where would i be? I am very happy now thank you very much!

I dont understand why some of you get upset and lash out at someone who ask a question, of corse every situation is not the same I didnt say you should be abused hit on allmost killed, that would be ignorant I said mistakes, maybe you should look at your self, if your so angree at everyone get some anger managent.

Answer 1

I totally agree with you, but the problem is that people now see divorce as a solution with the first problem their marriage encounters.

I always say that marriage is about patience, forgiveness and compromise. Once you have included all these things in your marriage you can pretty much deal with problems that come your way.

I also think that people now get married thinking that marriage is perfect and there are no problems....

I think that one of the only things that does not have remidy in a marriage is verbal or physical violance.

Answer 2

Nobody is perfect. And not all situations warrant a divorce or abandonment of Love. But if you are in love with someone that abuses you and doesn't treat you like you deserve then don't you think they should find something better? I had a girlfriend once that cleared out my bank account and moved across the country with my brother...i loved her very much should i forgive her and take her back now that she wants to come back? Im thinking not. Every situation differs, if you can work things out because of some small mistake then hey thats great, but sometimes its better to cut your losses and start the healing process in order to get into a better move healthy relationship.

Answer 3

Sometimes people do things that you can't get past, no matter how much you want to. It's not just about forgiving a mistake. My husband physically HURT me. NOBODY deserves to be treated that way, and you don't give second chances when it comes to your personal safety.
Get off your high horse, it's not about being perfect, it's about not allowing people to treat you badly.
Sure, a lot of people take divorce as the easy way out, but you can't lump everybody into one category because you make yourself look stupid.
I don't, and NEVER will feel sorry for getting a divorce. Hitting someone is NOT a mistake, and I respect myself too much to allow that type of behavior to escalate. Actions have consequences, and hitting someone can't be an exception to that.

Answer 4

Well said but you are not in others shoes. There probably isn't domestic violence in your marriage or alcoholism or constant lies &/or messing around it's good you worked things out but some just can not! Why do you think they invented divorce in the first place. It's not easy for anyone to divorce but in realtionships sometimes you have to move on for the better for their children or their lives.

I agree SOME people may give up too easy but there is that % that really need a divorce and it can't be over looked.

Answer 5

Well bravo for you. Unfortunatley there are many people out there who dont have mates that simply made a few mistakes. I dont call abuse etc a mistake. If you cannot make the distinction then i would say the real kudos belong to the woman who has been able to stay by your side this long.....

Answer 6

you know sometimes the mistake was the marriage and there are some very strong reasons to get out. i am in the middle of a divorce and i really do not beleive in divorce but my husband was awful, usedto beat me so bad he almost killed me a couple of times and i am pretty sure he was sleeping around, when we got married though i really did love hime and i thought it would last so maybe sometimes there are good reasons to leave the marriage. you are lucky there are some mistakes you just can't forgive or even get over without mnassive amounts of therapy.

Answer 7

That is true no one is perfect, and as humans we all make mistakes, all can be forgiven! But ever hear the saying, fool me once shame on you, fool me twice shame on me?!! People have the right to decide they aren't going to deal with certain situations any longer. If it is abuse, cheating ect. How many chances should someone get when they make the same mistakes over and over?? And would someone that really loves you do that to you?? NO!!

Answer 8

All people make mistakes, but some aren't worth forgiving. Someone who disrespects me is probably not someone who loves me, therefore why should I keep them around?

Divorce isn't to be taken lightly...but I know I don't need or want a parnter so badly that I'd tolerate every type of behavior from them. My love for them ends when they show me they have little or no love and respect for me.

Answer 9

Well, I'm not insecure, or so very desperate I need someone else in my life I'm going through a divorce after well right now it's 33 years of marriage, this has been in the court system for two years, and I do not need someone in my life who physically and mentally abuses me thank you!!! He was the love of my life, now he's the pain in my butt!!!!

Answer 10

would you have forgiven her if she had a coke habit and lost 3 jobs in a year while being a doting wife and mother? Not trying to be sarcastic, i'd really like to know b/c I respect your marriage of 35 yrs and this is what i'm going through