15 & pregnant...my story still continues...and again in more help and advice...?

Question

okay so im 15 years old and pregnant. most of you who read all of my other questions pretty much know my entire life in the past 6 weeks. in my last question..i told everyone that i was going to planned parenthood to make my family and everyone happy to get a medical abortion..but when i got there i said i was going to tell them that i didnt want to do it after they did the ultrasound.
well i told them i wasnt ready for the abortion.. and as soon as i told my boyfriend he was so pissed and he told his mom and she was pissed..his mom told my mom..who was furious and told me to go back to planned parenthood and take the pill or dont come back home unless im packing to leave. this all happened yesterday which was me and my boyfriends 11 month anniversary. i spent the rest of the day at his house wanting to cry. my mom was stupid and told my older and younger sister what happened and they call me on the phone crying about how im being selfish and that its not all about me...but so far..

..everyone has only been making it about themselves and what they want me to do with MY body. so i said to my sisters that this was more about me than anyone else and that no one can even understand what im going through even if they say that they do. they dont understand what it feels like to have something growing inside of you that could be born and have like your eyes or something..they dont understand what it feels like to be kicked out of your own house just because your trying to save or protect a life. they just dont know. my older sister started telling me that im guna get sick because im to small to be carrying a baby and she kept saying that i would die if i went through with the pregnancy and she was just making me feel worse. on top of that my boyfreinds mom kept saying if i had it that it would just be born retarded or deformed because i took the morning after pill which didnt work and my mom made me drink pennyroyal tea to make me get my period..

..but the pill said it doesnt mess with the baby its just supposed ot make your uterus slippery so it cant implant..and the tea is supposed to make me contract so i get my period..

my question is..if i had this baby..could it really turn out like that?
and could i really die from going through with this pregnancy.. im 5'3 and i weigh 118 or something..maybe 120 now because ive been feeling fatter and havent checked my weight in a while. but im not bone skinny..but im not overweight...is it really dangerous?

p.s: im not looking for people scolding me for being pregnant. you will understand if you read all of my other questions.

Answer 1

Keen - I can't believe how incredibly harsh your family is being. I'm also surprised at your boyfriends reaction. I thought he wanted to have this baby too.

Remember that no one can MAKE you have an abortion. It truly sounds like that's not what you want. If you are still thinking about adoption, contact a local agency soon. They can help you with SO much. They can help you get a place to live, they can give you food vouchers, they can help with transportation to doctor visits.... I know I sound like a broken record, but there truly are great options out there. Remember that many adoptive families are willing to support you throughout and 6 weeks after your pregnancy. They'll even put you on their insurance so that the hospital bills are covered too. If the boyfriend is backing out on your, adoption may be the best idea.

If you find a safe place outside of your household, I wouldn't contact your family for awhile. They are OBVIOUSLY putting themselves and their opinions before you and the baby. That's not a healthy environment for you. If you can get out of there, do it soon.

There are LOTS of petite girls/women who carry perfectly healthy babies and have perfectly healthy pregnancies. You need to start getting prenatal care NOW! They need to check the baby out. They'll be able to tell you if there are any abnormalities at this point and time. They can continue to test throughout your pregnancy as well. The doctor will also be able to explain how your body will react to this pregnancy. A doctor is much more reliable and accurate than anyone here on Yahoo. Please, please, please start seeing a doctor soon.

I wish you nothing but the best. I hope to see more GOOD updates in the future.

Answer 2

I can't judge you, but I do think if you are going to have sex again, it would be safe sex. Practice safe sex, and use contraceptives.

If the baby is going to cause too much stress on you, your body, organs, etc, I'd go for the abortion. I know it is wrong, which it is, but if the baby is going to put you at risk to carry it full term (9 months) that is the best option. Also the baby may not develope correctly because you are still very young, thus many health problems can occur with the baby as well.

At 15 your body is still growing and developing, studies have proven that if you're under 20 and pregnant, you will be at risk for many serious health problems later on in life. You could also look into adoption, which I think is a better choice if you feel you can handle it. If you keep the baby you would have to put your career on hold for a bit, unless your mother would be willing to care for the baby during the day, or if you go to a school just for teen mothers.

Good luck, and I really hope you get help soon. Contact social services, maybe they can help you. For everyone that is judging this person, judge when you're perfect.

Answer 3

Not scolding you here but 15 is too young to be pregnant. It's like kids having kids but to answer your question, I think all the people telling you that you will die & your baby will be retarded, etc. are all a bunch of idiots and are just trying to scare the crap out of you. I do NOT believe in abortion whatsoever. I'm so happy you haven't had it done. Just have the baby and maybe give it up for adoption. That might just be the best thing to do since you're so young and so many family members are against it for some reason.

That way at least the baby can live vs. being killed in your womb with whatever tools they use. It's your body; you're right.

Try turning to a church for help. Talk to a priest or counselor and explain your whole situation. Maybe they can help you or know someone who can.

Answer 4

I am sorry that you are going through this. You are dealing with adult problems yet you are only a little girl. I guess this is the price you have to pay for doing things like an adult. I truly hope that you can get through this without the emotional scar that you can get. I am a single parent, I had my son when I was 20 years old and at that time, I had yet to finish high school and I had no real skills. Having my son was and continues to be my greatest joy, however, I can tell you that it has not been easy. It is one of the hardest things I have had to do. Raising a son is difficult and it only gets harder as they grow. The first couple of years after my son was born, I went from one house to another because everywhere I went (family or not) people would make faces or comments towards my son. For instance when he cried at night (babies do that alot) they would complain about the crying and ask me to keep it down and that would hurt my feelings. So I would move. After years of being unstable I decided to turn my life around and go back to school, obtain a better job and starting living on my own. Which is great however when having to face with supporting, raising and still dealing with other factors of my life can be very hard. I can also tell you that having a child means giving up alot in your life. No hanging out w/friends, no going shopping for yourself, and instead of staying out all night, you will stay up all night when your baby gets sick. Think twice about what you really want to do. There is other options besides abortion. I wish you the best.

Answer 5

Dang girl, I can't lie, that's tough... This may be one of the most trying times you'll remember of your life. I don't think I've ever been in a situation that's gotten that intense and I've been in some pretty dodgy situations myself. This is just one of those trials in your life that's really going to test your courage, your determination to keep doing what you believe... It seems like you could easily just go get the abortion and make everyone happy and put an end to all the drama of the situation... But it's going to matter a lot about whether you could deal with the repurcussions of that. You're going to have to live with the end results of your decision forever. I hope that your parents are just being irrational right now and that if you make that decision still to keep the baby that they will turn around later on. It's what I'd expect, for them to flip out with the news of everything, but I'd hope they'd turn around. On the boyfriend and his parents... that's tough. It's hard that your boyfriend isn't supportive of you (and his parents as well). It's not the first time, but you are young and I don't know how old your boyfriend is, but that's something that's hard to deal with at all ages...

Just think about the decision and how it's going to affect you and what you are going to be able to wake up feeling ok about later on in life. Don't feel pressured into making the decision by others...

Answer 6

I am so appalled by so many unthoughtful answers you've received. NOT all pregnancies are planned and yes you have to deal with the problem. If you don't want to end the pregnancy, don't. NO ONE can force you to do this. I agree that you need to find some help with getting a new place to live, food, etc. If you believe that you are to young to raise this child, you can always have the baby adopted. I far as I can tell from your question, you don't have much family support. Raising children is hard. I have two and I am still with the father, however it's still hard. I would definitely take some time and talk to some professional who can point you in the right direction.
If you feel the need to vent, talk more, feel free to e-mail me.

Answer 7

Thats such a real life story that happens to much teens. Well you do what you want with your baby and if you want to keep the baby, then you definelty should!! Most women who get abortions are decided from the start that they dont want the baby and the ones that do but did it anyway, end up with emotional problems. Dont worry about your pregnancy and the babies health, just make sure to go to all your doctor's appointments and drink your prenatal vitamins. My sister got pregnant at 13 years old and had the baby at 14. She is only 5'2 and delivered the baby just fine (vaginally). He was perfectly healthy and so was she! At first of course, your parents wanna kill you and throw you out, but they will come around and see pass it and love that baby like if its there own! Dont worry, just let everyone get over the fact that YOUR KEEPING IT! Dont let NOONE tell you what to do, cuz they will get over it and be happy once the baby is here! Goodluck!

*19 years old and 37 weeks pregnant.

Answer 8

You would not die from having this baby! my sister was that size when she got pregnant and she is 20 years old. Her son is now 5 months old! I understand how you feel, this is your child growing in you and if your family isnt ok with you having it, then to hell with them! If you have gotten an ultrasound, it usually detects if anything is wrong with the baby, like retardation, deformity, and it is very unlikely that anything is. I'm sure that your baby will be born healthy and beautiful! Have this baby, it is your child and if you want it, you should have it. If you dont want it than you should give it up for adoption, dont get an abortion. That is a horrible hting to do, you should tell your mother that! By now your baby probally has a beating heart, which is life. I f your mother thinks it's ok to abort your child look up on the internet how an aborted baby looks at the earliest stage of abortion and print it out and give it to her, that will definantly make her think twice about it! ok hon well best of luck to you

Answer 9

Dear Keen,

This is definately not an ideal situation to be in. I have a feeling (and hope) that you have learned your lesson regarding premarital sex and the consequences that it can have for yourself and others.

As a reminder, you are not alone. Unplanned teenage pregnancys are something that happen everyday, in every state. There are places that you can go for assistance. Look in your local phonebook to see if there are shelter's for unwed pregnant girls. It may feel ackward to call around, but if your family is not going to be supportive, you need a place to live. If you are wanting to continue on with the pregnancy, make sure that you have a doctor to monitor you during the pregnancy. Even though your height and weight may be okay, your body is still young and not fully developed. There may be many complications along the way just as your family says.

During the next 8 months, you may also want to consider giving the baby up for adoption. It sounds like the father of the baby doesn't want to take responsibility for HIS actions and won't be able to help support you and an infant. There are many couples that are unable to have children and would love to support you in your decision to bring this little life into the world and take care of it in a way that you may not be able to. I have a young friend who went through this a few years ago. It was not easy, but she knows that it was the best decision for her daughter to be raised in a home that can provide for her.

I'm not sure what area you are in, but here is a link for people whom you can trust to help you get through this: http://www.providentliving.org/ses/emotionalhealth/contact/1,12169,2128-1,00.html (it is not just for members of the lds faith)

Good luck, don't give up. It's your decision, it's your body. Don't stress yourself more than you need to, it can have an effect on the pregnancy. Finding a support group early on will help you to have a better chance on making it through the next 9 months. Your family may also come around.

Take care.

Answer 10

i know you are young but please do not let people force you to do something you dont want to do. Believe me, there are worst things in this world then having a baby at 15. I don't know who stuck it in your head that you could die if you continue with the pregnancy because of your size. Size has nothing to do with it, my friend is 4"9 and weights about 95 pounds and she gave birth with no problems. I don't know why they are telling you that you are being selfish. Being selfish would be killing your baby. You are actually acting the complete opposite. Instead of being selfish you are willing to give your child an opportunity at life. Abortion is not the only option, what about adoption. There are a lot of couples out there who would give their right arm for a baby. You can make one of those couple very happy and give your child a chance. Good Luck and I am sorry you have to deal with all that negativity.