i just found out my stepdaughter's husband cheated on her and
the person who saw him made me promise not to tell what should i do?
2007-07-26 22:43:07 · 26 answers · asked by mary b 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
YES...that's your daughter... Who cares who you made a promise to!!! What's RIGHT is RIGHT.
End of Story.
2007-07-26 22:45:36 · answer #1 · answered by Amber 2 · 1⤊ 2⤋
Why hurt your daughter if it is not what you have seen with your own eyes? If it is his mistake, then sometimes somethings should left unsaid. Try to forget about it for a while, but as soon as you find out that he cheated again or he has a lover, then you can tell her to save her from finding out herself and getting hurt. And after all keeping a secret is not a lie. We are all human beings, try to look on brighter side, and believe that it just happened once. Even if you said it to her, would she believe? Wouldn't she accept it as some kind of a manipulation?
The best way to decide is to make a list of two columns: advantages and disadvantages. Calculate the total number of items in each column and decide!
2007-07-26 23:00:39 · answer #2 · answered by Life is beautiful! 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes.
Sit her down and discuss the situation, telling her that so and so told you this, (you don't have to reveal who so and so is) and that you don't know if this person's information is correct or not. Tell her in a calm manner, warmly, and that you wanted her to know what you heard, but that you are not sure it is the truth. Tell her that she should find out if it is the truth before she gets upset. It's just gossip at this point, but it's serious gossip, and you just thought that she should know what you heard.
Tell her that you are sorry to be the bearer of ill news, but that you felt that she wouldn't want you to keep this to yourself and not tell her. Tell her also that if there is anything you can do to help, for her not to hesitate to ask.
2007-07-26 22:58:43 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You should keep out of it. You just found out that someone SAID he cheated. Unless you were in the bedroom, too, you don't know anything. And why would you be so quick to tell your stepdaughter something so hurtful and devastating? You sound a little spiteful to me.
2007-07-26 22:48:10 · answer #4 · answered by claudiacake 7 · 2⤊ 1⤋
Only if you want to be accused of being the person who caused problems in their relationship. Probably the best way is to drop the name once in awhile and not purse it beyond a name. It will come out in the wash without you getting blamed or accused.
2007-07-28 16:48:31 · answer #5 · answered by PCSTech 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You should tell the person who saw him to mind his own damn business and you keep your mouth shut too.
For all you know, you stepdaughter and her husband might have an open marriage or maybe he was at a business lunch.
The only thing telling her will accomplish is you will make yourself look like a troublemaking gossip.
You and your informant friend need to keep out of their business.
2007-07-26 22:48:28 · answer #6 · answered by Chris C 4 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Sounds like hearsay. You'd better catch him in the act or come up with some proof because if somebody screwed up and told a lie on me of that nature to my wife I can't say on here what I would do to them but I guarantee it wouldn't be pretty.
2007-07-26 22:48:39 · answer #7 · answered by Sloan R 5 · 3⤊ 0⤋
I think you should tell her.Does this marriage involve children, it would be bad if she thought she was in a committed marriage and some time too late found out he is a cheater and their lives will be ruined.She needs to know before they make children so she can get out of this unstable marriage.this kind of marriage will go no where good.If there is children and they already made a life together they might need counceling.But she has got to know if it is true so some real eveidence is needed.
2007-07-26 22:52:41 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 2⤋
She's your stepdaughter. Tell her dad, your husband & see what he thinks. I mean, that's not something you can just hold on to & digest.
2007-07-26 22:57:16 · answer #9 · answered by Unique Soul 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
yes i think you should as then she can deal with it as ond how she wants my reason is i know this couple were the wife cheated on the husband and his friend saw her and told him then he delt with it they worked through it and now they're fine so thats what i think and otherwise is she finds out that you knew and didn't tell her then she might get angry i hope i was of some help to you =P
2007-07-26 22:48:25 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 2⤋
I think you should first get some sort of proof cause she might not believe you especially since you cant tell her who told you.
2007-07-26 23:27:19 · answer #11 · answered by MZ. Latina 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋