I was with my best friend yesterday when she took a pregnancy test. She's thought she was pregnant several times before so I didn't think much of it, until she ran out of the bathroom with the test, hysterical. The test was positive and she was pregnant. Dont get me wrong. I was super excited for her and I'm thrilled she's having a baby because Im going to be seeing it alot anyway..but then later that night I started feeling a little jealous. I was diagnosed with PCOS a few years ago and was told I'll probably never be able to have kids. like I said, I'm very happy for her, and excited that she's going to be a mom..but how can I get over feeling jealous..and then feeling guilty about being jealous?
2007-07-26 16:29:55 · 9 answers · asked by Anonymous in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Trying to Conceive
tell her congrats for me! do you want a child? there is always adoption and even though its not the same feeling as the miracle of birth its still miracle. i was adopted when i was 12 days old and i love every minute of it. i would consider adoption. it helps children who need parents and gives people like you the chance to love a little bundle of joy.
2007-07-26 16:35:34 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 5⤊ 0⤋
well, it is soething you'll have to work through. it is natural to feel "jealous" or really more disappointed with your situation. even feeling happy for her doesn't get rid of your pain.
as far as pcos is concerned, there are so many good options for women suffering from pcos that are actually affordable.
you should see a reproductive endocrinologist. i have pcos and my doctor feels very confident that i will get pregnant. what helps me to feel better is taking control of my own situation by learning all that i can about pcos and my options, including things that i can do to improve my condition.
if you don't have access to a doc then i recommend this:
1) exercise for 30 minutes a day 5x a week regardless of weight. exercise improves hormonal balance.
2) take a good multivitamin
3) take omega fish oil
4) include cinnamin or organic apple cider vinegar into your diet. this is a natural way to treat insulin resistance which is one root cause of pcos
5) licorice root to decrease testosterone level
don't give up and get a new doctor. as long as you have ovaries and a uterus i think pregnancy is possible. it may not be easy to get pregnant but it is possible.
i'm pretty certain my grandma had pcos and she had two children without any fertility treatment.
2007-07-26 23:58:07 · answer #2 · answered by Roc 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I was in the same position with many of my friends in the 8 years that it took to conceive number one. Truthfully, there is no way to get over it. Once the baby is born and you get to know him/her as a person, the jealousy will go away, but for some reason, it is hardest to watch those closest to us going through a pregnancy, even though we are happy for them. I have no idea why, but it was definitely that way for me.
But don't bother feeling guilty about being jealous. It is human nature and to try to deny those feelings means you won't be true to yourself. Accept that it sucks, that it hurts, and that you wish things could be different. Then vow to be a good friend despite your pain (but don't be a martyr and put yourself in situations that hurt you).
I hope you find a way around your PCOS (I have seen many women with it get PG so it can happen) and that you will have your own baby soon to make it better.
2007-07-27 00:04:03 · answer #3 · answered by MissM 6 · 3⤊ 0⤋
First, I was diagnosed with PCOS and I am pregnant. Never give up hope or your fight to conceive.
It is totally normal what you are feeling. I was trying for 3yrs and I felt like everyone was pregnant but me and I didn't know how to be happy for friends in family because my emotions were all over the place.
What got me through it was the fact that I never gave up trying and I shared my feelings with my friends and told them how happy I was and asked them to pray for me and help me read up on my condition and shared my experience with them every step of the way.
Have you seen a fertility specialist? With their help I firmly believe conceiving will be possible.. I was told I beat the odds and all I did was take Clomid and have an IUI after 3 yrs of trying. I also asked my friends and family fr their prayers and support and the fertility specialist had me pregnant within 3 months..
hang in there... never give up.. and I'm sending lots of baby dust your way.
2007-07-27 00:40:46 · answer #4 · answered by snoopychick78 5 · 3⤊ 0⤋
I know where you are coming from. all of my friends are having kids and my husband and i have been trying for some time. brother-in-law got his girl friend pregnant and at first i wa was ok with it. till the baby got here i got the same feeling i want one so bad it makes me cry every time i get my period. and hers was it just happened they werent even trying and that makes it even harder on me. but i love my neice to death and wouldnt change it for the world. even though her mother is a peice of work and i hate that woman like her have kids and theres woman like us who want them more then anything in the wold.
Just let your friend know you care and you are behind her all the way. dont let it show but if shes a good friend maybe you can talk to her about it. im sure she will understand being a woman and if she knows how hard you have been trying. i would say try that if not then i would say dont give up. my mom had what you have and she has 2 kids and they told her she would never have kids .. i wish you the best of luck sweetie and i hope you do get your wish
2007-07-27 00:15:38 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 0⤋
I can understand how you feel. Same thing happened with my neighbor.... I also have PCOS, but my dr. has put me on some meds to help me ovulate(for 2nd child). Hope it works. I was also told i would have to try invitro fert. for a child, but 6 months later I became pregnant(he is now 3). hang in there....It is getting a little easier for me as time goes by.
2007-07-27 00:09:48 · answer #6 · answered by Prisillla68 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I don't think that you can just "get over" feeling jealous...but you should also not give up in your own battle to have kids...lots of women with pcos go on to have children, and you can also become the best adoptive mother out there...many things are there for you to make your life something that you can feel good and proud about...so don't just look to others and feel bad that you don't have what they have, just be happy for them and create your own happiness for yourself.
2007-07-26 23:55:17 · answer #7 · answered by Andrea 5 · 1⤊ 1⤋
I also was told the same thing and I have PCOS and I also have 3 kids also.....
There are good fertility drugs out there... Clomid being the most popular... also being what gave me 3 beautiful babies. When you are seriously ready and stable.... talk to your doctor about this.
As far as your friend... enjoy this with her and tell her just how happy for her you are and someday she can be there for you.
2007-07-26 23:35:46 · answer #8 · answered by Kishauna_P 3 · 4⤊ 0⤋
Two words: Grow up.
Or ...
Three words: Let it go.
Or ...
Four words: It's not about you.
2007-07-26 23:33:49 · answer #9 · answered by Just_One_Man's_Opinion 5 · 0⤊ 18⤋