he asked me to move out of state with him and bring my six month old son along with me. he wants to move closer to his family. what little he has left. which is great. we have been friends for many years and just recently started dating. i live with my mom and dad right now and it really sucks ya know how it is. i trust him and i know he loves me because my son isnt his son and he took him in as his own. i love him very much but i am scared what is your opinion on this?
2007-07-26 08:49:30 · 6 answers · asked by Tara 9600 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
well the dad doesnt really care either way it goes as long as he doesnt have to send me money which is whatever cuz i have a good job ( real estate) and there are even better jobs within that waiting for me out of state
2007-07-26 09:00:15 · update #1
well we live about 40 mins apart right now we are both wanting to move out together. find a place. get our financals in order and then move. i have known him for years now
2007-07-26 09:08:25 · update #2
I can relate to your being apprehensive about relocating.....since the two of you already know a substantial amount about each over the years as friends, the transtion from friends to best friends should be easier, and you will be greatly blessed even more if you get married and not just shack up with each other as such.....this is where communication is vital to any relationship.....first of all, concerning your son, are you under any type of decree that prohibits you from relocating outta your county with him, such as a divorce or legal separation document? Is his father even still around? Secondly, depending on how far your new home is gonna be, you both need to agree on when visits with your own family (and the boy's father, if need be) can be arranged so that your parents can see their grandson from time to time.....and keep in mind also that depending on how financially stabilized you two are, who will watch your son if you need to work.....the fact that he accepts your son as his own seed while still an infant makes everything that much easier, 'cause older boys tend to be rebellious and resentful to the new father.....that "he's not my father!" attitude.....the impression left on me is that your novio is pretty much gonna be the only father that your hijo is gonna have around, so junior will be able to grow up with a "one face father".....personally, I think you have found your best friend and since this opportunity has presented itself, I believe you should grab it and run with it.....the road of life is one long journey full of adventures, and it's better to embark on big ones like this than miserably go for a long period of time wondering "what if".....even if it hypothetically goes down in flames, you can always rise up from the ashes, but from what I've read, I believe the odds are highly in your favor.....put aside the fear, and act in faith and wisdom.....straight up sentiments, and His best blessings to the three of you.....
2007-07-26 09:37:34 · answer #1 · answered by toocoolsnoopy 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't move out of state with him. First of all your not married to the guy!!! If you were married that would be a different story. I know that long distance relationships are tough. I had a friend who lived in another state. We almost hooked up. I think you should just continue to get to know the guy more. He should marry you before asking you to move out state to be closer to him. What if you move out state and are unhappy? What if you move to be closer to your boyfriend and things don't work out the way you planned them? So many things could go wrong. Why do you have to move out to be closer to your boyfriend? Why can't he move to be closer to you? Do you have a job where you can afford to live near him? You can't just move out and think everything will be perfect. You need a job & you have to find a place to live. Unless he wants you to move in with him. I'm the type of person who would just do something because some guy though it was best. That's not me at all. Your might be different on this subject. Fallow your heart & gut. Don't do something because you think you have too. Don't settle either!!! If you need to make the change in your life do it because you want too. Don't do it because your boyfriend thinks it's best!!!
2007-07-26 09:01:13 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need a commitment before you move. Ask him questions on the future if he is serious because I moved about 6 years ago with my bf and we are not together and we still see each other and things but he wont commit we have seen each other for over 10 years and I know how i feel about him I want to marry him but make sure he is sure before you jump with him, make sure he is wanting a future with him
2007-07-26 08:56:34 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Get permission from the baby's father first! It is unlawful to leave the state with a minor child without the other parent's permission.
Then, think about things and make your decision from an educated point of view, not an emotional one.
2007-07-26 08:53:47 · answer #4 · answered by Starla_C 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
We are all moving toward something or away from something. Which is it with you? Are you moving to be with him or to be away from mom, dad and the ex? You know if you love him. You also know if you're using him as a ticket out of town. Guys are naive. Be honest with yourself and spare both of you some pain down the road?
2007-07-26 09:12:51 · answer #5 · answered by noshaymatall 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your 'additional detail' information makes it sound like you really want us to approve a decision you've already made.
I personally would not recommend such a move unless you were married. But, if you love him, trust him, and want to, then do it... It's your life :-)
~Kyanna
2007-07-26 09:27:29 · answer #6 · answered by Kyanna S 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋