How to tell boyfriend I forgot to take my birth control and I am pregnant?

Question

My boyfriend always reminds me to take my birth control, but I forgot and now I am pregnant. How should I go about this? I know my boyfriend does NOT want a child right now, but I do not want to have an abortion. What's an easy way of going about this? As if there actually is. I am 19 and he is 21. We both have good jobs, but I always wanted to have chldren after I was married. Life doesn't always go according to plan obviously, and I know he is going to be stressed out. Help =(

we've been together a year

Answer 1

You just have to be honest with him. There isn't going to be an easy way to say it. He might be a little upset or worried in the beginning and that's completely understandable. You also have to be understanding that he might be upset and he has every reason to be. If he's a good guy eventually he'll get over it probably even the same day and be happy about becoming a dad.

Answer 2

I was in the exact same position as you girl.
I missed a couple pills though, I left them at home when I went away for a weekend but totally didn't even realize it till like a week later.

I'm only 16 though.

I first told the father that I missed a pill.
He still didn't catch on.
Then I said, Well.. I missed my period too..
And he STILL didn't catch on till about 40 seconds later, he said "oh sh*t, did we do anything this month!?" and I said Yes.
Ha.
Then I told him I already took a test, and it was positive.

That was my personal experience.
I'm sure your 21 year old hubby will be a little smarter than my 17 year old ex. Haha...

Try not to stress about it..
I know he will not take it well at first, but he will most likely come around..
Just make sure you tell him things to comfort him too, like, "I know this was unplanned, and you might not be too happy right now.. I'm just as shocked and nervous as you are. But abortion is just.. I can't get myself to do it."

You know, talk him through it rather than waiting to see what he has to say. (He might say something he will regret, or something that will end up pissing you off).

I did all of my discussion via Texting though, which is a little stupid, yea, but I couldn't bring myself to talking to him in person.

You're 19 though, and he's already 21.. You can handle it.
You guys will be fine.
Make sure he realizes though that there are worse things that could happen.. That or you could have been a lot younger, like in my situation.

I'm VERY happy to be pregnant now :)
I can't wait to see my beautiful baby girl...!
She's supposed to be here tomorrow!
Yea, right though.. Haha.
(Even though the father isn't around anymore. He's stupid though, psh. Hah. I'm sure your boy will stick around. He's much more mature.)

You'll be okay, no matter what happens.

Answer 3

I would approach the subject very carefully and calmly. He might think that you purposely "forgot" to take your pill. He has to realize too though that when you play there is always the chance that you will pay because the pill is not 100% effective. Two of my friends got pregnant while on birth control. Even if he gets mad and chooses to leave, you can be a strong enough person to keep your baby. If you have a good job like you say, that's one less issue to worry about. I would also hope you have family and friends that will help and support your decision. Good luck to you and your baby!

Answer 4

Admit your mistake. If he doesn't want a child, and you don't want to end the pregnancy, the best option is to give the child up for adoption. If you choose that, let him know that's what you are going to do.

Then find a method of birth control he doesn't have to remind you to take so this doesn't happen again. Tell your health care provider that you have trouble remembering to take your pill every day and what would be a good alternative.

Answer 5

it happens, birth control is not 100 percent effective alone anyway. If you had been taking the pill for a while, one missed day is not going to hurt you, and will not be the only reason for getting pregnant. My sister took the pill every day religously and still ended up pregnant. It happens. There is no easy way to tell him, but you have to tell him (he will start to notice in a few weeks) Marriage does not mean that you are ready for a child. Only you know if you are ready for this. I believe in a woman's right to choose so I cannot give you advice in what to do, but follow your heart.

Answer 6

You wanted to have a baby, because when it comes to things like this you remember to take the pills. Abortion is not an option so you knew if you missed your pill this could happen. I would tell him and be over with it the baby will be here sooner then you think. Maybe he wanted to wait because he new it was going to be hard. Just because you have a good job that does not mean things are going to be OK . BE STRONG.GOOD LUCK!

Answer 7

Just be honest with him and tell him your feelings about the baby. If he doesn't want to help you then that is his decision but you shouldn't feel like you are the one at fault because birth control is both of your responsibility. Even on the pill women can get pregnant and if he didn't want children then he should have used a condom.

Answer 8

Just straight up tell him.
honesty is the best policy in this case. Lying will backfire.
And Abortion is something you don't want to do, you won't be the same.
You can always put the shild up for adoption if you and him aren't willing to keep the baby. But having a child will bring you closer in many ways. Don't worry. Just sit him down and tell him, it was a simple mistake that he should, and will forgive you for.

Answer 9

Yout just gotta tell him :-s There is no easy way, sorry =[ My cousin is 25, and his girlfriend got pregnant at the age of 19. She just told him, and he got super excited! He DID NOT want a child either! But he was happy! Austin (the baby) is now 3 months old, and they are a happy family! It'll end up perfectly! Good Luck =]

Answer 10

Something similar happened to me, but I didn't forget to take my pill. My boyfriends first reaction was complete shock, and just saying "we can't do this", or "we can't afford this", but after the initial shock wore off, which took about 3 days...he got very excited, (after we visited the doctor to confirm pregnancy). You just have to tell him, and hope that he is a good man that wants to take care of his responsibilities. I never expected to have a baby before marriage, but like you said life doesn't always work out that way. Although he will be stressed out, he will soon get over it and be excited about the new life you two are bringing into the world. At least you two are at the point of being able to support yourselves.