About 8 Months ago I found out that one of my friends was my second cousin and ever since we have been inseperable. She means a lot to me and we always have so much fun together. Well there is a guy that puts in so much effort to be with me. Daily, he shows me how much he cares for me and it feels so good to have someone you care about be that way towards you, considering on how many people in their early 20's are not into relationships. Anyhow I found out that 3 years ago my cousin and him messed around, NEVER were they together nor did they ever have any feelings for each other. Well this is where the problem lays, my cousin wants to stop talking to me because I decided to stay with the guy. They both can't stand each other and my cousin is basically making me choose. I would of never considered talking to someone that my cousin either cared about or dated, but that's not the case. Shouldn't she just be happy for me or did I cross the line?
2007-07-26 07:21:07 · 9 answers · asked by Quality 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
Did you know this guy before you found out your friend was your cousin? What do you mean by "messed around"?
If this was someone you met before or around the time you found out your friend was your cousin, then you should not feel guilty about the relationship. If this is someone you met after you found out your friend was your cousin and the "messing around" was more than kissing, then you should back off. If the "messing around" was only kissing, talk to your cousin and explain to her that although you value your relationship with her, you have feelings for this guy and would like to explore them further. This could end up being the man you spend the rest of your life with.
2007-07-26 08:13:05 · answer #1 · answered by Lisanne 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your cuz should not make you choose.... she is being a selfish little twit. Why does she hate him? I say go with your heart girl. although he should not make you choose either. they hate each other, but ..... they both love you........or do they? what is his plan? Is he just playing around for now, or is this something he is serious about. Find out his intentions. If he cant decide then dump him. Blood is thicker than water. I dont think you crossed any line. It is a problem between yourcuz nd you boyfriend and they are putting you in the middle. WHY DO THEY HATE EACH OTHER? THAT IS THE QUESTION! then go from there. What really happened 3 years ago? they liked each other enough once to mess around as you call it. What does that mean? did they have sex. mess around to me means near sex exprience. Why do they hate each other. YOur cousin is trying to control u.YOU control yourself.
2007-07-26 14:50:09 · answer #2 · answered by teena662002 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It sounds like she is jealous that he is so good to you, and he never treated her that way 3 years ago. She should get over it and be happy for you, whether she likes him or not, because her main concern should be your happiness. Two things: First, your cousin should not make you choose between him and her. You need to stand up for yourself - YOU make the choice - don't let anyone tell you who you can and can't go out with. Second, if you stay with him and you remain inseparable with your cousin/friend, it will be sticky because they don't like each other. It may cause some tension between you and each of them, so you will have to stay strong and not let them put you in the middle. If you develop a strong relationship with this man, remember, your loyalty and allegience will be with him - not your cousin.
2007-07-26 14:55:35 · answer #3 · answered by Annie 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She should be happy for you but instead is trying to use you to get revenge against this guy.
Tell her the following: "I like both of you and wish to maintain my relationship with you and with Daily." "It's your choice if you can accept that or not." "Let me know what you decide."
Good luck. She is in the wrong.
2007-07-26 14:25:38 · answer #4 · answered by Stefka 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You cousin needs to get over herself. She is self centered and selfish in the extreme, and she is making an unreasonable demand of you. You haven't crossed any line. Tell your cousin to quit making an absurd spectacle of herself.
2007-07-26 14:31:59 · answer #5 · answered by John Timothy 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She should be happy for you. If she really cares about you she'll get over it. Just keep the two of them away from each other
2007-07-26 14:25:31 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
a real friend should be happy if you're happy, they wouldn't make you choose. the only reason i could see her being against this is if she knew you were going to get hurt by him, but that is no reason to stop talking to you. you have to go with your gut on this one.
2007-07-26 14:27:29 · answer #7 · answered by DJ 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yea, she should be happy for you. Just because she hates the guy doesnt mean that its bad for you to date him. I mean seriously, why the heck is she throwing her tantrums at you, what the heck is her damage?!?!
2007-07-26 14:25:33 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like there is more there going on than meets the eye.
2007-07-26 14:34:44 · answer #9 · answered by Greg 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋