is it wrong that my wife is always telling me she is miserable because of me?

Question

she always nags me about how bored she is and that i never pay attention to her.. she is a stay at home mom of our two year old daughter, and we only have one car. i take it to work and she ends up stuck in the house all week. she usually only gets out once or twice a week, and its usually to run errands, like grocery shopping and stuff.. she also says that i put the x box, tv, and computer before her.. is she just saying all this to manipulate me to do what she wants me to? (and what that is, i have no clue at all!!) who is right and who is wrong here?

and ladies, what can i do to make things a little better for my wife? and also the relationship?

thanks in advance!!

Answer 1

find a babysitter for the two of you!! go out on the town, take her out to have some 'grown up' time with her man, maybe find a back country road to 'stargaze' on..

most importantly, when she tells you whats going on with her (when she 'b*tches' at you) are only listening to her tone? or are you trying to get the message she is trying to send, despite how she is sending it? most women like to know that what they say is valued by thier husband. do you listen when she talks? or do you tone her out because of the way she is talking?

another very important part of a woman's life is her 'alone time' aka time to herself without anyone bugging her. no babies, no husbands, no phone calls.. just time to sit and take a relaxing bubble bath, or go do something she likes that she would rather do alone (without a baby to drag around).. does she have enough time to herself? do you ever just say "okay honey, im taking the baby and we will see you later!" if you do, how often? does she have a "day off" from her "job" as a stay at home mom? maybe she needs a break once or twice a week. and unless you have a babysitter, that responsibility falls on you!

there is no manipulation on her part (from what you have said in your question). it really sounds like she is trying to reach out to you and say "im drowning! help me!" do you ever "rescue" her from her daily stress? maybe thats all she needs (ya know, in a nutshell)

Answer 2

You can start by getting her a freaking car man...She is like a prisoner in her own home...The only time she gets out of the house is once or twice a week to run errands? Unbelievable...And you wonder why she is miserable! I would be too! No stay-at-home mom should be without a vehicle...At least she will be able to take the baby to the park where she will meet other mommies, go over to some friends, take up a mommy and me class with her and the baby...Something to get the hell out of the house and the community for a while. What if there was an emergency?

So, get her a car and then take some time out of your tv, xbox and computer schedule to fit your wife in there a few times out of the week...You guys have to do more than co-exist in your home dude...Or else you won't be together much longer and you don't want that...Make an effort to make her a priority...The tv, xbox and computer aren't going anywhere but if you keep it up, she might be!

While your wife is waiting for you to purchase her a car, you can ask her would it be better for her and the baby if she took you to work everyday (or at least a few times out of the week) so that she can have a vehicle to get around in?

Sit your wife down and ask her these questions:

1)What can I do to make things better for you?

2)What can I do to make our relationship better?

She's the one you need to be asking these questions to...She can answer them so much better than any woman on this board ever could!

Answer 3

She may be finding out that being a stay at home mom isn't alot of fun. If you can, get her a car so she can get out of the house once in a while. She will have to take the kids, but the 4 walls can close in on you after a while. When you come home spend some time with the family and for sure some with her. She needs to respect your interests in gaming...you should be able to play for a few hours a week at least, after all you work and pay the bills. At least you are not out at the club, titty bar or running in the streets.

Answer 4

This is a very common problem for people in your situation, and it's got to be dealt with.
I've faced it, (not all that well), most marrieds face it eventually.
No, it's not your job to make her happy, nor is it her job to do the same for you, but if you're going to live together, you'd better consider each-other.
You've got to understand that she's been stuck with a 2 Yr. old all day, (try it for an hour or two), and is starved for some adult conversation.
She's got to understand that you've worked all day, are stressed out, and want a quiet hour with the xbox.
Work on it, work it out.

Answer 5

What you both need is a night out. Take her out to dinner. Then save up money for another care. And next time you come home from work, errands or whatever, spend time with HER not the TV.

Answer 6

No she is not saying that to manipulate you she will leave you! Theres nothing worser then a man sitting and spend all the time on a xbox,tv,computer and she gets no time and she spending all her time with the kids and dont get out. She will find someone else who will do what you are not doing because theres nothing worse then ignoring your woman. Right now she already thinking about leaving are cheating on you because your not doing ****.

Answer 7

Honestly you need to get her a car. I am a stay at home dad and full time student right now and I would go crazy if I was stuck at home with the kids all day. At least with a car she could go to the park with the kids and mingle with other moms or something. I never understood how hard it is to stay at home until I actually tried it. I give women who do it big props.

Answer 8

Honestly, you need to sit down and think about what she says, and what you really do.

Have you ever been too busy playing XBox to do something for her?
Have you ever made her wait for something because your favorite TV show was on?
Have you ever been too busy on the computer to ever help her out?

Did you say YES to any of these? Have you done any of those OFTEN?
Then you need to do something.
I say, take a few days off of work, get a good sitter, like your parents, or her parents, and take her on a relaxing "vacation". Let her know you care!

And, you know what?
Use part of your paycheck to get her a car! Paid by you!
She deserves it!

Answer 9

you need to help her with the shopping, and at least once a week do something with her, even if you don't have money you can go to the park, go fishing, etc. get a baby sitter and spend some time alone with her, and for that night ignore the x-box, tv, and computer

Answer 10

try to be more considerate. after all, he is your wife not your househelp. so show her that you care for her by helping at home, cuddling, and also, take her out once a week - to dinner, not to a grocery buying stuff. let her rest also. and tell her you love her at least once a day. and tell her you're thankful that you have her in your life. be sincere, too.