I am so hurt and angry that I just want to pull his hair and slap him around... I know that he's impossible to live with as he has picked his family over me... I want to get over him but sometimes it hurts a lot more.... just venting I guess... aaggrrr...I know that I'll be ok
2007-07-24 15:41:08 · 23 answers · asked by Centered 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
You are right, you will be ok. It is ok to be angry, scream and shout if you need too. Time is a wonderful thing. It heals all wounds. I promise. Think of all the great experiences that are waiting for you.
2007-07-24 15:45:35 · answer #1 · answered by LISA M 1 · 3⤊ 0⤋
What hurts in a situation like that is that you can basically turn off the marriage by divorce, but you can't turn feelings off the same way. I watched someone very close to me get divorced and then get remarried. Then about 3 years later they got divorced again and had it stopped before it became final. They are not happy together but they don't think they can live without each other even though they would be better off apart. Time heals all wounds and with time you will see things differently. If it wasn't meant to be, maybe something better is waiting for you
2007-07-24 15:49:58 · answer #2 · answered by pchickie 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
It will ease up in time. Stay away from dating until you get a handle on your feelings and what happened in the relationship. In the meantime, get active in your community and join a church, some club, take a class, find out more about yourself. Meditate to help you relax and to get out of your anger. Also, go to a really good salon and get a complete make over. If it costs too much, save money and each time you put money in a jar or whatever picture yourself relaxing under the trained fingers of a massage therapist. Massages supposedly help you deal with all of life's rough bumps. Also, it will help relax you and keep you from trapping the anger in your body. Make sure you save enough to buy the make up and hair products you will need to keep up your new look. Then, start saving to buy an upgraded wardrobe. Keep setting new goals for yourself that are just for you doing things for you and your future. Then, if you can see a therpist in the meantime. Hang out with your girlfriends but don't go hunting for a new guy.
2007-07-24 15:50:16 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Your anger is understandable, and you probably want to hurt him as much as you're hurting right now but that's exactly what he wants. Everytime you show your anger and act out your emotions towards him, only gives him more power and control over you and your emotions. You just need to show strength, composure, and find something else to take your mind off of things. As soon as he were to realize that things are no longer bothering you, he would most likely become angered and agitated within due to his loss of control over you. They say it is time that heals but that's wrong, it's really what you do during that time that makes a difference. So, don't let him get the best of you. Take care, you'll be alright.
2007-07-24 16:05:57 · answer #4 · answered by D M 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
took me almost 3 years to realize that i made the right choice in getting a divorce. if a man puts u last he doesn't really love u, why cry over something u have no control over anyway? yes it will hurt for a time, but once u begin to see that theres a life out there for u u will feel better. when we loose someone we love we do hurt, that is normal, but we always seem to get better and we always move on no matter how badly u feel now, time and distance heals everything.
2007-07-24 15:48:04 · answer #5 · answered by jude 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I know how you feel. Even though I initiated my divorce from a very abusive alcoholic, I had a lot of anger and pain afterward. I was very worried that I would carry over baggage from my crazy marriage into new relationships. Thankfully, I found a great therapist who helped me tremendously. I got my feet back on the ground in no time and my life got 1000% better. I suggest you find a good therapist to help you through this. Most likely, your insurance will pay for it too.
2007-07-24 15:46:03 · answer #6 · answered by Emily Dew 7 · 3⤊ 0⤋
One of the most common questions spouses ask when confronting a marriage crisis is this: How can I save my marriage if my partner doesn't want to help find a solution? How do I succeed I am trying to save my marriage on my own? Learn here https://bitly.im/aMmiN It is a typical enough story: one partner leaves, the other stays. One remains 'in love', the other is uncertain. Whatever it is that has caused a couple to be apart, the one person who remains bears the prospect, fear, doubt, desire, hope of saving his or her marriage' alone.
2016-05-18 05:40:25 · answer #7 · answered by Marcia 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The hurt will be felt 100% in the beginning. Eventually the hurt will die down to 80%, 60%, etc. until 10% remains. That 10% is memories and experience.
2007-07-24 15:54:47 · answer #8 · answered by acedelux 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
No! NO! NO! NO! NO! NO!
No, I mean I KNOW what you are going thru!!!!
I do! I do! I do!
Sister, YOU are not alone!
Believe me!
Do NOT let his choices dictate how you feel about yourself, and do not let the anger take you over to where you want to make him Pay--it only hurts you.....read some books, vent with your gal-pals, but the best "revenge" is to move on and be happy in yourself and your own life.
"If he undervalues me, what care I , How grand he be?"
Got it?
Get it!
"Now, go have a great life and LIVE....be safe, be happy,
and don't let that TURKEY get you down!"
Mama said!
2007-07-24 15:53:20 · answer #9 · answered by susieque 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Make yourself busy. Find something to do with your time and aggression. Take an art class or martial arts, or anything, really. Eventually you'll find that you are just enjoying life again instead of trying to get over the divorce.
2007-07-24 15:46:50 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋