I have been married for about 3 and half years. I caught my husband posting pictures of me online to strangers and talking to other women on line sexually. This was going on all through our relationship until i caught him. We worked things out but i still get worried. This past year he started opening up to me and asked if we would try new things. He wanted me to sleep with someone else. I did not know he wanted me to because he cheated on me 4 months after we were married and he felt quilty. When i did find out he cheated on me. I cheated on him. We seperated for about 6 months and got back together. I am pregnant now with our second child but i fell i have not recovered from all the fromhurt last year. i have known him my whole life(he was the boy next door). Recently the man i had an affair with tried to contact me. I told my husband about it and now he is accusing me of cheating. What i went through destroyed my life. i would not go through it again. Do i stay or go?
2007-07-24 11:01:59 · 14 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
If my husband was posting pictures of me online and also done the things your saying he did and does, Honey, I would and could make up mind quickly. He could have all the women he wanted. Your first mistake was cheating on him and the next was going back after being separated for 6 months. If there was any way to work this out then I would say don't leave, but what does this marriage have left?
2007-07-24 11:09:32 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 5⤊ 0⤋
Wow I'm sorry. No one can really tell you to stay or go, you may still love him, and maybe you always will, but are you in love with him? Do you see yourself growing old with this person? Can you ever truly forgive him, trust him again, ever? And what about your children? Do you want to raise them in a "unsteady" home? Some times having 2 parents is not always the best or right answer, you both can be good / better parents, apart. His accusing you of cheating sounds like his own guilt, if he can shine the light on you, then it's off him right? And he wanted you to sleep with someone else? Hey sounds like he wanted that so he could hold it over you! You may be able to forgive one "slip" but when it's cronic cheating, it will most likely never change, don't you deserve better? The timing stinks for you, you must be scared, one child and another on the way, but you can do it! Lean on family and friends for a while, you can build a great life for yourself and stand tall. Gee, sounds like I'm leaning to you leaving huh? Sorry, your guy sounds like my ex, makes me mad ; ) No excuse for abuse of any kind.
2007-07-24 18:16:19 · answer #2 · answered by JazzyLynn 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Nobody can tell you what to do. There are no easy answers, but nevertheless, it's an answer that you are going to have to figure out yourself.
If there is no trust in your marriage, then you have nothing. Every relationship is built on trust, but marriage especially.
Listen to your gut and your head. Take a step back and look at the whole picture. Is this really the man you want to spend the rest of your life with?? Can you regain your trust in him and he regain his trust in you?? Do you love him or are you "in love" with him??
I know it's not easy, but figuring this out on your own, will only make you a better person and feel more in control of the outcome.
Best of luck to you!
2007-07-24 18:07:31 · answer #3 · answered by endo_chic 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
That's tought to say. People do make mistakes, but if you can't forgive him and/or yourself and you don't feel that trust can ever exist between you two, then it's probably not going to work. As far as for sleeping with somebody else, there are plenty of couples out there that are swingers, but it has to be a mutual thing. Don't do it just because he wants you to, do it because you want to try something different WITH your husband.
2007-07-24 18:07:40 · answer #4 · answered by JC 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Stay or go - do you mean go to this other guy - or just go? Don't go to this other guy. Leave your husband? Only you know what to do there. Sounds like you two have created a trail of deceit and your relationship is no longer built on trust. Why don't you two go to counseling. You now have 2 kids, its definitely worth a shot to try to save your marriage.
2007-07-24 18:18:19 · answer #5 · answered by Carey L 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
What a lot of drama. Why did you allow yourself to get pregnant? If you're asking the question indicates to me you're ready for a new relationship. Additionally I don't think this is a healthy relationship and I don't think you want your children to model this behavior. Do you? Good luck!
2007-07-24 18:19:21 · answer #6 · answered by broncoFan 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You should definitely go...your husband has proven over and over again that the is a cheater and that he can't be trusted. Your answer to his cheating was to cheat on him? Bad idea! If you stay with him...all I can say is you both deserve one another.
2007-07-24 18:06:52 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
You guys are totally screwed up! Just chuck the whole thing and start over with someone else.
2007-07-24 18:06:34 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Does not sound like much of a marriage, with everyone cheating on everyone else, sounds more like a soap. This is strictly your decision, no one else can make it for you
2007-07-24 18:07:07 · answer #9 · answered by Pengy 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Get counselling. from a Priest, Minister, Rabbi, or marriage councillor. go to your Dr. Ask them if they can help or if they know some one who can. Tell them if money is a problem. Good luck.
2007-07-24 18:09:13 · answer #10 · answered by pigwell 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋