How can I convince my husband not to circumcise our next child?

Question

....If the baby is a boy....and What if we can't agree?

BTW, our 2 sons *are* circumcised, but I've since changed my mind and reget doing it to them. My younger son, 3 years old, actually has stenosis and needs that and some adhesions on his penis repaired after having been circumcised.

Answer 1

One way may be to talk to him in terms most men would understand. For instance, there are indications that circumcised males' penises are more desensitized because their penis tip is constantly rubbing against clothing and thus un-circumcised males get more enjoyment out of sex.

This is certainly a contentious subject and people seem to be very adamant about their position (mine is better than yours) especially since this involves the apex of male virility, so tread lightly. A good background on most the issues involved can be found in the wikipedia link below. Be advised, the pictures in the link may not be safe for work.

Answer 2

Why did God put it there if he meant for it to be cut off? Silly thing for someone to say. I want it to be my son's decision when he is older, I mean it is his body. I won't get my daughter body piercing until she is old enough to decide even though I think little earrings are adorable. I read that sex between husband and wife is much more comfy with an intact husband. My husband is debating but I hope to win him over to my way of thinking.

Answer 3

ask your husband to do some research on the pro nd cons of circumcision. you do the same. come together at a set date/time and lay it all out for each other. both of you need to try to be open minded. as part of your argument, have your husband check this link out. WARNING: it can get graphic. i cried. ='(
http://oknocirc.blogspot.com/

for your worries on your newest baby being "different" here is an excerpt of how you might deal with it....

"Yeah, what about when the father or older brother is circumcised? Shouldn't they look the same?

There are so many inborn differences between fathers and sons and between brothers. Some will have brown eyes, some will have blue, some will have their mother's nose and their grandfather's hands. A child will never be a carbon copy that looks just like his father and it is silly to insist that the son have cosmetic surgery on his normal penis so it will look like Dad or big bro. What if the father is missing a finger or has scars from an accident or any other surgery? We don't mark the son similarly then! If older brothers are circumcised it's easy to tell the boys that when the older brother was born his penis looked like the younger boy's penis but back then the parents thought it was a good idea to cut off his foreskin (and that they thought that was a good idea when Daddy was born, too, if that's relevant) but now we don't do that anymore. It really is that simple!"

Answer 4

"My younger son, 3 years old, actually has stenosis and needs that and some adhesions on his penis repaired after having been circumcised."

Isn't that reason enough?! Estimates are only 20 - 50% of boys are circumcised now. So the "locker room factor" is no longer important.

Answer 5

Well they ask the mom not the dad. Just tell them no when they ask you if he will be circumcised. Explain to your husband that you don't want to cause pain to your child and that circumcision is really just a cosmetic procedure. Remind him of what you had to go through with your 3 year old because of the circumcision.

Answer 6

I understand all your reasons for NOT wanting to circumcise your next child, and they are valid. But consider that your boys WILL see each other naked (I've never encountered any home where the kids didn't), and they will wonder why they're different. That might bring up more problems in terms of self image than the circumcision. Being "different", even for good and valid reasons, can be a very hard thing for a child to deal with.

Answer 7

Does he really want to put another baby through that? Come on, we live in the 21st century. With hygeine being what it is today, there's hardly a reason to do it. Maybe your son would like to have a choice in the matter when he gets older. I don't know my husband and I argue about this all the time. Ask him if he would want you to circumsize a baby girl, they do that in Africa, does that make it right?

Answer 8

I hate to say it but most medical forms only require the MOTHER'S consent. But I don't think you should go that route because it can put your relationship in some hot water. It makes sense that because of your older son you don't want it done again, but as I've said before in previous circumcision questions; I've never heard of a man who wished he was never circumcised versus a man who wished he was. It's your decision but think- How different this boy will feel next to his brothers and his father?

Answer 9

Don't you think that your husband has a better grasp on the male body than you? maybe you should listen up a little more when he is talking about penis'. And as for the circ. you can request that a surgeon do it or someone really good at it.

Answer 10

i agree with your husband, men are supposed to be circumcised,its just a natural thing and thats the way god wanted to be.Don't be afraid of stenosis again, god will deliever if you choose to have him circumcised.