i was once abused physically, emotionally and sexually at the age of 21. i dated a 30year old then. one day he forced me to watch him and his ex ******* and ever since then i dont enjoy watching people do it but i have atleast learned to enjoy sex. how do i deal with the thought that brings back my nightmares..?
2007-07-24 10:23:38 · 9 answers · asked by blackbooty 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
i wonder how being tyred to a chair, with someone forcing my head to face the direction and forcing me to open my eyes open can be my fault. we ask for help because we need it not because we want anyone to judge me or to do the blame thing or assume to feel your pain. i would like to be normal too, is that so much to ask.
2007-07-27 13:18:26 · update #1
I was sexually abused too. It isn't your fault, no matter what anyone says to you. It is like being raped, you lose all control over your body and mind. I did the counseling thing but didn't find it really helpful. I looked to God and found the answers I needed. God allowed a wonderful patient man into my life and I have never been happier. I am healed by love and you will be too if you allow it. Do not get hooked on porn that is nothing but two dogs going at it. There is no emotions behind it. What you need is true love and it makes all the difference in the world, if you will open up and trust. Good luck, sweetie.
2007-07-30 14:41:44 · answer #1 · answered by sewcrafty 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
What would make someone do something like that to someone else? and what kind of a person would go along with this torture of another human being its really sick and I am sure it must hurt so much I am really sorry you had to go through this I am glad you've learned to find joy in sex but you dont need to befriend porn its not necessary and unless you like the kinky stuff you dont need to be watching other people have sex either its not a requirement to enjoy sex if you have a partner who you love and loves you explain your situation to him or her and they will understand why you feel how you feel
dont let yourself become a victim again by allowing someone else in your life to make you do something you dont want to do. if however you do like to watch people have sex and enjoy porno why dont you check out an escort service and have them play out the situation with love and tenderness to see if that replaces the bad experience in your brain you know replace a bad memory with a good one you call the shots when your paying for it so maybe its an idea but I would have my partner or friend watch with me in case I freaked out he could get me out of there.
2007-07-31 09:57:04 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
For one not liking to watch porn is NOT A BAD THING!!!!!!! Your reasons for it might be I don't know you really going to need consouling because your dealing with more then just the abuse hunnie. Besides that you were 21 years old and you aloud this to happen to you, you did, sorry, it was your choice to endour this, which is why you need the consoler because your not going to believe me. Also sex isn't exactly what we think it is... how do I put it.... Kids have sex, Adults make love, so if you getting use to just making sex again and thinking you need to watch porn your actually regression, again go to consouling because there isn't enough room on this webpage for me to say all the things you need to hear. Just realize that it was an unhealthy view of intimate relationships that got you in this mess and if you don't learn how to have a healthy view well then your bond to repeat the past. Also with these things we need to learn what is our fault and what isn't, good luck and whatever god you pray to bless!
2007-07-26 10:53:02 · answer #3 · answered by Brutal Honesty 7 · 0⤊ 2⤋
Dont listen to what the @$$hole said about it being your fault, sounds like something someone like your ex would have said, and its completely wrong.
There is nothing wrong with not liking porn. Not everyone does. You should seek some counseling though because it sounds like you still have a lot of issues to work through.
2007-07-31 09:40:01 · answer #4 · answered by Lena 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Take time to get over the incident, having someone to talk to may help you, and start slowly by watching porn eventually.
2007-08-01 08:07:05 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
i say if you enjoy having sex then have sex and don't worry about watching people have sex or porn
2007-08-01 04:36:03 · answer #6 · answered by netra 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you dont have to befriend porn dont watch it not everybody does...good luck in your healing
2007-07-31 13:24:14 · answer #7 · answered by gypsyirel 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
no that is not to much to ask,i hope someday you heal completely from all this pain
2007-07-31 00:07:51 · answer #8 · answered by tnsupermomwhit 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
honey get some counseling fast
2007-07-30 06:28:52 · answer #9 · answered by cheri h 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋