My hubby works where he goes into other peoples homes and repairs things, more ....?

Question

Well, I called him to check on him and see that he is ok. I worry because he is always crawling under the house or in the attic or on the roof. He has come home many times with cuts on his body, that he got from work, I guess at least I did not put them there.
Well, I just tried to talk to him and he acted all pissed off because I was calling to see if he was ok. I mean, he fell off of a ladder not too long ago, not a short ladder, one that reaches a three story house!
So, anyways...he was acting all guilty, and saying. "What do you want? I am trying to finish up here. Trying to show this lady how to use." And then his phone shut off and I can't reach him.
I Talked to his friend Barry the other day, and he said that his wife was divorcing him because he was screwing around on her with his customers. He goes to a ladies house and smooth talks her into sex and repair service. Should I be worried?
Thanks in advance. We have been married 10 + years, & are having our 2nd child.

We still have sex, though not as often as before.
It used to be 4- 5 times a week, now I am lucky to get 2.
Please can you advise?

The customers do not pay him, nor the other guys.
The company pays them, I know I do his books. These are repair services that are covered by his company in service agreements of some sort.
Which means, that the customer originally paid 50.00 for him to come out repeatedly and the cost of the service call is 15.00 . So he gets paid 15.00 by his company and could be at one house ALL flipping day for 15.00.
Now, stick that in there and swirl it around a bit...thanks!
How is that a nice day at work?

Answer 1

Maybe he is just under alot of strain at work and then the fall and the new baby coming. I wouldnt asume he is cheating just because you couldnt reach him again. Maybe his battery is dead. As far as the sex part you are having another baby and maybe he doesnt want to do it as much because of that now. Talk to him and dont listen to Barry.

Answer 2

Doesn't sound good, but there is no "proof" that he's cheating. Right off the first thing I thought was that your constant calling to ask if he was "ok" was seen as nagging or checking up on him by you. Men don't really like that and while we do it out of concern, they are thinking they are fine and are not babies, etc. Either way, he has no business disrespecting you in that manner. His turning off the phone was extreme I will admit. But obviously he knew you'd call again, hence turning off the phone. Why did you call back? I think that your having this converstion with "Barry" has got you upset and suspecting your husband. I don't know why your husband's friend would tell you this story knowing you'd probably question if your husband did this also. He's either intentionally planting doubt in your head - maybe he likes you or maybe misery loves company, his wife is leaving him and he wants you to leave your husband or he's trying to warn you without coming straight out. The thing is, you will only really know until you have proof. I know what it feels like to constantly doubt...wondering when the other shoe will drop. That is no way to live. Talk to your husband, tell him you don't like him disrespecting you in that manner. Then what you do is STOP calling him. Trust me this works. I too used to call my husband at work all the time - well we called each other - we both have jobs where we are basically in an office for most of the day so calling and texting is easy. But when my husband starting having some strange behavior - phone is busy or rings and rings more often than he would pick up and then when I did get through he was very distracted. Once I called him to ask him a question and he HUNG UP ON ME! That was the last straw. I didn't call him back and didn't utter one word to him for three days. Now, I hardly ever call him. What has happened? He's gotten curious...so he calls me all the time and sometimes I don't pick up the phone (I have caller id) or he'll text me "how's your day going" and I will either ignore the text or answer like an hour later. It works, trust me. Turn the tables around, make your husband start wondering what YOU are doing. It takes some of the stress off you - you will still doubt and wonder - but you won't be sitting there going bonkers. Then truly find things to do to take your mind off it. Another thing I did was started going out with my gfriends again - I had almost completely stopped after I got married. We'd go to bingo, or out for a few drinks, I joined an exercise class with my one friend...even to church. Anything you can do that does't include him. At first he'll be relieved - especially if he's cheating - as he'll have more free time. But eventually he'll start to wonder what the hell is going on. My husband started telling me how he loved me, never wanted to lose me. He asked me "do you still love me" and then he finally asked me if I was having an internet affair! Though I'm not (have thought about it though) I love the fact that HE is now the one questioning. I know it's a game, but what the hell else are we to do? We can't divorce them without proof, so just have to lay low for now. Trust me, if he's cheating, it will come out sooner or later. Just start preparing yourself now, mentally, for what you'll do if he is. Good luck.

Answer 3

First, be honest with yourself, if not this forum. You aren't really concerned with his safety. You don't trust him, because you think that what Barry does, all men do. Once you get that stuff out of your head, and realize that your husband is not Barry, then think beyond why "he" isn't performing more in bed. Is it possible that it's YOU? Did you get an extra 50 pounds around the gut? Are you the one that doesn't trust him or does he not trust you? After all, if what you say is true, that these repairmen go to women's houses and have sex with them all day long, then your husband MUST be thinking that while he's out working and paying to put food in your mouth, your at home having sex with some other repairman. Doesn't sound so great when the shoe is on the other foot, does it? What you need to do, is put some of the interest back in your marriage. When he comes home from work, after climbing in attics all day long, getting complaints from dissatisfied customers, listening to their problems, do you ease him back into "your' life, or do you just continue to tell him all of your problems as well?

Answer 4

You must be married to the most goreous guy in the world if married houswives all over town are calling him for sex. Especially if he's hot, sticky, sweaty, and stinky from crawling around in atics and under hourses. Could there be one or two women that he enjoys seeing from time to time? Perhaps. But if you don't trust your husband then you need to get some professional help. Calling him up 2-3 times a day to "make sure he's okay" is going to get pretty irritating after a while. What are you expecting anyway? To hear him out of breath and a woman's voice in the background? C'mon. You should be thankful your husband has a job and comes home to you and his family every night. Many men don't.

Answer 5

You need to consider how stupid you make him look when he is working and his wife is calling him to make sure he hasn't fallen off a ladder. Your income depends on him being focused on his job. His safety also depends on it. He knows what his friend did. He likely fears that you will assume he is doing the same and force him to give up his job.

Also, you are pregnant and have all sorts of wild hormones going through you that can change your moods without logical reason.

I should also mention that I have worked at many customer sites. They will accept a certain amount of communication between a worker and his boss or other customers only because they expect to be able to make contact if they need to. They get pissed when they are paying an hourly rate for a worker to sit on the phone and baby sit his wife. My wife knows only to call me if it's an emergency. Otherwise, I will read my email when I have time or see her after work.

Answer 6

If I was at work and kept getting calls asking how I am, I would be annoyed at hell. If he gets in an accident, I'm sure you will be informed, there is NO reason to call and check on that. Are you sure you aren't checking on his fidelity?
I do not think that the frequency of sex is a clear indication of cheating .... is there any other reason that you are suspicious?
The fact that you heard that someone else cheated with customers is no reason at all to get worked up.
Unless there's a lot more to this story, you are being paranoid.

Answer 7

I think your being a little too paranoid. He probably just wants to get his job done without a whole lot of interuptions. It can be very distracting to be crawling around in an attic or working on the roof and you call just to know if he's ok. I realize you are concerned, but he is not a child. If he is in the middle of something rigorous or just wants to complete the job all of this can be irritating.

Answer 8

I've had a lot of repair men in my home, but I never solicit them for sex and they don't try anything on me either. Maybe they're scared! Anyway, I feel like this is something right out of Penthouse forum. Men are not the sex dogs they want you to think they are. Oh, they want you to believe that all the women want them, but most women have so many opportunities that they don't care about the dirty old repair man. He'd have to be a pretty hot stud muffin to get any action. I don't think he is. Stop calling him. It only makes him think he's a stud muffin.

Answer 9

A customers house is not the place where he wants to take a personal phone call. Dealing with some customers is bad enough. But, when the customer is paying by the hour, last thing he or she wants to do is see the repairman on a personal call.

Answer 10

First let me say this, try and talk with your husband explaining to him that you worry about his safety. Don't accuse him of any wrong-doing, that will only make matters worse. If he doesn't or will not talk, then leave it alone. Now you must ask yourself some questions. Has your husband ever "cheated" on you in the past? Why did you talk to his friend? Has your husband given you some reason to suspect him of "messing-around" on you? Now for the big question, "What would you do if you caught him cheating on you?"