Can a cheater change his ways?

Question

Do you think it's possible for a man to realize he was wrong to stray? And would that realization keep him from doing it again? Do you think having kids to lose factors in to his decision?

Answer 1

Depends on the man. If he is low-life scum he will not care whether he has kids or not. His little wee-wee is thinking for him and it's brain is not too big.

But if your man has higher intellectual faculty then yes he will realize that his kids are important to him and so is his family.
Marriage is a two way street, you need to show him that you care for him too.

Answer 2

It's possible for a man to realize he was wrong to stray. It's possible he may apologize. It's possible that he will never do it again. But is it possible that he won't ACTUALLY do it? Now that I find hard to believe. He might realize it, but he's probably not going to do anythin bout it. He might even do it again and again until it's him that finally gets hurt. What about having kids? I don't think that will help. He'll probably even cheat more. You even see it in movies, tv and reality. No, I don't think they will stop cheating even if they did it once and come to a realization.

Answer 3

I absolutely think it's possible. I've known just as many men who changed their ways, as I have known that haven't. I think it will take some time and counseling to see if this is true in your case. I don't think it's losing kids that factors into the decision maybe more losing the whole lifestyle he's grown accustomed to. Assuming that the marriage was decent and the person made a mistake due to lust or whatever they may truly love their wife and hate that they dissappointed her, they may want the family to stay together, etc. You have to decide if it's something you can ever move past because many people can't move past these things and keep punishing their spouse for past sins.

Answer 4

Yes I think a cheater can change, but I don't think that is the norm. People stop smoking, people stop drinking. It depends on the "want to" factor. Yes, they'll probably always be tempted just like I always want a chocolate donut. I tend to trust people to a fault and everyone deserves a second chance. Have a free heart and if he does it again, then you know to run away with no looking back.

Answer 5

The problem is a man/woman can love their kids and not love you.
They can spend time with their kids on a weekend or every other day, and still want to be with someone else.

It's a messed up world and some folks just stay together for the sake of their kids, but once the kids are in college or have their own life, it's splits ville again.

I agree with the first answers. ONCE A CHEATER, always a CHEATER. It happens to both men and women.

Just look at Prince Charles and Diana!

Answer 6

I think it's possible for a man to realized that he's wrong for doing what he's doing. But that doesn't mean that he's gonna change for anyone. I think a cheater is always and will be a cheater no matter what they say, or how much they've changed. I used to think it could happen, but once again, I was wrong. So, yes....man will always cheats, if they've cheated on you.

Answer 7

I think it depends on how long and how many times the guys cheated. I myself think that when they constantly cheat it becomes a sexual addiction then which is hard to cure.I think mistakes do happen and if it only happened one time it might have just been bad choices sometimes men are seduced and it isn't always their fault .Many factors include: drinking , drugs, etc. I think if he was really sorry and knew he would lose the person they loved and they realized how very much the man had hurt her that it might be a one time occurance. When kids are involved I think men are less apt to stray.

Answer 8

Anyone CAN change...the issue is do they choose to? There's a reason for the saying "Once a cheater, always a cheater". Although it's not true in general, it's true more often than not...

I knew one man years ago that cheated on his wife though, and afterward was plagued with guilt. He hadn't expected that to happen but he immediately broke off the situation with the one he cheated with and as far as I know didn't do it again with anyone.

My first husband says he cheated on his 1st wife because she accused him of it all the time, prior to him doing it. While we were married he cheated on my multiple times...he married a 3rd time and I don't know if he's been faithful to her or not.

No, I don't think kids are often a factor. Cheating may cause divorce, but rarely does the cheating parent lose all rights to their kids...their selfish desire to cheat typically overrides any thought of possible repercussion.

Answer 9

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Answer 10

I believe that only with mature can a man really realize and appreciate what he has in his lady. Kids are not really a factor because they may just slow him down but not stop the desire to be with someone else.

Answer 11

Yes, I do believe someone can change. Has he only cheated once? Then I'd give him another chance - assuming he is genuinely remorseful. If he's done it more than once, though, no way. He'll keep doing it over and over until he realizes you won't keep forgiving him.

And no, I believe true cheaters (the kind that don't stop) don't even think about their children when they're considering cheating. They only think of themselves.