I have been getting a ton of attention from different men. I am married but my husband just doesn't pay me too much attention himself. I am eating the extra attention up with a spoon. I don't feel bad either. Should I?
Oh and before you say it. I have talked to my husband but it doesn't change. It's just how he is, i guess.
2007-07-24 08:15:02 · 15 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
it's just attention people, not sex. calm down!
2007-07-24 08:26:44 · update #1
I understand how you feel! For me it started out as eating up the attention, but soon it grew to resentment and pain that my husband, the man that I loved wasn't paying me any attention. Then I started thinking, all these other men think so much of me, why doesn't he, and all these other thoughts. Next I was wanting to leave him.
If you can keep it to harmless flirting and not let it get out of hand, then enjoy it. If you start resenting your husband for it, then it's time to figure out what you want out of life instead.
2007-07-24 08:21:34 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
No, its fine if its just attention. Once you step across the line into infidelity, then it is WRONG and you should feel quilty.
Welcome to the world of many men. Their wives start to treat them like a piece of furniture with a paycheck, the guy gets attention from outside the marriage, he acts on it, the the wife gets 1/2 the property and the kids......
I'm not saying it justifies the situation, but a spouse taken for granted is a spouse set up to cheat.
This is the category you are in right now. Be careful how you proceed.
If you don't think your husband will ever change, then have a frank discussion with him about a couple options: 1) an open marriage, 2) an amicable divorce 3) working on your relationship together.
Why put both of yourselves through the trouble of an affair and messy divorce. If you've truely grown apart, then do the adult thing and address it (however the two of you see fit).
If there are kids involved, be sure to take them into account as well.
Do you just like the attention, or do you want more? If the answer is more than flirting, then you have some hard choices ahead for the two of you.
But, way to blame your husband for you wanting to step out. You must be a woman in a man's clothing.....
2007-07-24 15:24:24 · answer #2 · answered by aa889d 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
enjoying the attention can only be a good thing. we all need a little bit of reassurance or self esteem booster and people paying attention to us can do that to you. Just make sure it doesn't go any further ... unless of course it is what you want. as for your husband, no it is not "just the way he is" i bet he paid a lot more attention to you when you guys first dated, or even now when he wants something from you. a little note here a little card there a little positive comment about your hair or your dress shouldn't kill him. tell him what you feel and this time don't say "it s OK it s just the way you are"
2007-07-24 21:58:09 · answer #3 · answered by caliguy_30 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well if it is the way he is, you hve a decision to make. Is this attention thing a deal breaker? Is it worth edning your marriage over?
Or can you enjoy the attention from other men without it causing greater grief?
Only you can decide that.
2007-07-24 15:20:58 · answer #4 · answered by teritaur 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Depends on the attention your getting, I mean if your just enjoying random men flirting without letting it go to your head or acting on it then dont worry about it. but if your going out, and asking for the attention then thats not cool. Maybe if you spent time giving your man attention, instead of other men, maybe he would give it back to you.
2007-07-24 15:21:30 · answer #5 · answered by donnakygirl 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Attention is definitely good for your self-esteem, maybe you should try to show your husband how other men desire you, so he can remember what he has and protect his investment before its too late.
2007-07-24 17:11:34 · answer #6 · answered by secrettreasure 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, it's a slippery slope and you need to be careful. You should be talking to your hubby ... don't try to make him jealous by mentioning this other attention or he'll just resent you and clam up.
Good luck!
2007-07-24 15:19:12 · answer #7 · answered by Random_Girl 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Its ok to take the attention,..work it to the edge, just don't step over the line, because you can 'never' go back. Happy flirting!
2007-07-24 15:19:27 · answer #8 · answered by Mr.OldGuy 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
enjoy the attention, as long as you are not going to take it a step further by cheating. You have already talked to him, so he knows how you feel.
2007-07-24 15:18:20 · answer #9 · answered by princess m 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
There's nothing wrong with getting a little attention but I would cringe if I saw that my wife wrote that!
2007-07-24 15:19:29 · answer #10 · answered by No Lies 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋