If you think trouble is a cat in a tree
And the worst pain of all is the sting of a bee
If you think a problem is a broken nail
If an ordeal is a letter lost in the mail
If tradgedy is you missed the bus
If an unruly rooms causes out-of-hand fuss
If a rip-off is buying overpriced shoes
Then this is going to be way more than news.
Getting sick can be more than a cough
A switch can mean more than to turn on or off
Starving may not be quite what you think
A cold glass of water may not be a drink
Sometimes our messes get a bit out of hand
And grow into issues beyond our command
What a child calls a crush may rise above
And change from, "I like you" to a thing called, "love"
Not everything is what it may seem
Be prepared for surprises when you wake from your dream
thanks
♥audreyanna
p.s.
i'm 11, so u know .
2007-07-24 06:10:56 · 16 answers · asked by Anonymous in Arts & Humanities ➔ Poetry
my inspiration was my mom's close friend. she has non-hopkins-lymphoma
2007-07-24 06:54:26 · update #1
Wow 11... that ROCKED girlie! Keep writin' like that and you could make it a career.
2007-07-24 06:17:06 · answer #1 · answered by Jess 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Have you ever considered being a poet? That is some good stuff. Only a skilled poet or writer could write something like that. I give you 5 stars/ 5 stars! You should consider submitting some of your work. One day I could picture you as a wonderful poet or author. I'll look for your name!
2007-07-24 13:34:39 · answer #2 · answered by Emma 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
when you rhyme in meter you have to tap it out
with your finger tips, each syllable is a beat.
this has a few missteps in it.
so try to fix them with filler words or different words
*******
if you think a problem is a broken nail
if an ordeal is a letter lost in the mail
should be
if you think a problem is your broken nail
or a letter thats missing and lost in the mail...
*(*****
they should match syllable for syllable...
beat for beat
2007-07-24 13:16:34 · answer #3 · answered by get_christie_love 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I liked ur poem very much.
i am happy to listen such inspired from a girl at an age of 11.
well done
2007-07-24 13:19:28 · answer #4 · answered by rahul 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
WoW! It's great! Id be interested in hearing what inspired you to write it!
Keep up the good work! Very talented for your age!
2007-07-24 13:14:59 · answer #5 · answered by Familiar_Suspect 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I love it.
John 17:3.
2007-07-24 13:17:42 · answer #6 · answered by itsmissjackson 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are only 11? Wow, keep working, you have a lot of raw talent! Keep writing and developing your gift!
and yes, I like your poem!
2007-07-24 13:17:47 · answer #7 · answered by GiGi! 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You go girl !
Keep writing.
I can tell that you are a sensitive ,thoughtful person. Looks as if you pay attention in school too!
2007-07-24 13:25:18 · answer #8 · answered by Bemo 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
That is truly wonderful! I thought you were like 15 or so! WOW!
2007-07-24 13:15:24 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
iy was great 4 ur age, i was also wondering about your mp4 player question....
does it say (mp4 digital player) on the front below the screen in silver
2007-07-24 21:32:53 · answer #10 · answered by bob 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋