to think this money could straigten Donny and Molly's beaver teeth, replace the windows in the house my husband said my brother did a poor job on and perhaps let me have a bedroom set that is NOT from a 1984 garage sale........
Help, I feel like having a hissy fit. I don't want to ruin vacation (we leave next week for the first time in 3 years) but I am really mad that he feels like this is his money to spend without any imput from me (his company closed and the funds were available)
Thanks and I will hear from you truck lovin men too (:
2007-07-24 05:23:33 · 16 answers · asked by donny_mollysmom 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Apologies here, some how when I went in to fix a typo, the question posted twice. Sorry about that!
2007-07-24 05:40:31 · update #1
We are not retiring! We are both in our early forties. The money became available when the company he worked for closed. He has a new job --
Donny and Molly are luckily nice looking kids who could use braces! The little piggy in the picture came along in June ( I am sure he will need them too but we have to see teeth first!) so we can't all ride in our Jeep anymore (seats 4)
I appreciate your thoughtful answers, YOU REALLY made me feel better and I was able to laugh about it.
2007-07-24 05:53:32 · update #2
Wow, that's not very smart. He should roll the money over into another retirement account. That truck will be old and warn out when he's ready to retire.
2007-07-24 05:40:40 · answer #1 · answered by **Llola** 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The two of you have children together so buying a truck is not the best of ideas. The family will eventually out grow the truck and there will be no room for all of the family to ride in it, if there will be when he buys the truck.
I agree some of the money needs to go on the both of you getting some thing that you want that you could not normally afford. He does need to be responsible and save some of the money to do things that have to be done. If this his his retirement money some of it should go back into savings, or when it is time for him to retire he will be flat broke.
2007-07-24 12:36:47 · answer #2 · answered by Cristy 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
OK - calmly - discuss the money. The minute he purchases a truck, he loses money. Buying a truck is not an investment - it's an expense - plainly put - it's money down the drain.
Offer suggestions. Find some retirement calculators and show that if he put *half* of the money away, how much it could earn over time. Show how little social security is. Perhaps - leaving half to spend which means he doesn't feel neglected.
However, depending upon the state, if the money is in his name only and the state doesn't require spousal approval, you may just have to accept his actions.
2007-07-24 12:29:52 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
First of all, is a vehicle needed? If so, then do not say anything about it. If not, then you two should split the money down the middle. However, you said something about getting the children's teeth fixed, if it is needed, then that is what the money should be spent on. Wait until after the vacation to say anything about it if it can wait. Tell him that you thing the two of you should sit and compromise on what to spend the money on. I think that it should be put up in a IRA for use with retirement so that you do not lose retirement money. Trust me, it will be needed when you do retire.
2007-07-24 12:30:57 · answer #4 · answered by Angelic Valentine 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
When he does retire in about 20 years he is going to be $x short. Does he realize this? Is the truck brand new? Even buying a year old truck is still saving money. Perhaps his new job will have a better dental insurance for your children. I'm sorry your bedroom set is ancient. Have you thought about fixing it up some? A lot of do it yourself websites...or looking on www.craigslist.com or www.freecycle.org people give away free stuff like this all the time...depending on your location.
2007-07-24 13:11:35 · answer #5 · answered by i_b_winkn_at_u 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I understand your pain! I don't think that you are being irrational try to get the children's teeth corrected and the windows replaced. I also realize how wonderful it would be to have a new bedroom set. The only thing that men see is the small picture. Oooohhhh i have extra money, I've always loved that truck, I've worked for it, I'm going to get it. I would go on vacation first, and after you get back try to sit down and offer some suggestion on other things that could be done with the money. Good Luck to you!!
2007-07-24 12:36:02 · answer #6 · answered by frawlicious 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Actually, he's acting in an irrational manner.
That said, you two need counseling more than Donny and Molly need their teeth straightened - and who are Donny & Molly? Are they your CHILDREN? If so, then he shouldn't be retiring. IF they're grandchildren - then it's D & M's parents who should decide that orthodonture is important - not you.
But you two need counseling.
Maybe it's because his company closed down and he feels that he can control buying the truck - since he couldn't control the economy.
IF the deal isn't yet finalized, call the auto store immediately and speak with the director of sales. The LAST thing he wants is to become embroiled in a domestic issue - so he's liable to listen to you. Just don't be irrational.
Otherwise, just accept that your normally pretty cool husband is out of control right now.
You really need to go to counseling.
2007-07-24 12:35:13 · answer #7 · answered by Barbara B 7 · 1⤊ 1⤋
I dont know how old you are but he may have done a serious oversight fi we are talking about 401(k). If you take the money out of your retirement fund you pay the taxes as if it was income + 10% penalty.
that would make for a very expensive truck I would think.
He needs to transfer them to an IRA to not incur huge tax burden and he has a time limit.
Personally, I would not touch my retirement fund until I am ready to retire.
Good Luck.
2007-07-24 12:30:24 · answer #8 · answered by Dimitar A 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well i see it this way.....you work all those years and at the end you should get something you want .only if the family is taken care of.......now a new bedroom suit is NOT something you really need (at least you have a bed) windows in the house (you have windows) teeth to be corrected thats something you have insurance for and maybe the kids like it. so sorry but i will support the truck option , it will benifit everyone in the family unlike the other things
2007-07-24 12:33:20 · answer #9 · answered by $martA$$.com 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well it sounds to me that when he is going to be needing that money, then he will have already spent it. He needs to put in an account to use for when the 2 of you are retired instead of spending all the money just because it is there. It needs to be put away in a separate account for your latter years. this is the smart thing to do.
2007-07-24 12:32:02 · answer #10 · answered by mrs_endless 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋