As I've said before when I'm home everything is just normal or my husband is in and out. I went out of town to help with my class reunions fund raiser: he complained to his friend it was a waste of gas, I went to visit my mom and old friends: he complained it was a wasted trip, I flew to MD to be in a friend's wedding (he decided not to go): he complained about things that went wrong at home andhad an attitude with me, but he goes out of town almost every month with his friends without me. Why is it a problem for ME to go, and I'm ok with him going and never have an attitude or say anything petty behind his back about it? I barely go anywhere, but when I do it's a problem unless it's work related. What's the deal?
2007-07-24 04:33:19 · 16 answers · asked by Kisses 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
In his mind, his trips are more important than yours are. It's that simple. Your husband is living by the old double standard. He's acting like a child. Don't let him get to you. Just keep doing what you're doing and if he gripes about it tell him if you stop your travels, he'll have to stop his. Good luck!
2007-07-24 04:38:20 · answer #1 · answered by katydid 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
OK.... so it seems like your there to take care of the house and kids, your the maid and nanny. He has very little value for you and what you do, sounds like he is complacent and doesn't give a crap. Get a clue girlfriend ........ why does he feel the need to go out of town so much with his friends ..... I think it is time you start to ask some questions ...... I think your starting to finally "feel" what going on ...... get a private detective to follow him on his next "outing" with his friends. I am sure your eyes will be opened up abit.
2007-07-24 11:39:33 · answer #2 · answered by Answer Girl 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Some guys are possessive like that.
Have you pointed out to your husband with specific examples of places he's gone and the fact that you haven't raised a fuss about it? Let him know how it makes you feel when you hear complaints about you going places. Try to talk about your feelings rather than being accusatory.
2007-07-24 11:37:58 · answer #3 · answered by Kiwi 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Maybe he has a problem with you going places because he is not acting like a good husband when he goes out with his buddies...and because of that he thinks you are acting the same as he does. Or he could just be a controling ***.
2007-07-24 11:47:56 · answer #4 · answered by swtlilblonde31 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm touch by your politeness in explananing this whole situation. I'll sugest you have a deep talk with your husband about it all - maintain the politeness. Only he has the real answer to what the deal is.
All the best!
2007-07-24 11:49:45 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Typical double standard. I just got the same thing form my hubby this last weekend. I have decided that this is his problem to deal with. I am not even out of town, just hanging out with the girls.
2007-07-24 11:45:27 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Quite honestly, he sounds kind of controlling. Some women don't see it, but sometimes men think they "own" their wives. I've seen it myself, from having to "approve" the clothes they buy, to this exact behaivor....making it nearly impossible for you to go somewhere w/out them, and making you feel guilty for wanting to do it.
You need to talk to him. Ask him the exact question you're asking us! "Honey, why is it ok for you to go out of town and not for me? I don't have a problem w/ you going somewhere, but what are your problems w/ me leaving?" etc. See through the excuses (waste of gas, etc, that's an excuse) and get to the underlying reason he's not telling you.
2007-07-24 11:41:17 · answer #7 · answered by Dj 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your husband is a control freak. You were put on this earth to serve him any action inconsistent with that objective is wrong and a waste. He want s you to serve him. Also, when he leave with his friends, you are commanded to miss him until he returns.
2007-07-24 11:40:17 · answer #8 · answered by Willie J 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You married an insecure control freak.
He's probably insecure because he's afraid that you will do the things he does when he goes out without you...like cheating perhaps?
2007-07-24 11:40:01 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
He hasn't grown up yet. You are the more mature of the marriage. Too bad you didn;t have time before you married him, to see what he was really like. Get counseling, try to work it out.
2007-07-24 11:37:56 · answer #10 · answered by randy 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋