I want a truthful answer ... did anyone marry someone they like a lot, respect, don't mind being with and are attracted to ... but who they are NOT in "love" (that ethereal super-deep bond and desire beyond lust that people talk about) with?
Did you maybe marry when you were not in love but grow to love them? Or did the "like" degenerate into "dislike"?
Any feedback along these lines would be appreciated.
2007-07-24 04:09:34 · 10 answers · asked by Random_Girl 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I thought I knew what love was, and didn't really understand how to love until me husband showed me unconditional love.
2007-07-24 04:17:24 · answer #1 · answered by islandgirl God and family 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
When I was first married 29 years ago, yes I did love my wife. Or at least I thought I did.
I relate it to this, that she was the only girl that I truly wanted to have sex with. Before I met her I ran away from situations where sex would have been part of the mix.
We got married and for a time I was truly happy. Then her father died and her mom was diagnosed with Alzheimer's and she needed to take care of her mom. I discovered many things over the years. The least of which is how ignored in our married life I am.
If I ask her to do something for me, she always says yes, but I always have to do the something that I asked her to do for me. I found out just how "indifferent" she is to me three years ago. I got terribly ill to the point of believing that I was dying. I had a mirage of medical problems all pop up at one time and my doctor thought I belonged in the hospital.
For the entire 7 days I was in the hospital, She spent a total of 9 hours with me. I guess that tells me a lot. The women who I had 4 children with and the only person I wanted to have sex with and I haven't had intercourse in close to 7 years.
Yet I have been with her for so long, I do not know how to leave. I would do so in a minute if I felt it would not cost me the love of my 4 children and I am afraid it would.
Added after reading Kimmers:
I guess I agree with her, We have grown apart and are more like room mates then hubby and wife.
2007-07-24 11:27:24 · answer #2 · answered by mikeae 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I did not love my first husband. I married him because at the time I thought I would not be able to find any one to love me and my baby. This was put in my head by an ex. About 2 months after we were married I realized I was just depressed about several things that had happened recently (the adoption of my 2nd baby being one) and I booted him out.
2007-07-24 11:29:32 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
I think that in a long term relationships you will fall in and out of love with the person several times. There has been many times in my relationship, sometimes for months at a time where i thought to myself, do i really love this person? but then something happens and you realize how much you really do love him.
2007-07-24 11:17:28 · answer #4 · answered by ~NIKKI~ 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Yes. It degenerated into a dislike.
2007-07-24 11:24:44 · answer #5 · answered by boyplakwatsa.com 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
NO I wouldn't marry someone that i didn't love to me marriage is not something to be taken lightly its forever so why wast forever with someone you don't love? in Married you love is supposed to grow as times goes on not decrees. don't marry someone if you don't think your truly in love or your life will be a living he!!
2007-07-24 12:11:51 · answer #6 · answered by nikie_atkinson 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
My answer would be the same as Kimmers. We have grown sooooooo far apart in the past few years. It was there when we got married, but no longer.
2007-07-24 11:25:23 · answer #7 · answered by I love winter 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I love my husband with all my being and love myself too much to not have married someone I did not love.
2007-07-24 11:15:31 · answer #8 · answered by Answer Girl 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I am not in love with my husband. We have grown apart. We are more like roommates now and friends - then husband and wife. I care about him - but there is no love there what-so-ever.
2007-07-24 11:17:41 · answer #9 · answered by kimmer727 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
no, we are in love, but the love I have for my hubby is more now than when I married him....
2007-07-24 11:15:14 · answer #10 · answered by ladybug 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋