What 10-15 things you should ensure when selecting a life-partner or soul-mate?

Question

This decision could be the greatest and most important you would ever make in your entire life? The right decision would result in celebrating silver and golden wedding anniversaries which are treasured? Intense and serious feedback appreciated from both married and non-married persons.

Edit::
Great inputs folks!

For: THE SILVERFOX
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Just to say 'love' is too simplistic and life is really more complex. Perhaps you could kindly say more what do you look for in such a partner? Aim for BA!

Answer 1

1 they love you for who you are
2 not a golddigger
3 you have similar morals
4 they are respectful
5 that they are not spoiled
6 not abusive
7 not addicted to anything
8 same views on having children
9 they are not needy
10 they make you happy (most of the time)
11 that you have known them long enough to grasp who they really are
12 you are physically attracted (duh)

Answer 2

Here's what my mom began to drill into my head when I reached 13... It is more apropo to a woman than a man, but food for thought for you?

1. The most important decision you will ever make is in the choice of a spouse... choose with your head as well as your heart.

2. Have no children until your bond is strong... kids can destroy anything. And have no more than you yourself can support ... you may just have to. And any marriage is complete without them...You trade a lot to have a achild... $250,000 each, with no guarantee that the child will first of all be healthy, and secondly, even like you when it is grown. Most are ungrateful.... look at your friends.

3. At all costs finish your education to qualify for those good jobs... your education and children are forever...husbands, lovers and promises are not.

4. Have a stash of cash no one knows about even if you are sure you will never need it... you will, and the more the better.

I think what makes marriages work is planning, and a general agreement in philosophy. Marriages that are most successful are between couples that are alike -- particularly in religion, politics, and how money ought to be spent. Nice also is the agreement on children.... none, one or whatever.

Christine's list is good, I had one as well
non-smoker, no kids either, I didn't wish to deal with the ex stuff, have a job he liked, liberal politics and religion, nice teeth (love a killer smile) and a given as far as a car, suit, etc.

Answer 3

Okay,

I didn't get married until in my 30's, which was a cause for great conversation in my family. My family decided I was too picky.

To prove a point I actually developed a 'list' of qualifications. I will share this with you. This list is in no particular order.

1. He must own a suit. (not that he wears it daily, but understands that in this world, there are occasions that call for a suit)

2. he must have a job. (no mention of salary, or type of work- just that he has a job and does his best at it.)

3. he must have a decent mode of transportation. (not talking about a convertible..but a reliable, dependable car that shows he understands the importance of being responsible and is able to get to work)

4. he must have a sense of humor.

5. He must have decent teeth. Seriously- oral hygiene is important.

6. He must be able to walk up 2 flights of stairs without passing out or having a heart attack.

7. No kids. I didn't want to deal with whole ex thing. Nothing wrong with kids- but I've been the stepchild and its just all complicated and wasn't worth it to me.

8. Must believe in God. Doesn't mean he has to practice a particular religion, but does have faith and believes in the "more" that is out there.

9. Can name 3 of the last five presidents. And must have voted in at least one presidental election.

10. can talk about something other than sports and ex's.

That's my list.

My family decided I wasn't being "too" picky after all.

Answer 4

I will tell you that you have way over thought this issue. there are only three important things that you need in a good life partner.1) Trust 2) Committment 3)Honesty. If you can manage only those three things you will have many of those anniversaries and yes, even the golden. all of the other things would just be benefits but if you get lost in searching for all those things you will sacrafice the three basics to a successful marriage. Don't spend your life hunting for the perfect partner because if you do you will not find it. Find the basics and watch the benefits grow that is the other 12 things you are looking for.

Answer 5

1) Honesty
2) Faithfulness
3) Trust
4) Open lines of communication
5) Enjoy each others company
6) Some common interests
7) Family oriented
8) Career minded
9) Openess to new ideas
10) Love

Answer 6

You don't need a list of things for a life partner or soulmate. Hubby and I base ours on love, honesty, mutual respect and good intentions on both sides to make our lives together successful. Of course we have our arguments but which couple don't? While the sex side of things is great, our relationship is not based solely on that.

Answer 7

1 my mom always said
"if you love them for their strange habits instead of inspite of them, then they're a keeper"
2 they are your safety net
3 you are a better person around them
4 your favorite thing to do together is discuss anything and nothing
5 you would be proud to be in there shadow
6 you never have to be in there shadow
7 you dont have to defend your actions to them
8 you are more than happy to explain them
9 they give you 100% of themselves
10 you happily give them 110%

Answer 8

- love
- compatibility
- age (if your 13 and he is 89, then he might be into different things in the future)
- their health (if they are a smoker)
- their attitudes to relationships
- personality
- appearence (you have to be attracted to them)
- cant think of anymore

Answer 9

First I would be very sure he didn't do any illegal activites.
And lastly, he would be compassionate.

Answer 10

single here.. that would b just one thing. love. in my opion