I am getting married in a few months and my sex life sucks. My finance treats me so great but in the sack he is all about himself. I am shy and so its hard for my to be blunt about it but i have told him and he appologizes and keeps on with his ways. I dont think i am fighting fair becuase i have gotten so aggravated I have withheld sex. I have never gotten an orgasm and seem to only be giving oral...guys how do I stop this cycle???
2007-07-23 16:27:18 · 9 answers · asked by MadKat 4 in Health ➔ Men's Health
Make him wait until you've orgasmed. If he can't do that, then explain to him that you need an orgasm before he goes off and then gets limp. He should be able to understand that. Whether he gets you off with his tongue, finger, or penis, you need to be satisfied first. Then he can *** later. That way works for me with my girlfriends.
2007-07-24 03:06:59 · answer #1 · answered by sunsetstreamsky 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
it is never good to withhold sex in a relationship. I am sure you will agree it is better to work out the problems. One thing that helps insure a good marriage is good communication so that needs to be first on your list of things to learn as a wife. If you two really love each other it should not be too difficult to learn to open up and discuss most anything without being judgmental or starting a fight. Your pleasure is as important as his. Many men are satisfied to take care of them self so you two have to talk about that and see what can be worked out to insure you both get what you expect from sexual relations. Try to work out things that would slow him down and speed you up. A good goal to work for and challenge each other to accomplish is a joint orgasm. This is hard to do and may occur only on rare occasions but it is fun trying. When one beats the other to orgasm then you can have a plan or plans for how the other one is going to reach their orgasm. Sex toys, can be a big help for you, and maybe even for him. One little trick I have found works for oral sex is have him take care of your first then you return the favor. Once a man has an orgasm it is not unusual for him to lose interest so you need to find ways to keep him in the mood. All of this can be a lot of fun in bed, and is what you are looking for. It all starts with communication and trust that you can freely talk to each other about anything.
2007-07-24 00:45:31 · answer #2 · answered by K K 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If a man truly loves his woman he will make sure that she gets off before he does. If he does get off first... a real man will do what it takes to get her off - usually by oral stimulation if he can't keep it up after ejaculation.
If your man doesn't bring you to an orgasm, you have a big problem that needs to be discussed and worked out before you to marry or you marriage will be a great disappointment.
Best of Luck!
2007-07-24 00:35:34 · answer #3 · answered by J R 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think this is a tough one because sex is virtually always a touchy subject. Peoples feelings tend to be hurt easily with sex, even guys, though they may not admit that. I personally think it is best to approach him about this subject, but never in the heat of the moment or even in bed. It is something that needs to be done with caution, such as over morning coffee perhaps or something. It will also be better to approach this not from the standpoint as something he is doing necessarily wrong, perhaps just something you'd like to work on or improve on. I hope that is of some help! Best wishes! :)
2007-07-23 23:35:40 · answer #4 · answered by Julian D 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Try introducing sex toys into the bedroom, if you are both open to the idea. It is a great way to get him interested in pleasuring you. Start small if you're intimidated - like a vibrating bullet. You should really try to work this out with him BEFORE the wedding if possible.
2007-07-23 23:38:56 · answer #5 · answered by Missy 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Push him for more foreplay on you.
I agree with the sex toys idea. One thing you can look into is a pocket rocket (By Doc Johnson, not a motorcycle)
It won't make him feel less of a man, plus you can use it on yourself while he is doing his thing with you.
2007-07-23 23:47:24 · answer #6 · answered by jmw1977 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
New rule: You don't get it until KitKat does!
Or let him know that you haven't orgasmed with him yet and see if he takes up the challenge
2007-07-24 00:23:05 · answer #7 · answered by skip22h 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
When he is done masturbate right in front of him. Tell him you haven't been satisfied yet and you deserve to be after satisfying him all the time.
2007-07-24 01:15:07 · answer #8 · answered by Solo 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Why not ask him to go "down" on you?
2007-07-23 23:46:04 · answer #9 · answered by Ask me anything 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋