i don't know how to live like this. never thought i am going to go thru this **** in my marriage. after some things that i caught him lying about i wonder what else is he lying to me. its eating at me everyday. i am pregnant. i try to relaz but my mind changes every second. he swore he won't do whatever he did to me before. like treat me like **** or make me cry but how do i know that he won;t change after couple of months. u know how after i stop bugging him he will start treating me the same way he used to. what can i do. what shuld i do. been married 2 years i look at him and think this man looked so genuine and honest. and now he is a lil boy who lies. and denies. he will never admit to any wrong doing in future.i need good long advice to calm me down
2007-07-23 11:05:22 · 9 answers · asked by baby doll 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Honestly... i think the hormones are speaking... Calm down... Think about all the good he has done... don't let 1 mistake ruin all that you have... Maybe you need to alone romantic time...A nice dinner to remind you how much of a gentleman he was and is!!!!
2007-07-23 11:12:22 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
Monica, it sounds like you're completely hormonal, which is so typical in pregnancy. I'm so sorry you're feeling this badly right now, but I had horrible days when I was pregnant as well. I thought there was no way my husband could ever love me, I thought he was lying to me all the time as well. He wasn't.
And, I've been married for almost 20 years, there are still days when my hubby treats me like sh&*, and makes me cry. Granted, it doesn't happen all that often, and not nearly as often as it did when we were first married, but he's a human being too, and we all mess up at time, and treat those we love the most the worst.
If you have serious issues where you cannot trust him though, then you guys seriously need marriage counseling. I know for a fact that a marriage cannot survive if the couple can't trust each other. You'll have to trust him even more with the baby--because not only will he have to care for you, but your baby as well.
Just try to calm down--go read a good book, take a long shower, listen to some relaxing music, do whatever you need to in order to relax. Being this upset isn't good for you or the baby. Remember, you have to take care of that baby in you right now--let other things slide for now. Hang in there!
2007-07-23 11:25:13 · answer #2 · answered by basketcase88 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Monica, you seem a very sweet woman and smart. If you suspect something is wrong with your relationship or thinking that your husband is fooling around or lying to you, just because your pregnant...I think its time for a change. I know it's hard because you are carrying his baby, dont be fool twice, once a liar, always be a liar. And it is not your fault that things turned this way, but you can put to stop somewhere. Don't stress out yourself now since you are pregnant but just give him warnings that if he keeps fooling around with you that you will be move on with your life. Just do what's best for you and for your baby. I wish you the best for you.
Let him know that love is always new and while he's fooling around your love goes to someone new.
2007-07-25 09:32:39 · answer #3 · answered by AB 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I had this same problem. I caught my husband lying and it took me over 2 years to let it go. Actually, if I'm truly honest, I still don't trust him completely. If he says he's just at work, I wonder where he really is. It's hard but it took a lot of compromise from both of us to make it work. I asked him to call me regularly (though he found this annoying he did it for me), he would let me check his email, bank records, credit cards, etc. until I was satisfied that he was telling the truth. It was a bit awkward but we finally got through it.
2007-07-23 11:27:57 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I suggest you both try counseling. However, if you have a gut instinct that something may not be right, it may be time to get out before you get hurt. I hate to say it, but most of the time things like this get worse before they get better. If he is being disrespectful or mistreating you, it will get worse. If he is lying, he is hiding something. Demand respect. Either he respect you, or he leaves. You don't want your child around someone that disrespects you.
2007-07-23 11:15:23 · answer #5 · answered by lwomar 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I you are that unhappy, and he is not will to make changes then why not leave. If you can not work things out after that then file for divorce and find a man that deserves you.
2007-07-23 11:29:12 · answer #6 · answered by K K 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
sweetie you dont need to go through this no one needs to go through that its a threat to you and your unborn child. you guys need to work out your probloms or get a devorce if it does not get fixed soon your child could get hurt soon. i hope you can understand were i am comming from best of luck.
2007-07-23 11:23:43 · answer #7 · answered by Crystal D 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋
hmmm...u have a loser that needs to be thrown away...become the strong woman ur mother and father would want u to be and leave his no good lyin assss
2007-07-23 11:13:04 · answer #8 · answered by dan m 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Fool me once, shame on you>Fool me twice, shame on me*....
2007-07-23 11:37:55 · answer #9 · answered by dca2003311@yahoo.com 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋