My husband used to be quite the sex-crazed maniac,as most men were, or are. Now, we are 2 years into our relationship, both of us are 30. He claims that he just doesn't have any sex-drive. He's taken Enzyte, and all the others, but, viagra just makes him miserable for hours, due to the erection, but there's still no drive. Is there anything in particular that may help him? Has anyone else gone through this? It honestly makes me feel like it's me. Like he's not attracted to me. He says that's not the case. I'm afraid that this may lead to bigger issues for our future if we don't fix the issue now!! My appetite is VERY INSATIABLE, and I'm starving! HELP!
2007-07-23 06:43:00 · 18 answers · asked by Jay 1 in Health ➔ Men's Health
ok, he doesn't have a problem getting it up. The problem is getting it started. If I initiate, he makes comments like ".....you make it like a chore", and things like that. I've tried role playing, dress up, oral, suggesting 3somes, etc. His drive is just not there. He's not overweight, and doesn't do any kind of drug. Is it possible he's just bored with it all? Is that even humanly possible???!!
2007-07-23 07:06:05 · update #1
He may have low testosterone levels. He should consult his doctor. No man on earth at age 30 should have a low sex drive, or need viagra to achieve a *****. He may have circulation problems, heart problems, hypertension, and depression.
2007-07-23 06:52:46 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I'm confused, he has an erection but no drive? Viagra will not give you an erection nor will it make an erection stay, it only makes it possible to have one. There has to be some sort of stimulation to erect, even with Viagra the erection will go away when the stimulation is removed. That means if he's getting hard, he is getting aroused. For some reason he doesn't want sex. You say you are insatiable, could he be afraid of not being able to keep up? Does he not want you to be aggressive? Could he have a preference for masturbation? There are many avenues to explore here. Good luck.
2007-07-23 07:07:03 · answer #2 · answered by Solo 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If the drugs don't help him, then maybe look for a more natural approach. If he is over weight, this could cause him to not be sexual. If he eats fatty foods, and things like that, it could also keep him from getting an erection. If he has high colesterol, that could block the blood flow and keep him from getting an erection.
If that isn't the case, then it might be something else. If he masterbates, have him stop. If he isn't telling you he masterbates, then that might be the problem there. He is wasting it on himself and not you.
The only thing I could suggest is to have him not do anything for about a week. Then, watch some erotic movies, and then you could dress up and go down on him, and go from there. make him more comfortable with it, and make him ok with not able to get it up.
This isn't the best idea, but one way you could rally find something out is if you invite another woman into your bedroom, if he gets it up then, then I would say its you, but like I said, that probably wouldn't work.
Ok, if he says your making it into a chore, I can understand how that is, my gf will tell me that she wants to have sex now, there isn't anything to get me started either, however, I get going once we start.
If he was bored with you, the 3some should have got him interested. Maybe have a friend come over and flirt with him. Or, better yet, find a woman, who is attractive, and thinks he is attractive and have her flirt with him. See if that might get his motor started, then he might want to come home and do you. Especially if the girls touches him in certain areas, and dresses sexy. He could be slightly bored with you, but if he is still getting it up, I doubt that. He just needs something different. You could try different positions, let him try anal, maybe you poke a finger in his butt. It could help him.
2007-07-23 06:56:16 · answer #3 · answered by George P 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
As men age their testostrone, that they once had when they were at the prime of their life, tends to decrease. It doesn't sound normal to have no sex drive ever but check with a doctor to see if the problem stems from something other than just low testostrone also while your at it, try doing new sexually. It could just be that he's been stressed about something that may be taking a tole on his life. If you have not seeked medical attention I would advise that first it doesn't necessarily have to be a family doctor, you could try a sex therapist. A lot of females tend to have self guilt when their partner is no longer able to obtain an erection or if their partner is just not in the mood. I don't think it is your fault. Just stick with it and be patient, as hard as that may seem.
2007-07-23 07:01:23 · answer #4 · answered by ? 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Have him try Horny Goat Weed (yes the name is wierd) it is a natural herb that has been in use for thousands of years without any harmful side effects. It does the same thing as Viagra (inhibits the the activity of PDE-5), but in a different way and on a smaller scale. The main use is to restore sexual vitality to middle aged men. You can get it over the counter.
2007-07-23 08:19:22 · answer #5 · answered by KC 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well he is not interesting any more in having sex with you, first maybe check if is a sex problem related with the enzyte, or the other is a personal problem with u -another affair- otherwise go to your doctor and see the problem.
2 years is nothing maybe 5 or 10 or 20 years make the difference but 2 years is nothing..75% of the lack of sex in that period of time is because he or she has another lover.
2007-07-23 07:47:39 · answer #6 · answered by Ronald 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
All the other answers are very good, however there is also the possibility there is someone else.
Hopefully this is not the case, but do not be naive. Be aware of things such as him working out more, buying better underwear, better wardrobe, better grooming, excuses to run errands, working longer hours, etc. You get the idea.
2007-07-23 07:05:03 · answer #7 · answered by Xavier61 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i'm a girl but it sounds like an imbalance of some kind because at about that time i was like that and my husband went through it too. ours passed but if you can have his hormone levels checked and testosterone checked you should find the answer but first can you tell me if you both have been under any stress? don't be so pushy with wanting sex and he might start wanting you again.
2007-07-23 06:52:10 · answer #8 · answered by isabellekateystar 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This fellow should have a psychiatric evaluation. If he will go jointly with you, that's fine.
But if not, encourage him to go alone. And then do not prod him about what went on with the doctor,
Give him space. He has things on his mind....
2007-07-23 07:20:18 · answer #9 · answered by s a v v y__44 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You should know by now what turns your man on. If you have such an appetite for sex why don't you initiate sex?
Sometimes all a man needs or want is for his woman to take him.
2007-07-23 06:51:02 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋