I'm pregnant with me second child - a girl, I have a boy who is 2. Like most people, I have a best friend - we're so close we refer to each other as sisters and have been close for 10 years.
The thing is from about the age of 13 (now 21) I have liked the name Taylor for a girl. 2 years ago when I became pregnant with my son, my best friend was also pregnant. However she lost her baby, she said if it was a girl she would call her Taylor!!! I was so upset as that was the name I had planned for my baby, if it was a girl.
She tells everyone how she loves this name & its what her daughter will be called, I dont think she realises I liked this name first! Only now I'm pregnant with a girl. I don't know if I should call her Taylor but if I do it might look as if I'm being selfish. I don't want to hurt her but I have always liked this name. Should I call my daughter Taylor or should I look for another name?
2007-07-23
03:47:29
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82 answers
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asked by
Janine
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in
Pregnancy & Parenting
➔ Baby Names
Just to clear things up, its not what I would call my best friends 'dead daughter', she was 4 weeks when she miscarried. How could anyone possibly know she was carrying a girl? Like I state I have ALWAYS liked the name., however I just didn't say it out aloud first. My daughters name doesn't 'HAVE' to be Taylor, it's just something I would love her name to be. I will talk to my friend about it but I just wanted to know if it was even worth bringing up the fact that I want to call my daughter that or should I drop it altogether and look for another name?
2007-07-24
08:08:42 ·
update #1
I think you should talk it over with your friend and explain it to her just like you did with us. If she still is insistent on naming her baby Taylor, if it is a girl, then maybe you can use the name Taylor for her middle name.
2007-07-23 05:22:29
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answer #1
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answered by Sparkles_65 4
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I can see where you're coming from, and I think you must be a lovely friend to worry so much about your friend. If you are very close to each other, as you said, then maybe if you talked it through with your friend she would see that you weren't being selfish, you just wanted the best name for your baby. Tell her that just because you have called your baby girl Taylor, it doesn't mean that if she has a girl in the future she can't call it Taylor too. If she is still really against the idea then maybe come to a compromise and give your baby a different first name, and maybe use Taylor as a middle name. You don't want to break such a good friendship after all these years so be careful how you approach the subject.
Good luck with the baby! xx
2007-07-23 10:44:15
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answer #2
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answered by Anonymous
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So you and your friend end up both liking the same name, not surprising you probably like a lot of the same things, that's why you are friends. So you name your child taylor, there is no law, or even ethical problem with you both using the same name. It may get a little confusing (I have two cousins named tina, the same age). If you are such great friends she won't be upset. However if you only thought you were great friends, then she might be. Better to know now then after 11 years of friendship.
She may not even get pregnant with a girl, and so your child ends up with a different name because she might have had a girl, or Taylor might not be as common by the time she has a girl and she might have picked a different name.
Just tell her, you have always dreamed of having a little girl named taylor (only when you are sure you are using that name) and since you know how much she likes the name, you won't be offended if she wants to name her future daughter taylor. They can be called the Tayls when they are together, or you can use their middle names when they are together Taylor-Marie and Taylor-Michele etc.
2007-07-31 03:44:44
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answer #3
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answered by Lauren R 1
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I think that if you like the name then you should use it. If you guys are best friends then she will understand. Also you could also name your daughter that as a remembrance to her daughter that she lost. That way you both can have a little piece of "Taylor". But if that is stretching it then just explain it to her. She should understand. Also if you have the daughter first then you get first picks with the names. I know that I already have my future (my girlfriend is not even pregnant yet or anything like that) son's name picked out. Also if you name your daughter Taylor and she has a daughter and names her Taylor it might be kind of cute. They could be the "Taylor sisters" But to summarize your friend should understand. Plus more than one person can have the same name. Hope that helped!
2007-07-23 03:56:23
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answer #4
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answered by Chris P. 3
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My best friend and I went through the same thing. She's on her second one though and I haven't even left the starting gate. Luckily she had a boy so my name is safe. Regardless of what you name your daughter there will be millions of other little kids named Taylor. You can give your baby that name as her middle name if making it her first name is too uncomfortable. Your child got to the name first. Or since Taylor is so common, you may choose to go with a more unique name and forget taylor all together. I would probably forget it since its causing so much drama already.
2007-07-27 20:17:28
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answer #5
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answered by Anonymous
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If your friend and you are so close, you should be able to talk to her about it. I know you dont want to hurt her, but by not speaking to her about it, you are not trusting her to handle the situation as a friend would. Explain the situation as you have above, you never know, she might be honoured, but then again, she may not. In actuality, her baby was never born, and therefore never named, but that may not make any difference to her as it was obviously a very painful time for her. You were upset at the time, as you wanted to call your eventual daughter Taylor, but I guess you did not speak up at the time because of what she was going through.
I do not think you are being selfish, but I do think you should talk to her, especially if you are that close. Also, she tells people she loves this name and will call her daughter by it, so she can hardly get upset about what she might have called the child she lost, and claim you are insensitive as she plans to use it herself.
To be fair, I knew a girl at school called Taylor, she detested the name, said it was old and fussy and sounded like a boy's name or some old stuffy guy making suits in a dank shop. That was her opinion, not mine, I think its quite nice. My daughter is called Kezia (Kez-ee-ah) and loves it, everyone always comments on how pretty her name is, which she also loves. Anyway, whatever way you decide to tackle it, I hope it goes well for you. God bless.
2007-07-23 11:02:48
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answer #6
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answered by Tefi 6
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I wouldn't use it as a first name - might be too much for your friend - seeing a baby girl calling her Taylor will probably bring back all sorts of emotions. What about using it as a middle name in memory of the lost baby? Talk to your friend is the best thing.
2007-07-23 06:42:15
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answer #7
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answered by Anonymous
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Why don't you use Taylor as the middle name and decide on a first name that you really like. Maybe, years down the road the tragedy of your friends lost baby will fade and you can begin referring to your daughter by her middle name Taylor.
2007-07-23 03:54:08
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answer #8
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answered by k1zzar 3
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Ok the fact that you never mentioned the name before puts you in a bad position. I think maybe you can spell it Tayla, or maybe something like Rylie. If you've had your heart set on Taylor and your friend dosnt mind then go for it. I personally like Tayla better. And that might be kinda weird you know what I mean??? So maybe you can get a baby name book and find a new name that you like and if nothing pops out to you then go with Taylor! Good Luck and Congrats!
2007-07-27 15:17:34
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answer #9
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answered by Briana 2
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Maybe you could say that you are naming your little girl in honour of her baby who died - that would be a nice tribute. I don't think you should have to look for a different name - the name is a huge priviledge for a parent to be able to choose. There is a name "Thaila" that sounds like Taylor but isn't exactly the same- remember your child has to have this name for life - once you call the child the name your friend will get used to it and won't be able to imagine your daughter called anything else. It's your choice
2007-07-23 05:43:57
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answer #10
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answered by Anonymous
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I would be inclined to let her have the name Taylor. Since it has a strong emotional connection to your friend (the loss of the baby she would have named Taylor), it may be a painful reminder of the loss she suffered. Perhaps, if the name means that much to you, you could tell her you wanted to name your baby after her baby (like "in memory of"). When I met my husband and became pregnant, I was crushed because I knew I could not use my favorite boys name. It was the same name as my brother-in-law. If I had named my child his name, he would not have been able to name his own son after himself. I loved the name since I was 5, but had to give it up because it was the right thing to do. I found a cool name and have no regrets. Congratulations and Good Luck!!
2007-07-23 03:56:58
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answer #11
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answered by Anonymous
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