My friend is a christian from a Pentecostal Church. She has been dating a single man who is really nice and treats her like a princess. They are both deeply in love but she has been married before and was divorced. (Her ex husband was the one in the wrong - and had an affair, although he won't admit it).
The problem is that her new man is a devout Catholic, and believes that he cannot marry a divorced woman as it would be adultry. Is this right? Is there anything (preferably from the Catholic Bible) that would show him that they can marry?
I care about my friend and want her to be happy.
2007-07-23 02:45:01 · 36 answers · asked by nettyone2003 6 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Your friend could have her first marriage annulled through the church, in the eyes of the catholic church this means the marriage did not occur, therefore he will be able to marry her.
2007-07-23 02:51:36 · answer #1 · answered by madge 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
According to the Catholic bible, God does not and will not recognize a divorce.His thought is when you took the wedding vows, you said until death do us part. Therefore, every time the man or the woman has sex with another after the divorce, they are committing adultery. The church is very firm on that as is the Bible.Had the girl known this, she could have had her marriage annulled by the church. My friend had her annuled after many years and remarried. Only then are you allowed to marry on the Altar.
2007-07-30 10:28:51 · answer #2 · answered by bitsy 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It is written in Mark 12:19-25: 19 Master, Moses wrote unto us, If a man's brother die, and leave his wife behind him, and leave no children, that his brother should take his wife, and raise up seed unto his brother. 20 Now there were seven brethren: and the first took a wife, and dying left no seed. 21 And the second took her, and died, neither left he any seed: and the third likewise. 22 And the seven had her, and left no seed: last of all the woman died also. 23 In the resurrection therefore, when they shall rise, whose wife shall she be of them? for the seven had her to wife. 24 And Jesus answering said unto them, Do ye not therefore err, because ye know not the scriptures, neither the power of ? 25 For when they [women] shall rise from the dead, they neither marry, nor are given in marriage; but are as the angels which are in Heaven.)
Though Catholics believe one thing, the Scriptures speak of another. However, the problem is not that he is a devout Catholic, it is conflicted within himself. He is dating a divorced woman...right? A devout Catholic would not make such a move.
Tell your friend that he may want the milk and not the cow and if he is blaming his religion for his noncommittal, then he should move on.
Good Luck! :-)
2007-07-30 16:11:58 · answer #3 · answered by imnokitty 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
All previous marriages, civil or religious, have to be dealt with before someone can be married in the Catholic Church.
The Catholic Church believes that God does not recognize civil divorces.
Jesus said, "Therefore what God has joined together, no human being must separate." (Mark 10:9)
However there may be hope of a declaration of nullity.
The term "annulment" is a misnomer because the Church does not undo or erase a marriage bond.
Rather the Church issues a declaration of nullity when it discovers that the parties were not truly joined by God and hence a full spiritual sacramental marriage as understood by the Church was not present.
Then the parties are free to marry for the first time.
Approach the appropriate person your in your parish who has been trained in the process. If you encounter difficulties, you may go directly to the diocese.
Be prayerful, honest and patient. It takes a while.
With love in Christ.
2007-07-23 18:42:55 · answer #4 · answered by imacatholic2 7 · 1⤊ 2⤋
As a Catholic, He can marry her (as long as she wasn't married as a Catholic in her first marriage) but she would have to agree either convert to Catholicism or keep her own religion but agree to the Catholic upbringing of any children resulting from this marriage. Should she agree to that, the Catholic church will allow them a "blessing" ceremony rather than a complete marriage ceremony with mass. Your friend and her boyfriend should contact his parish priest for guidance if he is wanting to marry " in" the Church and continue to practice his religion once married. Also she will need to seek guidance at her own church since most protestants do not agree with a lot of the practices of the Catholic church. It sounds like your friend has a lot of serious soul searching to do before continuing this relationship.
2007-07-30 13:16:46 · answer #5 · answered by una_dynamita 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Years ago it may have been seen as adultry,but not any more.He will not be allowed to marry in a catholic church,due to her being divorced and non catholic.
I take it from what you have written that they sleep together,then he is committing a cardinal sin in the eyes of the church are there double standards here.Religion or no Religion if he loves her as much as you say he does then he would go against his church,s beliefs and marry her in a registry office.
2007-07-30 01:12:42 · answer #6 · answered by irene c 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Firstly you need to know whether she was married in a pentecostal church.... if she wasnt .... for instance she just had a civil ceremony then in the eyes of the catholic church she was not married to her ex husband... also it is worth while in checking out as to whether the catholic church recognise a pentecostal marriage...... if she was married in the pentecostal church and it is recognised by the catholic church then the only option would be try for an annulment.... my husband got an annulment from his first marriage but they are quite strict as to who they grant annulments to .... my husbands took 18 months which is quick but his ex wife we discovered had had mental health issues before she married him which he knew nothing about and therefore even though he wasnt a catholic and i was the catholic church annulled his marriage....
What your friends new man should ask his local priest as to who he should contact in the church regarding the criteria for having a marriage annulled....
I am a catholic but was married in a civil ceremony 1st time around so i was free to marry in the eyes of the catholic church but my husband wasnt...
If all else fails they can have a civil ceremony and have the marriage blessed...
Hope this helps
2007-07-24 09:47:37 · answer #7 · answered by dee9166 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
No. Pure Catholics are strict on this one. Catholic lite not so.
I have to ask why is such a devout Catholic dating women outside his religion and formerly married if he is such a devout? If he wants to marry one day a catholic girl (1st timer) in a catholic church he should only be dating ones that fit that strict rigorous credential. (no offense against your friend)
He is wasting her time then too.
Or is he one of those Oh I want to sleep with the world "devout" catholics that then pull the Catholic girl, virgin, cards later....
I'd tell him. Hey you knew what you were getting from the start no deception there, but you however decived me. Doesn't sound like a very good Catholic to me..."Do unto others as you'd have done to you."
2007-07-27 17:29:49 · answer #8 · answered by Woman in Red 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yeah...he needs to consult w/his priest. She needs to have been divorced from her ex legally and, most likely, he wants to make sure its been annulled. That is crucial. You cant find something from the "catholic bible" and show him that'll fix or change anything. It is all up to the church to decide, not you or him. So, that's great to hear he's devout and considerate of his religion. He sounds like an upstanding man. Your friend should be happy to have such a great man and why dont you let them sort it out together.
2007-07-30 16:48:54 · answer #9 · answered by mar_aar 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am catholic but I am sorry as I cannot give you a reference from the bible!
If he is a devout catholic though he cannot live with her or be intimate with her! This is frowned upon! Even being with her is adultry! He is contradicting his faith!
Make these points to him and tell him that if he is doing these things surely marriage will better!
Sorry I couldnt be of much help!
They can get married in chapel! They get a blessing in her church and married in chapel! Or the vicar/minister and the priest can perform the marriage together!
2007-07-23 02:52:59 · answer #10 · answered by emzy 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
A Catholic who divorces in a civil proceeding is still considered married in the eyes of the Catholic Church, and if anyone marries this woman, IT IS considered adultery. I am not an expert in Canon law, so it is best to talk to a Catholic priest who can answer your question, or refer you to someone who can.
2007-07-23 02:56:06 · answer #11 · answered by WC 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋