I've been really close with my cousin and her hubby for a long time. They've been married for about 7 years now. Recently, her hubby and I have become closer. We started talking on the phone a lot in December last year and then we started meeting each other in secret in January. In February we started sleeping together. It only happened a few times and then in March I broke things off. Well, I still can't stop thinking about him. We started talking to each other again about a month ago and I think things might start up again but I'm a little bit scared. I really think I'm in love with him. I'm so happy when we're together. I cry when I think about not being with him. I know this isn't right. But, I don't know what to do. BTW, I'm 19 and he's 36. What do I do? Him and his wife (my cousin) don't get along at all.
2007-07-22 17:55:59 · 12 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Fool
2007-07-22 18:00:04 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 0⤋
If a man wants you, nothing can keep him away.
If he doesn't want you, nothing can make him stay.
Stop making excuses for a man and his behavior.
Allow your intuition (or spirit) to save you from heartache.
Stop trying to change = yourselves for a relationship that's not meant to be.
Slower is better.
Never live your life for a man before you find what makes you truly happy.
If a relationship ends because the man was not treating you as you deserve then heck no, you can't "be friends." A friend wouldn't mistreat a friend.
Don't settle. If you feel like he is stringing you along, then he probably is.
Don't stay because you think "it will get better." You'll be mad at yourself a year later for staying when things are not better.
The only person you can control in a relationship is you.
Avoid men who've got a bunch of children by a bunch of different women. They don't respect women or children. He didn't marry them when he got them pregnant, Why would he treat you any differently?
Always have your own set of friends separate from his.
Maintain boundaries in how a guy treats you.
If something bothers you, speak up.
Never let a man know everything. He will use it against you later.
You cannot change a man's behavior. Change comes from within.
Don't EVER make him feel he is more important than you are...even if he has more education or in a better job. Do not make him into a quasi-god. He is a man, nothing more nothing less.
Never let a man define who you are.
Never borrow someone else's man.
Oh Lord! If he cheated with you, he'll cheat on you.
A man will only treat you the way you ALLOW him to treat you.
All men are NOT dogs.
You should not be the one doing all the bending...compromise is a two-way street.
You need time to heal between relationships...there is nothing cute about baggage... deal with your issues before pursuing a new relationship
You should never look for someone to COMPLETE you...a relationship consists of two WHOLE individuals...look for someone complimentary...not supplementary.
Dating is fun...even if he doesn't turn out to be Mr.. Right.
Make him miss you sometimes...when a man always know where you are, and you're always readily available to him- he takes it for granted.
Don't fully commit to a man who doesn't give you everything that you need.
Keep him in your radar but get to know others.
Source:http://myspace.com/creaturemermaid...
2007-07-23 02:28:38 · answer #2 · answered by Photographer 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are a piece of fluff to him. He isn't going to leave your cousin for you. I am not trying to sound harsh, but thats the truth. You are young, and he is getting older. For you to pay attention to him is a big thrill and turn on for him. But like a previous person said...hope that your cousin doesn't find out. Because that, is going to cause some serious family problems.
2007-07-23 01:11:24 · answer #3 · answered by traceylenore 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Stop with the bull crap..don't' even imply you can't help yourself...that is a lie and you know it. This sounds more like a troll at work than real life. Anyone who admits they have no control of themselves is nothing short of sleazy, and deserve exactly what they will get. Even if he left your cousin, you are going to lose...your family AND him with the next trollop that comes along and can't help herself! Bull! We all control who we fall in love with, and you have crossed the line. I certainly hope you are not looking for sympathy here, or encouragement. You ain't gonna get it from me.
2007-07-23 01:26:03 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
Ooo! You're in for a lot of trouble. No one forced you to sleep with him. I know what it is to love someone you shouldn't have, but the age difference there and the fact that you are related to his wife is a recipe for disaster. You have to let something happen before it does. And you have let it. So, you are responsible for future heartache. And believe me, you will have that heartache.
2007-07-23 01:10:37 · answer #5 · answered by crazywoman88 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Since him and your cousin don't get alone, try to stay as far away from the situation as you can and wait for the
"defication to hit the rotating occilator!" A divorce is coming and if not he will be with your cousin.
2007-07-23 01:01:15 · answer #6 · answered by baseballdad69 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
As long as you allow him to have you while he's with his wife (your cousin), then he will continue to have his cake and eat it too.
Your worth more than a "in the side lines" relationship.
You must end it and if he wants to be with you, he will divorce, and come running back to you. If he doesn't, he was never yours to begin with.
2007-07-23 01:09:50 · answer #7 · answered by Jessica 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
im with ncgirl,,,do you realize how many people you are going to hurt and disappoint when this thing gets found out? and it will. and since he's 36, im assuming there are children involved. hes looking at you like a young piece and a good time...stop being so stupid
2007-07-23 01:08:59 · answer #8 · answered by vanessa c 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Remember these two sayings:
Oh what a tangled web we weave, when first we practice to deceive
Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned
You better hope your cousin never finds out.
2007-07-23 01:05:41 · answer #9 · answered by ncgirl 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Get a pen and paper and start writing all of the reasons that you should not go on with this. Write them all down and get them memorized...Then forget about your cousins damn husband!
2007-07-23 01:19:18 · answer #10 · answered by pappysgotitgoinon 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋