According to the experts in psychology,what are good ways to learn to love yourself ?

Question

I am retired elem teacher and empty nest and divorced and I know I need to practice this. Long long story, but if any experts or professionals know, I have given so much to my own kids and students and now that I'm alone, huh ? How do we learn to love ourselves, step by step, little things

I would love to volunteer but I have CFIDS and my health is shakey at best. I hate it because I was a real goer,but that really limits what I can do. My kids have rejected me they are 28 and 30 so pain here and just personality differences we love each other but can't communicate. Can't fix that have tried.

God is my husband but I sure would like someone with skin on as we say :)

Answer 1

True Self-ishness always leads to joy, because it is motivated always by
the desire to feel as good as possible. It is only when we are Self-ish
enough to be, do and act in accordance with our desires (not someone
else’s) that it is possible to stay balanced. Energetically speaking, a
desire is a rush of life force energy, a connection to the divine inner
self, which can never result in actions that are harmful. It is only
when true desires are blocked that they become twisted and ugly. This
statement goes against the common wisdom that human nature is greedy,
violent and primitive. Human nature is precisely the opposite: we are
born knowing ourselves as powerful, eternal, spiritual beings. Petty,
competitive, churlish and violent behavior must be
overcome with suitable practice. Observe your family, friends
and coworkers. Almost all of them are good people, trying to do the best
they can. It would simply not be possible to build a sophisticated
society if human nature was so base. All successful societies are based
upon cooperation, not competition. Competition works not because it is
adversarial, but because it inspires teamwork. Ask two angry guys to get
something constructive done, it is not going to happen. All
success is based upon cooperation. That is because we live in an
attraction based universe.

These natural impulses are supposed to be dangerous because they stem
from a primitive survival instinct. But human being has a bette mind
than animals. Just look around at the mess the world is in! But that is
a delusional assertion, a denial of the basic nature of consciousness
itself. The natural impulses of human nature stem from a connection to
life force, and it is resistance to this divine impulse which causes the
selfish behavior people object to.

If you observe people you will quickly see that those persons who are
most alive are full of desire, and those who look lifeless have little
or no desire. Desire = life force. Shut off desire = selfish behavior.
It's ironic that selfish behavior actually results from self-denial.

Human nature is not a primitive, biological instinct based on survival
of the fittest, it’s a pure connection to source energy. It is divine.
It's only when that connection is closed off that selfish behavior is
demonstrated. Every one of your desires is, in its non-resisted state,
joyful and balanced, because that is an inherent property of
consciousness itself. True selfishness is allowance of desire, without
resistance, and results in the impulse to give freely to others. But it
is first necessary to allow that impulse within yourself.

http://kjmaclean.com/Selfishness.html

Answer 2

We all at certain times in our life feel very alone. We think that having family around all the time feels a void.
All it does is create an apmosphere when we don't have time to think about what do I really want? What is important to me?
Was your whole lifes work or worth to create and raise children in an over populated world? Or to try to be a house keeper to someone who wanted to leave you?
As a school teacher that is retired there is so much good you could do to help disadvantage children. The school system is so over burdened that some kids slip through the cracks and graduate without the skills to hold down a job which throws them into a life of poverty. Some children are in foster care that no one actually cares about them their whole life.
One older lady who had raised her children and was just fine he husband passed away. Took in several foster girls.
She taught the to read and write, math. Caught them up with the other kids in school. Dressed them in decent clothes and gave them the self esteem to succeed in life.
Told them that no matter what they had done it was not their fault but the fault of their parents. Gave her the courage to go on and she got a GED. She just couldn't go back to high school it was just to painful. Go her into Votech and she learned to be an Accountant. Now she helps run a company.
She said, "If it hadn't of been for her I would be dead by now"
This lady told her I know what it feels like to be depressed.
I to had thoughts of sucide, but I am so glad I didn't because I wouldn't have been here to make such a change in your life.
This women has changed the lives of many young girls who were depressed and sad and felt they had no where to go.
She was so successful because she knew how they felt.

Answer 3

That positive self talk stuff is Crapola. Having good self esteem isn't about looking at yourself in the mirror and saying, "I'm great, I'm wonderful, and gosh darnitt, people like me!" To get your self esteem up, first you have to figure out what is making it low. Are there self percieved weaknesess that make you feel bad about yourself? Work on yourself until you strengthen those areas. If you are a horrible mathematitian and that makes you feel stupid, then practice and learn to understand it, ect.. Do things that MAKE you feel good about yourself, such as accomplishing things you've always wanted to do. Create in yourself a clean conscience. Are there people that you've wronged, and that fills you with a certain amount of self- loathing? Make it right. Even if all you can do is apologize. Finally, get right with God. I'm not going to tell you what religion to belong to, but having a religion, and practicing it faithfully has a huge impact on pple's self image and happiness.

Answer 4

I strongly agree Now a days it extremely is a real job human beings attempt to stipulate theirsevles by making use of the garments they positioned on and the flaws they have and overlook to even question their genuine which potential of self If i'm able to love myself unconditionally, i'm able to love somebody else the comparable way.

Answer 5

I'm not an expert; however, my counselor said to self-talk yourself into learning to be comfortable in your skin.

Answer 6

you have to love yourself cause you may be the only one doing it! the world suck!!!!!!!!!