What everybody think about this...?
Almost 4 month ago My husband and I we are living apart. He is in his home and I'm living with my parents.
And my husband is dating somebody already!!! For me is disrespectful!!! I'm very sad because I never will do that to him, so fast !
For 2 weekends his car was not there and I pass by his home around 11:30 pm, and las friday was a car seating in his driveway..hmmmm I'm assume he is dating a women??
Very sad...and we still married !!! We did not starting with the divorce , we are just living apart, we are not legally separated either
Do you think I'm right in being upset or he should do wherever he wants???Anyway I do not going to tell him anything
Advice please!
Thank you!
2007-07-22 04:26:17 · 23 answers · asked by mimi72 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Thank you to everybody !
Yes, it is very sad...But if he wants to divorce me and move on , why he is not honest with me and tell me the truth.!!Because when I asked him what we are going to do? He said _ I'm still thinking about it, I'm not sure..he said
Why he does not tell me that he is dating somebody?? and all it is over , finish! He should file for divorce ! But he does not!! I do not know why??
Sorry, I'm very upset!
2007-07-22 04:40:41 · update #1
To stylist,
You said I should find out if he is seeing some one. Do you have any idea how I can find out if he is seeing another women?. Ideas please!! Because it is difficult... Sometimes I'm passing by for his home. But, I can not knoot the door , he will be really mad!!!
Thank you!
2007-07-29 15:25:00 · update #2
you have every right to be upset. that is a slimeball move in my eyes. i think that you should confront him about it. breakups are a hard thing to go through and this may be his way of dealing with it. i would just let him know that if he wants to end the marriage, then he needs to do it the right way. no sneaking behind your back with another woman. and expect the worst. that way you are less likely to be terrible torn apart by his decision. also, let him know that you care about his feelings and do not holler & scream at him. have a civilized, adult conversation with him.
2007-07-29 12:48:06 · answer #1 · answered by Poot-a-loop 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You mention that he is in HIS home. Was that home YOUR home also or did he own it outright. You had better do some checking because if you are getting a divorce, you should be able to get the value out of that home. What you are going through IS disrespectful, but it IS happening, and you will never be able to stop it if he does not want to. Question is will you be able to accept him back into your life if he makes up his mind he still wants you and your marriage to continue. Lots of misery can be brought to you if you cannot think of this aspect of your relationship with him. You probably will never be able to trust him again, it is so hard to go through, but your life WILL go on after this is all over.....
2007-07-29 09:13:22 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
The reason he said he's still thinking about it is that he wants to make sure he has something 'lined up' to replace what he had. Jerk!
You're right to be upset but at least you are getting information about how he really is when you are not around. That should help you later when you start having doubts about whether you could have made the marriage work. It takes two to do that!
2007-07-29 16:35:10 · answer #3 · answered by kathyw 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First, let me assure you that, if your husband is seeing someone else he is WRONG. You should not just allow him to do whatever he wants.
You need to confront him about his behavior. If you are afraid to do this alone take someone with you. You also need to let him know that you have boundaries and limitations and you will not let him treat you like crap. Give him a choice - you or divorce. He is not free to be with other women. Stand up for yourself.
Your husband does not understand commitment. Do not get back together with him unless and until you get counseling and he commits to the relationship and to answering to someone besides you for his actions. You are better than this! Value yourself and if he doesn't value you, move on.
Read some good books. I've listed a couple of the very best. God bless you and be strong.
2007-07-29 23:34:58 · answer #4 · answered by whiteparrot 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Go & finalize the divorce already. This guy has been cheating & having sex, not just dating, with at least one lady far longer than 4 months ago.
Hopefully there are no kids involved on either side. Kids do not need all of this selfish crap.
Edited: YOU need to finalize the divorce. He is cheating on you. He will not finalize the divorce himself because he wants to be on good terms with you, so he can always have a lady "on the side." He may also be trying to avoid having to pay child support, if there are kids involved. YOU need to dump him for good.
2007-07-22 11:31:02 · answer #5 · answered by Daiquiri Dream 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Because he wants his cake & eat it too. Instead of sitting around wondering & worrying or driving by the house checking up on him why don't you sit him down & tell him you 2 need to either work it out or go ahead & file for divorce. Your letting him take advantage of the situation.
2007-07-29 12:26:16 · answer #6 · answered by texas tornado 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Most people when they Separate, do go on to see and date other people. You are no longer living as a married couple. Let him go and Move on with your Life and be happy.
2007-07-30 10:43:47 · answer #7 · answered by donna_honeycutt47 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds to me like your husband has moved on. He appears to be done with you emotionally. Yes you are still legally married, but you can't hold him back if he wants to date someone while still married to you.....it is very disrespectful in my opinion. If he is not wanting to fix your marriage I would suggest you find a divorce attorney.
2007-07-22 11:31:27 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
if you were legally separated, you couldn't do anything about him being with another woman. since you are just living apart, you should be the one to file for divorce on grounds of adultery. i know that this hurts you very much, but don't wait around for him to do anything. get busy getting on with your life and be the one to file for divorce. good luck hun.
2007-07-22 12:02:17 · answer #9 · answered by sweet serinity 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Maybe you need to find someone secretly, like another woman? Most guys don't consider that cheating or dating. It's something all guys wished their woman did. I'm sure you still love him and it hurts but you live only once and if you think your husband is dating already than your probably right. Guys like to lie about that sort of thing and they also think that their wives are dumb. I am married and even though we are happy, we weren't always and whenever my husband lies to me I always know when he is lying. So just stay happy no matter what you have to do but it seems like to me that you are better off and find someone who won't lie to you. Like a woman!
2007-07-30 10:39:48 · answer #10 · answered by Tessie 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋