Do you think you should have to drive your newborn places so people can see him?

Question

My husbands parents and siblings live out of state(the same state). They are putting a lot of pressure on my husband for us to drive there so they can see the baby. Like, very soon after he is born they want us there. I think they should come see us. What do you think? By the way, we have 2 other kids who will be in school.

Answer 1

I've NEVER driven my newborn baby out of state so that family could meet him/her for the first time. Its common sense that the family members should come to you if at all possible. If they can't, then they'll just have to wait until you can plan a weekend getaway. My parents and siblings always plan a visit to come see me the week or two after the baby arrives. While they are here, they don't expect for me to hop up and cater to them either. If I feel like taking the baby to the mall or something, then fine. Otherwise, we just all sit at home and laugh, talk and enjoy the new arrival.

I think its rather rude of them to insist that you come to them. Maybe I'm just having a hormonal day..... Just tell them that you don't feel up to traveling after the birth, the kids will be in school and you don't think its appropriate to take a newborn on such a long car trip.

Answer 2

I don't think that you should have to go there, at all! Your having a newborn baby that needs to eat every 2 hours, why should you have to drive anywhere. I can see maybe when the baby is 1 years old then ok. But I think that they should come see you. My dad and his parents came to see my 2 month old son this weekend- and it wasn't even a question as to who was going to drive where. The fact that your other children have school as well makes the situation more difficult. They should come see you and I think you should probably be point blank with them or they will keep nagging! Best wishes!

Answer 3

Tell them your doctor has told you, that you need to stay at home for 40 days after birth with the baby. And if they want to see baby they can drive on over, or you'll send them some photos.

This is your child, your body and your family. It is your choice to get in a car and drive to another state wasting gas money. What will your children do? Skip school? No, they need to understand what is going on in your family, regardless of a new baby or not. Speak up for yourself and your family.

Answer 4

I would kindly explain to them that the other children couldn't miss school, and that it would be too much to travel that far with a newborn baby, and that you would be happy to accommodate them in your home if they would like. And if that doesn't work, send them some pictures, and don't worry about it, because if they really want to see the baby, they will come.

Answer 5

They should make the time to go see you... not vice versa.

You just had a baby and life is absolutely crazy right now. It's a bit selfish of them to think that you should have to uproot it even more just to satisfy their desire to see the new addition. I would politely explain to them that you would love for them to spend time with your new baby, however, your other children are adjusting and it would be much easier on them (and you!) if your husband's family would make the trip instead.

Answer 6

I live in CT and have family in OK. They tried pullin the same crap. I basically said that I didnt want to chance my baby getting sick and pulled my "I just had a baby and dont feel like I can sit for that long of a ride" In your case you can tell them that these days when kids miss so many days of school they automatically have to stay back.

needless to say they never came, they didnt see her till she was 9 months old.....we went for xmas

Answer 7

i agree with you, especially since you have other children who would be in school at the time. tell them to come see you. you could always go on a weekend with all the kids but i would wait til the baby was about a month or older

Answer 8

I believe the assumption of driving for a couple of minutes to make certain if he will fall alseep, yet whilst no longer, pulling over. easily in simple terms be sure you have sunblock on the toddler and/or a window demonstrate, particularly if youll be driving for a collectively as. solar can are available the process the window and burn the toddler or make him initiate crying b/c of the brightness in his face. the ease of newborns is they sleep alot, so possibly he would be asleep and could no longer comprehend he's on my own! :)

Answer 9

Heck no I wouldn't drive there!! If it's that important to them they can come to you. You are going to be exhausted and run ragged as it is with having a new baby and 2 more in school. They shouldn't expect you to come to them. You and your husband need to be firm and say "no"...they can come to you.

Answer 10

I know what you mean, my sister-in-law lives in the same city, and she never has the nerve of coming to our house to see my children. I don't tale them to her house, but since she works for my mother-in-law, she sometimes calls me to take them there so that she can see them. Sometimes I do go, because it get me out of the house, but I've told my husband that I'm not going to do it all the time, it's not fair, if she wants to see them she can come to our house as well. I've told my husband that I think she has some type superiority complex and thinks she's the queen of I don't know what. He agrees with me, and doesn't like me taking them to her, he gets very upset, and when she has invited us to her house (for the same reason) he refuses to go, he'll find an excuse to not make it, or he'll occupy himself on something else, just so that time goes by and that way he'll call her later and tell he wasn't able to make it. I can see where she gets it from, their father is the same way, he never goes to see his grandkids, she has to take them to him, because if no, it will go months without him seeing them, he thinks that if he calls and asks and get some pictures over the internet is more than enough. To tell you he hasn't even met our second baby, she's now 6 months old, he saw our first born when he was 2 months old, he's now 2 1/2 years old, I know he and my husband don't talk, but come on, the kids aren't at fault, but I guess that's just the way he and his daughter are.
Sorry about my long story, regarding yours, I do think it's inconsiderate of them to expect you and your family to drive up there for them to meet your newborn, in my opinion, they should be the ones to drive to you, your baby is the addition not them, and as such your little one deserves the honor of people going out of the way to come see him. They just want you to go there because it's what's most convenient to them, you have your family and they have a schedule to keep up with, and honestly, when one has just given birth just the thought of being in the car is so sickening, I'm sure you'll just want to rest, besides it's not comfortable for a little one to be in those uncomfortable car seats for extended periods of time.
Try talking to your husband, maybe he can talk to them and tell them to come see your baby instead of you having to go drive up there, and if they don't want too, send them a picture and they will get a chance to meet the baby on your next family reunion :o) <--- smile
I wish you the best of luck with this situation, I know what you feel and I'm sure I know what you think as well. I hope you can get your way on this, and have them come visit you.
God bless you!
Congratulations on your new addition!