My parents divorce and me?

Question

When I was two my mom left my father in the middle of the night in Dallas and moved home to Des Moines Iowa, to raise us (me and my brother) around her family. He met someone two years later in Dallas and moved to Seattle with her and had another child he never really helped financially or with anything and he thinks that he is right because she is the one who left. True she did, but that doesn't excuse not helping, does it? I need closure.

Answer 1

Your parents divorced each other, not you. Speak to your Mother first and explain to her that you need to make contact with your Father to tell him you feel he abandoned you. If he didn't contribute financially to your upbringing - beware, he might not be a nice person..

Answer 2

Parents are a biological necessity...and in most cases, a social reality. Your father probably did the best he could. You don't know what was going through his head...or your mother's head when the separation happened. If you want real closure, then communicate with him and decide whether you want him to have a place in your life. Remember, regardless of how you feel about him, he is still your biological father. You carry his genes, some of his characteristics, and some memories. He will always be a part of you. How you deal with that issue is up to you...but it might help to communicate with him before you decide to cut him out of your life.

Answer 3

I agree with judgebill in the aspect that the only real closeure will come from talking with your father, on the other hand just because he is your biological father doesn't mean you owe him anything, he only gave you his genes...GL

Answer 4

I would suggest that you try to make contact with your father and get to know him. Be prepared, there's no way to know how he'll respond.

Realize that your mom leaving--and your Dad not supporting--are their issues. Your issue is to know your Mom and Dad, if possible, and try to have a relationship with them.