i have twin daughers they are 15..both have boyfriends i often talk to them about having sex and waiting unitl they are married or older so they can be responsible about it. my one daughter has been dating this guy for a year and a half i completly approve of him i absolutly think they are a great couple and im very proud of how great they are, i def. know they are not having sex < i am very close to that twin and shes very trustworthy..my other daughter has been with her boyfriend for 3 months and i read on her AOL IM (she had asked me to fix something on her computer when this popped up) i read that her and her boyfriend were planning on doing "69" "96" and "71" i know what 69 is but what do the other numbers mean? and it also said i cant wait to bang (meaning sex?) please help me i dont know what to say and i want to make sure i know what those numbers mean so i can help her. thanks!
2007-07-21 09:42:41 · 15 answers · asked by alm27 3 in Health ➔ Women's Health
Talk to her about it. As hard as it may be, pull her aside (SOON) when there are no other distractions around, sit her down, and tell her that you need to talk. Don't be confrontational; rather, just voice your concerns, and tell her that it was a complete accident that you even saw that in the first place. (So she won't get mad at you for "snooping around.") Remind her again about the physical danger of unwanted pregnancy and STDs, but also, the emotional trauma. (God designed s-- for married couples, as a way of two becoming one, and when you don't have that commitment BEFORE you do it, it won't work. It'll break you.)
But moreover, listen to everything she has to say with a loving heart and an open mind; avoid an argument, and you might just save her from making the biggest mistake of her life.
God bless you!
2007-07-21 09:50:20 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
Aw You sound like a very good mother and your daughter and her boyfriend sound like good kids too. I am 18. My mom never had a 'sex talk' with me and I had no interest in asking friends. I had to educate myself about it through magazines and such. I know how weird and awkward it would be, but i do wish she would ask me. Tonight I went to the pharmacy by myself and bought a pregnancy test, There was about 6 different boxes to choose from. Putting it on the counter in the store was probably in my Top 10 Most Alone moments. Thank God it blinked Not Pregnant. It wouldve felt different if Mom were there to help me, but honestly, she never made herself available and i'm too embarassed to bring it up. I dont know who is the worst in that situation... If your daughter is having sex, would you be angry at her? Or happy for her?
2016-05-19 06:20:22 · answer #2 · answered by ? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It appears your daughter is definitely having sex of all kinds, and you need to talk to her. Since this came up while you were on her computer I think you should mention that so she knows you were not snooping. Use this time to try to establish a closer relationship with your daughter. Talk to her frankly as a friend, as well as, a mother. If you do not approve let her know that, but also be understanding so you can help her understand all that is associated with sexual activities. If she has experienced it she is probably going to continue so it is important she understand the dangers from a health and physical standpoint. Then insist she get on birth control, and be sure you know she is using it as directed. Personally I think 15 is too young, but it does happen more and more all of the time. My daughter is 20, and I know how she struggled with this through her teens. At 17 she felt she could hold out no longer. Fortunately she was able to talk to me and we got her on birth control and everything worked out. She is now in pre-med, doing very well in school, and still sexually active with no intention of having children in the foreseeable future. I know this is a big concern for you, but it can also have a good outcome if it helps you improve your relationship and become closer with this daughter. Good luck to you.
2007-07-21 10:19:11 · answer #3 · answered by K K 5 · 3⤊ 0⤋
I'm not familiar with those other numbers but you should confront her about having sex. Tell her you don't agree with doing it but if she has to you want her to do it safely with protection and get her on the pill. Teenagers are going to do what they want to when it comes to sex NOT what we tell them to do. Their hormones are going crazy at this time and they want to experiment. Probably all of her friends are doing the same and they think they have to also. I have two daughters and two sons and they are all grown with their own families. My daughter was experimenting so I told her that, she went for the pill. She got through college and has now had her first baby at the age of 30. If I wouldn't have tried to help her with her decision she probably would have become pregnant as a teenager and would have a completly different life now.
2007-07-21 09:53:51 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
By what you've just told us, I can safely assume she has not had intercourse just yet but she's on the verge of it and this is the time that you must step in and let her know that you are there for her. The numbers 71 mean intercourse anally. As for the 96, I've heard that it means swinging, or having sex with an opposite couple,although I'm not too sure on that one.
2007-07-21 09:54:59 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 2⤋
she probably has already had sex with someone if she's being this much of a sex fiend. I know and have had friends who first start talking about it, then they do it, in RAPID succession. I think its best if you punish her severely, call the boyfriend's parents, and get her in so much trouble that she'll cry! Your daughter is being a moron and it could ruin her life and yours (i dont think you want to babysit a kid at this moment)...
2007-07-21 11:08:00 · answer #6 · answered by JRodriguez 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
i know what the 69 means but i have never heard of the others! i am very sorry and i know that that must be tough! But i dont think that there is anything that you can do besides talk to her about it. if you make them break up and all of that then she is just going to go behind your back and do it. and that is worse.
2007-07-21 09:49:32 · answer #7 · answered by brittany t 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Whatever you do, don't make her feel like a bad person for having sex. It's her decision. Just talk to her about being safe.
2007-07-21 09:58:47 · answer #8 · answered by CuntLuvr 2 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Exactly. Who cares about the numbers. Go talk to her.
...and consider upscaling your supervision.
2007-07-21 09:51:01 · answer #9 · answered by GeriGeri 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
you just need to talk to her about it. dont get mad because that will tell her that you dont trust her. you should try being more understanding. ultimately its her choice, but if she decides to continue you definately need to talk to her about birth control so she can be safe. if you get mad it may make her do it even more and it wont get better. so like i said be understanding.
2007-07-21 09:52:15 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋